Everything's Changing

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Seperating/divorce--- you have to shift into survival mode!

Basics-- keep it down to the basics.

House = roof over your children's heads.

Pets/critters = not required for survival.

You might want to think about your living arrangement plans anyway. What I heard/read was nonstop complaints pertaining to what your sister does in the same home. If you are complaining now, what do you think you are going to be doing in a year?
 
I am sorry you are going through a divorce!

As a parent who has had to open our home to grown kids it is tough to do so. I realize that you are seeing some of the boundaries that he is setting up as rough but... if he is willing and able to put a roof over your head~ for free, then begger's can't be choosy. Sorry if you were renting then you would still have rules regarding pets. We allow pets in our rental unit but.... require a $250 deposit as we got royally screwed once with a pet owner. Most places won't allow pets. Your Dad could be making something off his house by renting it out and he is not.

I agree with the previous poster that you are going into survival mode. Kids are expensive, pets are expensive too and you stated you are going to school with little to no job so money isn't really coming in. That and I don't think I could live with my sister now as an adult much less put up with the parties.

Good luck!
 
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i find this sorta rude. its' rather condescending. She knows it's his house and what it pertains to.

anyway, i do hope that things work out. I can totally understand not wanting to give up your pets.. i have been in that situation.. it's not easy. When we moved.. my cat never peed in my old house.. this house had no smells.. that i could tell. then one day.. he started to pee on his chair that we moved from the old house. he was fine at first.. peeing in his box.. then i noticed no pees in his box.. and the chair was wet(not one that anyone sat in, thank god) so.. indoor/outdoor cat, became fully outdoor cat LOL.

Good luck.
 
Thanks, chickeypoo.
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At this point I'm trying to find someone, anyone to take my cats for a year. I need someone I can trust and someone who can deal with their special needs. I'll pay for food, make sure they get their shots, etc before they go, but I'm hoping someone can take them.

I called my dad today to double-check that it's just the cats that are the problem, and now he's telling me something about how there are other issues as well and maybe if we can talk things through I can move in in about three months. When I reminded him that we are selling the house, he said I should find somewhere temporary to move to for a couple of months then move again into his house. I asked if he knew how hard it was to move with two kids and an entire household of belongings. He said we'd talk later.

*sigh of frustration*

__________

And as an addendum to what chickeypoo kindly pointed out--I'm young, and I'm a lady--but I'm not a child. I have been on my own for ten years and married for six of them. Yes I'm in school but I am a returning student. My marriage is falling apart and it sucks. I'm trying my darndest to do what is best for me and my family. My family includes critters. Yes my kids come first, but my animals are also a part of the family and I don't take my responsibilities lightly, which is why I'm trying to move in with my dad. I never, ever, EVER wanted to go back home; where I felt trapped for most of my childhood--but I will do what I need to.
 
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I feel for you...
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I WISH so bad that i lived closer to you..i'd foster those cats in a heartbeat.
Darn!!!
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ETA: HEY! Maybe start a thread asking for help with the cats, in your state...??
 
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Hmmm now that you have updated and it sounds like he is going to make you move more than once... With kids (YUCK)... I don't think that it would be my first choice for living. Sorry, I know what a pain it was to move my kids to this house and they were 2, 3 and 5, I would not want to move again just after getting settled.

Did you say that you had found another place, where you could keep the animals? Regardless I would have the chat with Dad sooner than later and try and get a straight answer from him.


I hope you get this figured out soon and that your Dad understands what a tough time this is for you. And I really hope you don't have to move more than once!!! Good luck.
 
at this point, if i were you, id find a place i could afford, and take my family and move, dont contact anyone and dont answer cel phones. I personally wouldnt ever want to move back in with my parents, nor would i expect them to house me, but my parents only ever do those things for my brother.

i moved out at 16- he moved out at 24 or 25 after being married for months.
 
I understand that moving there would save you $$ but it really does sound like more hassle not only with him but if you have to put up with your sister too. If it was me, I would suffer through and get my own place, I think in the end you will thank yourself more for that.
My animals would stay with me, I have been divorced and if it weren't for the animals, I would be locked up in a padded room right now.
Good Luck , hope it all works out.
 
Between the issues with sister, the house not being available for a month or so, Dad and his allergies and the fact you'd have to move twice in a short period of time......I think I'd just find another place to begin with and stay there. You said you found one that would let you keep all of your animals, go check it out. It would save you on gas from driving supplies back and forth to where your animals are, it will keep you from having to move again in a month or two, it will eliminate the issues with living with sister (which would be enough alone to make me not want to live in Dad's house) and will keep your relationship with your Dad on better ground (it sounds like). That way he can't complain that both of his daughter's are keeping him from renting that house out, just her, and any damages can only be blamed on her, etc.

Good luck!
 
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I agree with this one! Go and check it out!

There are places you can check out for housing assistance. Or apply for your assistance thru your county for food stamps, housing, etc.
 

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