HeidiGetsChicks
Songster
- Apr 15, 2023
- 94
- 291
- 116
I did not know where to put this thread...
I just completed my first incubation, and lost my first live chick. The chick died because it was placed in a brooder with siblings a couple days older that were stronger, and my mama heat plate went down to the floor on one side which I was told was a totally acceptable way to do it. But this little one got trapped against the heat by her siblings, and by the time i discovered it it was too late.
She's been dead for over 24 hours and I currently still have her in my bra. I swear I feel signs of life. I know she wouldn't come back and be healthy; her eyes are open and dried out and she hasn't moved in over 24 hours. I know she's gone.
What helps me grieve is to be as respectful of life as possible. So even though I knew she was gone, I read up on chicks coming back from the brink of death and did all the things, knowing that even if it can't save this one the hands on knowledge i gain might save the next. It showed me that I want to have a second incubator on hand that can be used as a "sick chick hospital" for ones that are under 48 hours old and can't be in with siblings yet need more care than can be provided while eggs are still incubating.
Speaking of eggs, I had a 50% hatch rate. 4 eggs didn't make it. Today I opened up the eggs starting with a safety hole since it was "only" day 24. Three of them died very late, and one early on in the incubating (I didn't learn about the importance of candling until lockdown). I think the ones that died late did so when I moved then to another incubator since the first couldn't get its humidity up. Or it might have been when I raised the temperature by one degree since I read other people were keeping their incubator hotter. Three pipped that very day, but I think others couldn't handle it. Or it might have been because i stopped turning the eggs two days early since I miscalculated. Or because I kept opening the incubator to let humidity out while the first chick was hatching.
So many mistakes.
Whatever the case, I carefully opened up each egg as if it could be a live chick inside, applying coconut oil to the membranes, in order to get the hands on experience of assisting for next time. I felt so sad that I failed them. But the best way I know to grieve is to give them the respect I feel they deserve. I carefully uncurled and dried off each unhatched chick into its own paper towel. We will bury them today.
I'm crying a lot. Will I ever get used to it? I'm not sure. I'm not sure I'm supposed to get used to it. But I hope I learn the ropes of emotionally letting myself experience this. It's both a downside and a gift to familiarize with death up close--a downside because it's so painful, and a gift because death is inescapable and so to experience reality in small ways you learn how to accept it and let it be.
Thank you for letting me share.
I just completed my first incubation, and lost my first live chick. The chick died because it was placed in a brooder with siblings a couple days older that were stronger, and my mama heat plate went down to the floor on one side which I was told was a totally acceptable way to do it. But this little one got trapped against the heat by her siblings, and by the time i discovered it it was too late.
She's been dead for over 24 hours and I currently still have her in my bra. I swear I feel signs of life. I know she wouldn't come back and be healthy; her eyes are open and dried out and she hasn't moved in over 24 hours. I know she's gone.
What helps me grieve is to be as respectful of life as possible. So even though I knew she was gone, I read up on chicks coming back from the brink of death and did all the things, knowing that even if it can't save this one the hands on knowledge i gain might save the next. It showed me that I want to have a second incubator on hand that can be used as a "sick chick hospital" for ones that are under 48 hours old and can't be in with siblings yet need more care than can be provided while eggs are still incubating.
Speaking of eggs, I had a 50% hatch rate. 4 eggs didn't make it. Today I opened up the eggs starting with a safety hole since it was "only" day 24. Three of them died very late, and one early on in the incubating (I didn't learn about the importance of candling until lockdown). I think the ones that died late did so when I moved then to another incubator since the first couldn't get its humidity up. Or it might have been when I raised the temperature by one degree since I read other people were keeping their incubator hotter. Three pipped that very day, but I think others couldn't handle it. Or it might have been because i stopped turning the eggs two days early since I miscalculated. Or because I kept opening the incubator to let humidity out while the first chick was hatching.
So many mistakes.
Whatever the case, I carefully opened up each egg as if it could be a live chick inside, applying coconut oil to the membranes, in order to get the hands on experience of assisting for next time. I felt so sad that I failed them. But the best way I know to grieve is to give them the respect I feel they deserve. I carefully uncurled and dried off each unhatched chick into its own paper towel. We will bury them today.
I'm crying a lot. Will I ever get used to it? I'm not sure. I'm not sure I'm supposed to get used to it. But I hope I learn the ropes of emotionally letting myself experience this. It's both a downside and a gift to familiarize with death up close--a downside because it's so painful, and a gift because death is inescapable and so to experience reality in small ways you learn how to accept it and let it be.
Thank you for letting me share.
did she have a name? that must
