Funniest Things A City Slicker Has Ever Said To You?

[AllChookUp]

I worked on a lake resort in my hometown as a teenager - good money.

I was standing on a hill overlooking the lake, talking with Tennessee Ernie Ford one day (he stayed there twice).

He noticed all the staggered patterns, like paths almost, that the wind made across the surface of the lake, and asked what caused that.

I jokingly told him that was where the snowmobiles went in the winter on the ice, and that packed the water underneath down, making the water level a couple inches lower on those areas - That's why there were the patterns.

I thought he knew I was kidding.

The next day I was walking past the manager's office, and he hauled me in by my collar to yell at me. He wanted to know why Tennessee Ernie Ford was walking around, making a fool of himself by telling people that the lake water was actually lower on some parts of the lake than other.

Hey, I couldn't help it if Mr. Ford was foolish enough to believe something like that. Don't they have wind & water in Tennessee?

 

[MoodyChicken]

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LOL that's really hilarious. I raised a pig a few years ago. I had a gilt and my friend had a barrow. My mom stopped by to see our pigs. "That one's a boy because it pees in the middle, right?"

 

[Chicken Lil]

While at the grocery store teh other day I overheard the following converstaion between a grown mand and his young son (maybe 4-5 yrs old)

Son: How come some of the eggs are brown

Father: because the chickens didn't wipe thier butts before they layed the eggs

My husbamd and I laughed so hard I thought I was going to faint.

But at least they knew eggs came from chicken butts!

 

[tcwk]

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haha that's some good stuff

 

[Year of the Rooster]

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That one takes the iceing on the cake

 

[duck&chickencrazy]

When my sister and i were looking for a dog we stopped at this ladys house (she had a puppy that we were looking at) and we started talking with her and she told us of a woman that was there before us looking for a dog...and the woman asked if the dog pooped....she was from the city...

 

[sweetshoplady]

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as opposed to the new freshly born rocks

Next time I go to a landscape rock place, I'm going to ask for newborn rocks and how long it'll take them to grow up into those big rocks over there.

My SIL just had surgery and I said to my gram that SIL had her egg sack removed. And that the next time I go to my Drs office I want to know where my giblets are.

 

[Cetawin]

OMG this thread is killing me and jarring my memories for sure...so let's try these


While walking my show Charolais cow out of the fair barn one day a lady said

"Beautiful! What breed of horse is that?"


I had a insurance salesman at my house one day look at our peacocks and ask very seriously...

"Are those chickens imported from the islands somewhere?"


But my all time favorite one came from a ditzy trophy wife whose husband was buying a horse from us...

Walking through the barn behind her husband she re-stated each of comments on the various horses and she looked in the stall her husband was looking into... and standing there facing away from her was a huge nearly 17h TB stallion...she says loudly and plainly to her husband, apparently trying to appear knowledgable...

"I do not think we should buy her because she has deformaties on her backside...just there under her tail"

Do I need to tell you what she was pointing at? Nor do I need to tell you the look of humiliation that crossed her face when I explained what those deformaties on HER were?

 

[Lunachick]

I was actually in the city once when a little kid spotted a flock of pigeons and said "Daddy look chickens!" And Daddy said, "Oh, yes look!"

I can understand the little kid, but the Dad?

 

[CountryMom]

Two of my all time favorites involve city slickers and horses....

One young teenage girl asked me (mind you after giving her a lesson and spending an hour with her and her friend on their mare and geling)... "What is a Mare?"

And then one of the owners of a rather nasty horse I retrained said that the horse must like me and like to back up since she wags her tail whenever I back her up. LOL