Granny's gone and done it again

[twisted-acres-farm]

 

[twisted-acres-farm]

 

[twisted-acres-farm]

and last BUT my Favorite

 

[Wishing4Wings]

I’ve come up with 25 things to do, some are simple like hot chocolate, popcorn, etc. Some are interactive (bake cookies, family game night, open a gift). And some focus outward, like volunteer, donate, visit relatives, etc. I’m hoping it works and is something we can do in the future.

Such a wonderful idea! They will love it! You could even make a treasure map to find something that won't fit, like a new family game.

 

[twisted-acres-farm]

HOW TO START A FIGHT





One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery

plot as a Christmas gift...

The next year, I didn't buy her a gift.

When she asked me why, I replied,

"Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"

And that's how the fight started.....

______________________________ __



My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A

Millionaire while we were in bed.

I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?'

'No,' she answered.

I then said, ‘Is that your final answer?'

She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes..'

So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

And that's when the fight started...

______________________________ __



I took my wife to a restaurant.

The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

"I'll have the rump steak, rare, please."

He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"

"Nah, she can order for herself."

And that's when the fight started.....

______________________________ _



My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school

reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging

his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.

I asked her, "Do you know him?"

"Yes", she sighed,

"He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since."

"My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"

And then the fight started...

______________________________ __



When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept

hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always

had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat, making beer. Always something more important to me. Finally she

thought of a clever way to make her point.

When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time

and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, "When you finish cutting the grass,

you might as well sweep the driveway."

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

______________________________



My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.

She asked, "What's on TV?"

I said, "Dust."

And then the fight started...

______________________________ __



My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.

She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 165 in about 2 seconds."

I bought her a bathroom scale.

And then the fight started......

______________________________



After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security.

The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age.

I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.

So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.

She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability too.'

And then the fight started...

______________________________ __



My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.

She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,

"I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'

I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."

And then the fight started........

______________________________ __



I rear-ended a car this morning...the start of a REALLY bad day!

The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!

He looked up at me and said 'I am NOT Happy!'

So I said, 'Well, which one ARE you then?'

That's how the fight started

 

[Wishing4Wings]

and last BUT my Favorite

Even the dog is laughing!

 

[CapricornFarm]

Hey, i was wearing shorts today!
I got a good start on the raised bed, and planted 2 bushes. I need to go shopping soon to get the rest of the stuff i need to finish.
Dragged a bunch of dead wood into a pile , collected kindling and fired it up. This is what some of these areas look like we are cleaning up.

 

[campingshaws]

Such a wonderful idea! They will love it! You could even make a treasure map to find something that won't fit, like a new family game.

I found teensy playing cards for the “game night” boxes. A full deck!

 

[twisted-acres-farm]

Hey, i was wearing shorts today!
I got a good start on the raised bed, and planted 2 bushes. I need to go shopping soon to get the rest of the stuff i need to finish.
Dragged a bunch of dead wood into a pile , collected kindling and fired it up. This is what some of these areas look like we are cleaning up.View attachment 1199469

good lord what a tangled mess.

That's one bad case of "bed head" your property has.

 

[Wishing4Wings]

I found teensy playing cards for the “game night” boxes. A full deck!
View attachment 1199471

That's going to be a big hit!!