Got in a fight today...am i wrong?

[TheDuckCrew]

One of my last two ducks was killed this weekend, and on monday, a kid made a comment about how ducks lives are valueless because "they won't grow up to be doctors and save the world." i became hysterical and was crying beyond control and i yelled at him. he apologized a couple minutes later, but it did not matter to me. the ducks are everything to me. today i was crying after talking to my math teacher about how he had no right to say i was being dumb about it. he told me to grow up after i said i was still mad at him for his comment. i could not hold back and i turned around and just lost it. i screamed at him saying he had no right to tell me to grow up, my ducks were everything to me. they meant more to me than my family. i'm not close to my family really, so the ducks are what i had. the principal came up behind us and told us she wanted to talk to us about it. she spent the next 20 minutes saying how i am not allowed to be upset because he apologized. thats like asking a mother bear not to attack what is hurting her cubs. i tried to explain that they were more than just ducks or more than just pets, that they ment everything to me. and she just continued to say that that did not matter, for the kid had apologized. i just can't believe it. no one cares to try and understand that they ARE everything to me, nothing less. i feel like it may have been wrong to yell, but there is no way i could restrain myself.

 

[DTchickens]

It happens, especially when people don't understand the situation due to not being around/owning them etc. It was rude of him to say, and i would say blowing up some is fine when he says it, i occasionally want to myself but don't. Once an apology is said i do usually let it go and believe you should too, holding on to it just because of one comment is a waste of energy and you especially don't want to make any "enemies'.

 

[Goose and Fig]

Well- you may have over-reacted a little bit, but you're grieving- so I can see where you're coming from.

Sorry for your loss

 

[The Chicken Lady]

Think of the kid as trolling... You know how people online sometimes say things just to get a reaction so they can sit back and laugh at everyone freaking out?

I'm going to be honest, my dear, because I care for you and because I see these same things happen with the kids at school where I teach. He put out some bait and you took it. Now, it will get around the school about how you reacted and other kids may try the same thing -- just so that they can watch you react and be entertained by it. It's cruel, but true; some kids are twisted that way. They get their entertainment by watching others in pain because then they have an excuse not to deal with whatever pain they have personally.

The next time someone says something rude to you about your ducks, ignore them or walk away, or tell them (in a level, calm voice), "Thanks, but your opinion doesn't matter to me." If you ignore them, they'll find someone else to pick on. You can't change these kinds of kids; either they'll grow up and mature out of their bullying, or they'll grow up into weak-minded, bullying adults. The best thing to do is show them that they can't hurt you or make you react. No reaction hurts a bully worse than NOT responding to them.

 

[horsejody]

We understand. The only problem was probably that you were shouting in school. The other kid is a jerk, or at least he was at that moment. At this point, all he can do is apologize. If this person normally acts in such an uncaring manner, avoid him. He's not worth the grief. When you are calmer, remind him that he probably won't become a doctor and save the world either. Life has value. Pets are loved. It's as simple as that. Some people are too small minded to understand the concept.

I'm very sorry for your loss. I hope that you get more ducks.

 

[miss_jayne]

yep. you were wrong. you were at school and you need to follow the rules. bottom line.

as frustrated or angry as you might feel or may be, you still need to keep it together.

sorry that you are feeling this way, it is unfortunate. there is a way you can restrain yourself. use self-control. everyone has it, you have to CHOOSE to use it. only YOU can close your mouth. saying you cannot is an excuse. if he hit you and said he couldn't restrain himself, you'd being singing a different tune. only you are in control of you.

his advice to you was excellent.

 

[b.hromada]

Quote:

 

[seismic wonder2]

You lost your composure,
You lost control of the situation,
You lost the "fight"

NEVER give the other guy the power to make you loose control.
Words only have the power YOU give them. Keep your power to your self...then THEY loose.




Then kick him in the hoo ha.

 

[TheDuckCrew]

Quote:
thank you

ive just been bullied for years and now i have the confidence to stand up for myself, i always let them keep torturing me to tears everyday. but its even different with my ducks, i was walking out of school, school was over and then he tells me to grow up after i'm already in tears. the rules didn't matter to me, especially since school was over, the only thing that mattered was my ducks. i would fight for them until my dying breath.

 

[1stepcloser]

Quote:
That...and yes, you overreacted. Learn from the moment so it won't happen next time...and there will be a next time. (There will always be at least one jerk looking to get a reaction out of you.)