Granny's gone and done it again

[Nomadicus]

Speak for yourself, old timer! I am a spry 71!

You are only as old as your aches and pains tell you that you are.

 

[BigBlueHen53]

You are only as old as your aches and pains tell you that you are.

And today ... I have none!
I'm watching the Olympics.

 

[Nomadicus]

About 6:15pm the radar says a big storm cell will open right on top of us. Looks like the chicken rounds will get made early today. Right now I need to get out and check on a few of them. One especially. Flopsie didn't make coop check last night. Her coop had to be closed up without her well after dark. She was out and sassy this morning acting like she had a good time out partying with the girls all night long. I know better. She was hiding out and tonight I'm going to be watching her. She is an Ancona and they rarely go broody but it is possible as she has hidden her eggs lately. She is one if the pets that free ranges during the day. She and her buddy Speckles with their guardian rooster Jerry Lee who looks after the outdoor broody kids too. Jerry Lee is a Delaware boy who sometimes decides to roost with the little boys and girls. He does hang with them during the day when they are out and looks after them. He taught them all about what the roosting bars are for and to use them instead of huddling down low on the shavings. He will normally let me pick him up if he is on a perch where I can walk up to him and give him a belly massage. I think he is kind of embarrassed if the girls see him getting special attention. I may have time for another short nap but I really need to see if I can get an ox out of the ditch. Actually the John Deere garden boy is in the ditch with the mower belt off. If we get this storm before I mow over the septic system I'll need a farm tractor to bale it when it dries. It hasn't been mowed for 2 weeks. Y'all be good now. Don't let me have all the fun.

 

[Nomadicus]

And today ... I have none!
I'm watching the Olympics.

Old posts live forever on the web...

 

[Nomadicus]

Our radar forecast has changed and now it shows not a drop coming our way. I can chill the rest of the day and just be up early in the morning and get started with the mower problem. It feels good to be a slacker today.

 

[Nomadicus]

I am hoping Granny and Tom are OK.

 

[CapricornFarm]

And thanks for sharing this post here in the Granny's chat for all of us and we are glad to have you and welcome you to post at any time here. This is a friendly bunch of young and old but I think the most are on the old side like I am. We do like to have a lot of fun in this thread as well as share our concerns for each other. and occasionally get a crack a few good jokes. Where's Twist when you need him for a joke?

Probably the sucker chair got him !

 

[h2oratt]

I am hoping Granny and Tom are OK.

They are probably sleeping

 

[Granny Hatchet]

My jaw dropped yall
An old couple had been together for many years. There was only one friction in their relation after all these years, being that the man always had the habit of farting really loud just after waking up.
Because of the ‘noise’ his wife then wakes up and start complaining about the smell making her grasp for air and her eyes becoming watery. Every day she would plead with him to stop doing that every morning because it was making her sick to the stomach.
He just said that he couldn’t help it and it was a normal natural thing that can happen to everybody. She asked him to please see a doctor, because she was afraid that he would blow out his guts one day.
As the years went by, the man didn’t stop ripping them out. But then, one Christmas morning, while she was preparing dinner for that Christmas evening, while he was still upstairs and sound asleep, she had a good look at the turkeys innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the other ‘spare parts of the turkey and came up with a malicious idea.
She took the turkey guts and placed them in a bowl. She took the bowl up where her man was still sound asleep. She pulled back the covers and then carefully pulled back the elastic waistband of her husbands underpants. She then emptied the bowl with turkey guts into his shorts making sure she didn’t wake him up…
Some time later she heard that her husband woke up with his daily routine of trumpeting. But this time it was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of him running to the bathroom…
The woman could hardly control herself from laughing out loud while she was rolling on the floor with tears in her eyes from laughter. She reckoned that after years of his torture she finally got him back real good.
After about 25 minutes later, the husband came down the stairs with a look of horror on his now grey face while his underpants were covered with blood. She asked him, while she bit her lips, what happened to you hunny?
Well honey, he said, you were right all along. You’ve been warning me all these years but I didn’t listen to you. What do you mean? she asked. Well he said; you always said that one day I would end up with my guts out because of the farting right? She said yes and?
Well, he continued; you were completely right and today it really happened! The wife said; then we should go to a doctor as soon as possible then. The man replied; don’t worry my dear, cause by the grace of God, with some Vaseline and two fingers I managed to get most of them back in!

 

[Granny Hatchet]

Will he let you take him to ER

I told him I am taking him tomorrow.

I am hoping Granny and Tom are OK.

Tom is NOT ok. slept all day today too. He cant walk and can only stand for a min or so. Kevin was here and helped me get him off the toilet but even with a water pill he only peed 2xs today. He also has pus in his leg. Im dreading this . I can barely walk myself.