Funniest Things A City Slicker Has Ever Said To You?

[PotterWatch]

 

[MorticiaChick]

Hi everyone, I usually just read these forums, but can't resist adding this one to this particularly amusing thread.
A friend works for animal control and received a call from a city woman (new to the suburbs) SCREAMING about a herd of long eared MULES in her backyard. He calmly explained that we don't have mules roaming the neighborhood and that she is looking at deer. Nastily she replied that she was a mature, college educated, intelligent woman who KNEW what a deer was and that he MUST get over there and get this herd off of her lawn.
Sure enough, he went over with a pamphlet or something on deer and had to show her what deer really looked like.
She was speechless...and we all laugh about it!

 

[TheOLDNewChick]

Quote:


Don'tcha know they get swimming lessons?

 

[estpr13]

This is not chicken related and may catch a few of you.

I have a great aunt who has a double cousin who looks almost exactly like her. When they are together people assume that they are identical twins. And have all their lives.

On one family get together I had to explain that they were not identical twins but were infact double cousins. And then had to explain what double cousins were. Perhaps my explanation was poor... but this is how I explained it.

Double cousins occur when two siblings from one flamily each marry one of two siblings from another family and each couple has children. The resulting children are more like brothers and sisters than cousins hence the name double cousins. And that is why they look like identical twins.

The puzzled look and reply was, "So, did all four siblings share the same bed?"

Uhhh... no. Not even the same house.

 

[SportTees]

This stuff is hilarious !!

I don't have any stories but my mom thinks I'm doomed to have bird flu and get some unexplained illness since I have chickens - I ask her what she thinks comes on a chicken sandwich shes eating?

 

[Tlayel]

A lady came over to my house to pick some cherries from my tree. After picking a few and eating them she said these are so good ... are they fresh?

 

[ChevygirlBeth]

Quote:
I am a double cousin! My double cousin is a year and a half younger than me, but we do look similar. We've had to explain how it worked to people all of our lives. Sometimes people think we've lost it, but I never had a response like the one you posted! lol.

 

[fernandez0067]

When I first got chickens I was at a family party and it was the topic of the hour. Everyone wanted to know everything... and they were so amazed.

I asked around to see if anyone wanted some eggs I had a bunch and I brought them with me.

My uncle says " Are they safe to eat? How do you get them pasturized? "

 

[emmalynn]

How can you tell which one is the dwarf tree?

It's the short one!

 

[sunnychooks]

I've posted this story before, but it fits into this thread so well that I'll repeat it.
I had a man buy some eggs from me whose wife was from the city. He came back to get more and told me that when he brought the eggs home his wife said, "You can't eat those! They aren't "hominized!".
Yes, that's exactly the pronunciation she used.