Grief group

[Muser]

I hear you all. I am so sorry @sparklez for the loss of your baby girl

I've owned chickens for just over a year now and I rear them straight run from chicks. Culling off Roos was really alot harder than I thought it was going to be. I had bonded with two Roos the first year and because they were both Barnyard mutt birds no one wanted to rehome them. So I had to make a descision, I could only keep one. After a few months, the Roo I chose turned into a monster and I ended up culling him too. I always felt I made the wrong choice. I've put myself in the dilema again, I have a small chick who's becoming my favourite and it looks to be a Roo. So I'm keeping it for now and hopefully he/she will be a little darling, but damn it's really hard when they become so friendly.

Not lost any chickens to predators (yet, hopefully never) so I can't imagine how stressful and upsetting that is when you find them carnage left behind. You learn their little personalities and it must be such a shock when you don't expect it to happen.

 

[BigBlueHen53]

I lost one of my favorite chickens last night to a fox. She had so much personality, was such a pretty hen too, and was too young. There were several preventable factors that led to it. I went shopping before dusk, thought my husband was checking on and locking up the coop, he thought i put them in when i left. I had just opened and left open our overgrown garden fence, there was pile of tomato cages near the opening leaning on the fence (that i have been meaning to bring in). This chicken got stuck in the garden, couldn't find her way out or to go around the tomato cages, it got dark, she never went into the coop with the others an a fox came and got it her. I am so upset, i feel so guilty. The other 9 girls are fine, today they seem normal, maybe a little quiet so far this morning. I am a lot more upset than i thought i would be. I was also looking for support, i don't think many people can understand how much love a chicken can hold in your heart. How do you all deal with grieving a chicken and not feeling so guilty.

It's so hard... I know. Why it always seems to be a favorite, who knows. All I can tell you is, there is not a soul here on BYC that has not been where you are, who has not felt what you're feeling. Our chickens are precious to us, they are sweet and vulnerable and depend on us, and we aim to do right by them, to protect them, come what may ... and then there is that day when our defenses fail and a dog gets in or a chicken gets left out somehow, or a raccoon or a snake or, or ... and we are devastated and there is no fixing what is broken. Please try to forgive yourselves and each other, to know that you and your DH did the best you could but these things happen ... and in future you will check and double check and communicate better and by God's good grace it won't happen again.

 

[BigBlueHen53]

I have made plenty of mistakes too that I have felt guilty about. I always learn something new. Depending on where you live and how much space you have and how many chickens and how big they are; can you bring them in the house for a while? I bought a dog kennel cage and when I have a sick chicken I need to keep an eye on i bring them in the house to better take care of them..That way it might help you reassess maybe you just need to move the location of your coop.

If you suspect mites, absolutely do not bring the chickens into your house!

 

[sparklez]

I hear you all. I am so sorry @sparklez for the loss of your baby girl

I've owned chickens for just over a year now and I rear them straight run from chicks. Culling off Roos was really alot harder than I thought it was going to be. I had bonded with two Roos the first year and because they were both Barnyard mutt birds no one wanted to rehome them. So I had to make a descision, I could only keep one. After a few months, the Roo I chose turned into a monster and I ended up culling him too. I always felt I made the wrong choice. I've put myself in the dilema again, I have a small chick who's becoming my favourite and it looks to be a Roo. So I'm keeping it for now and hopefully he/she will be a little darling, but damn it's really hard when they become so friendly.

Not lost any chickens to predators (yet, hopefully never) so I can't imagine how stressful and upsetting that is when you find them carnage left behind. You learn their little personalities and it must be such a shock when you don't expect it to happen.

I can't have roosters where I am and one ended up being this most beautiful rooster. I luckily found someone to take him before he really started crowing and this person wanted to keep him and breed him and named him. So that was great. It's amazing how attached these common animals can get to you and what a hold they have on your heart!

 

[sparklez]

It's so hard... I know. Why it always seems to be a favorite, who knows. All I can tell you is, there is not a soul here on BYC that has not been where you are, who has not felt what you're feeling. Our chickens are precious to us, they are sweet and vulnerable and depend on us, and we aim to do right by them, to protect them, come what may ... and then there is that day when our defenses fail and a dog gets in or a chicken gets left out somehow, or a raccoon or a snake or, or ... and we are devastated and there is no fixing what is broken. Please try to forgive yourselves and each other, to know that you and your DH did the best you could but these things happen ... and in future you will check and double check and communicate better and by God's good grace it won't happen again.

Yes absolutely. I'm trying to look on the positives now, grateful of the memories of her, that I have 9 healthy hens still, a secure coop, and that we get to have chickens at all and give them a great life. Since many do not get that. And hopefully that stinkin fox and her family had a good meal but only one from us!

 

[BigBlueHen53]

Yes absolutely. I'm trying to look on the positives now, grateful of the memories of her, that I have 9 healthy hens still, a secure coop, and that we get to have chickens at all and give them a great life. Since many do not get that. And hopefully that stinkin fox and her family had a good meal but only one from us!

That's a great attitude!

 

[Bawkbok]

I lost one of my favorite chickens last night to a fox. She had so much personality, was such a pretty hen too, and was too young. There were several preventable factors that led to it. I went shopping before dusk, thought my husband was checking on and locking up the coop, he thought i put them in when i left. I had just opened and left open our overgrown garden fence, there was pile of tomato cages near the opening leaning on the fence (that i have been meaning to bring in). This chicken got stuck in the garden, couldn't find her way out or to go around the tomato cages, it got dark, she never went into the coop with the others an a fox came and got it her. I am so upset, i feel so guilty. The other 9 girls are fine, today they seem normal, maybe a little quiet so far this morning. I am a lot more upset than i thought i would be. I was also looking for support, i don't think many people can understand how much love a chicken can hold in your heart. How do you all deal with grieving a chicken and not feeling so guilty.

I'm so sorry for your loss. It is never easy to lose a pet chicken, especially so traumatically. I cry beyond what I think is reasonable with each chicken loss.
Release the guilt. Don't blame hubby. It was miscommunication. I've learned to not ask hubby to do something for me for the hens, I claim all responsibility for their care. Although he does make a great vet tech when I need assistance in administering.
Focus on the other 9 and be grateful they are all ok. It helps to hug a chicken. Sending Hugs.

 

[Jlwennerberg9]

Hi as everyone knows as long time chicken owners it is inevitable that eventually we lose our babies I lost 10 to death and 6 I had to adapt out. I joined a free grief group online but it seems no one besides me has lost chickens. Everyone else talks about dogs and cats..I was wondering if anyone knew of a free grief group online for chickens..thanks

A week ago today I lost one of my 5 month old pullets. She was the sweetest baby, my friend, and my favorite girl. I hand fed her via dropper while she was just a tiny chick because she became so weak from coccidiosis. She recovered after being treated and thrived from that moment on.

She was the friendliest of all my girls, greeted me whenever I approached, and never missed an opportunity to cuddle. I had a bond with her like none other. Losing her has been beyond difficult for me and I have begun the process of looking for support groups. Unfortunately, like you mention, there's not a lot out there for those of us that are mourning the loss of a chicken. Most people only view them as farm animals or food. But to me, all of my girls are my pets and part of the family. I've actually been nervous to reach out for support since I know most people would probably laugh at me for grieving over a chicken. But they are no different to me than a dog, horse, or cat and they have changed my life for the better.

I did come across this website https://bitchinchickens.com/2024/06/11/bitchin-chickens-memes-42-grief-loss/ which has helped me in the last week and reading quotes about grief and the grieving process have also comforted me. I'd be happy to chat with you whenever and I hope you are doing better.