Has anyone here ever felt so frustrated with the churches around them?

[Smartie_Pants]

I am so frustrated! I've only attended two churches long-term in my life. I have been saved, but not baptised because neither church ever felt comfortable to me. As I ask around, I realize that most of the baptist churches in this area tend to be very similar.

The people try to run the church, and it never feels like the people are there for God and God alone. At one church I went to (a BAPTIST church!), the girls weren't allowed to wear any type of shorts, even kapris, because the pastor said so. They were very uptight, and everything was about criticising yourself and not about celebrating our love for God and his love for us. I always felt sad when I left, and that's not what church should be like.

Another church ended up SPLITTING because of CARPET! They were recarpeting around the pews and the pullpit, and one side wanted one color and the other side wanted another. How petty is that?

They also tend to be VERY cliqey, to the point where the people in the youth group wouldn't even talk to me, at all. When I would talk to them, they acted like I was wasteing their time. The night I got saved, no one besides the youth group leaders and my best friend even said anything to me!


I just feel so frustrated at not being able to find a church that truely clicks with me and my beliefs! I believe 100% in God, and I want him to be proud of me and I believe that he is, I just wish I could have that time to praise him and to learn more from someone who had studied the Bible extensively.

How did you find a church that was right for you? Has anyone else ever been in a situation like this?

Today I was reading about St. Francis and how he believed that God was all around us, in everything he created. St. Francis believed in peace with all people, no matter your differences, and always being humble and appreciative for the things you have. Why aren't there churches that still uphold those values and use church for what it really is, praising God and learning about him?

I don't know, maybe its just the area I live in. People here are VERY racist, to the point I actually heard DOZENS of people saying they hoped Obama would be killed, when he was elected. One of the biggest KKK compounds is here, and it all spills over into my school too. The black kids and the rednecks tried to stage a big group fight last year! They are also very judgemental, trying to tell everyone else what they are doing wrong when they are doing something far worse, and everyone is trying to outdo each other so they can say they are better than someone else. I think that has to cloud their religious practices too.


Well, thanks for letting me rant and thanks for any advice you can give me.

 

[redhen]

I dont believe you even need a church to praise your God..he hears you either way. Dosent he? A Church is just a building made of brick and wood..IMO Good luck with your beliefs.

 

[Emzyyy]

I couldn't be of any help I don't go to church and prob won't ever they make me feel uncomfortable because I admit it I really don't know much about God I've never read the Bible and have never really prayed, and its odd when 4 year old knows more than you.

 

[Thomas423]

Pray that the Lord will lead you to the right church. He always provides.
On another note. The Baptist church that I go to is alot like you describe but it is a good "meat and potatoes" church. In other words, the written Word is taught and that is most important to me. Yes, there are many hyprocrats but I don't really care as much about them as I do the Word. Now, my DD (almost 16) on the other hand does not really care for the youth group kids and has chosen to attend a different Baptist church about 15 mins from our home. Because it is important for her to have fellowship with her peers, I prayed about it and now I drive her there every Sun. morning and Wed evening. She has really flourished there and has grown spiritually.
Do pray and trust that the Lord will provide you with the right church.

 

[Mahonri]

You are young, but I commend you for striking out on your spiritual journey.

You know Jesus is your Savior. That is the most important thing!

Find a church where folks are doing the works of Jesus and you will be happy.

Find one that can help you to come to know who you really are.... one that can explain how we came here to this earth, why we are here and where we will go when this mortal journey ends.

God bless you as you persue your spiritual journey to Light and Truth.

Kind regards,

Mahonri

 

[Blackbird]

I can so relate. My family is Catholic, and there are two main churches that we usually go to, that have the same priest usually. In the larger church everything is about trying to meet certain standards, what to wear, how to look, all that. My family doesn't have the greatest last name so we don't fit in well there. When we enter the church almost everyone stares at us like we don't belong. I had one woman glare at me all throughout the service because she thought my hair was too long. The majority of the people are very unfriendly hypocrites that thrive on gossip and have the whole 'houlier than though' attitude. The smaller church is a bit better, but still not what I would want. Our last priest told my mother that she wouldn't go to heaven because she was a convert (not that she enjoys church anyway), wouldn't pray for farmers, and sweared during the sermons. Needless to say I don't go to either, and am on the verge of being Pagan instead.

Just my expirience.

 

[bigkford]

Quote:
Redhen, you are beautiful just like my Dad was. {Sorry he passed away 4 yrs ago,beautibul man} he always taught us everything in this world God created. You can sit in your home, backyard, anywhere and appreciate what God did for us. The religions out and about are the preacher or whatevers opinion on what their interpretation of the Bible is. You have to read it yourself and make your own opinion. It is how everyone does it unless your a follower. Yes you need guideness on things you don't understand, but that comes from many different places and time living. Good Luck finding something

 

[saddina]

I'm going to gently suggest that alot of organized churches are rather clannish and anytime you involve people in a group there will be in-fighting, gossipping and those who ruin the experiance for others. Since you already know the two you've attended are not what you want, it may be time to look elsewhere. Remeber some of the ugliest wars are fought over who's church/god is right, and that people assume that since you attend service with them you think like them.

Good luck finding something that suits you dear.

 

[Blackbird]

I find myself agreeing with Redhen, Bigfork, and Saddina.

If you can't find church thats not too far away that you like, I suggest designating a corner of your room or something for prayer, etc. I know some people have specific alters for patron saints, candles, their bibles, and other religious related items. Just because other people might not be around and there isn't a priest doesn't mean that it cannot be just as special. As long as your heart is in the right place (or place where you want it), all should be good.

 

[Smartie_Pants]

Thanks you guys. You've really made me feel better. One of my friends went to that second church I was talking about for like 13 years, Sundays and Wednesdays, now she hasn't gone in weeks. Actually, after I left she told me that slowly almost everyone in the youth group stopped coming. Now, there are only like four teens, there used to be like 14. That should tell them something. I'm thinking of asking her to go to some of the other churches around town and try them out with me.