Homeschooling groups rant. Very frustrated

[elizabethbinary]

Religion is such a deeply personal thing I don't think I'd even trust a person willing to sign their beliefs like that. It says to me they fold their beliefs up under the quickest hint of pressure, in religious circles (or at least, in my own self). I can see how signing something like that would show the opposite what you wanted to your children. I commend you for trying to find another way to teach your children what values you find important - and being so firm on them.

I don't know much about the topic at hand, so I'm just going to wish you well and good luck! I'll pray you find the perfect solution.

 

[chickened]

Now I won't get to religious on anyone but does it not say for Christians that "Therefore there is now no condemnation for those..." and that covers a lot. I would not consider it a lie but as some suggest a questionable thing in which in those areas it would be up to the person to do or not do it as a liberty issue meaning if you think it is wrong then don't do it but I may think it is OK. After all what is a sin without a penalty are they going to excommunicate you? or burn you at the stake? just sign the stupid paper and move on if they require it.

mom'sfolly :

I'm finding it interesting that several people are recommending signing a "testament of faith" that makes the OP uncomfortable. Unless I'm seriously misunderstanding the what people are saying, it seems to me that OP is being advised to lie. I admire the OP's integrity in not signing something like that to belong to a homeschool group. It seems to be that she might also have concerns about schooling her children in a group that dictates other's beliefs in such a way. I think that no matter my faith, I would feel uncomfortable in that sort of situation as well.

I hope you find a group that works for you. I have no interest in homeschooling, but I understand how having a group to school with would be nice.​

 

[Momagain1]

I just want to clarify; MY reasonings were MY reasonings; and should never be read as into them being hers...or pushed off as hers..
I know you didnt state specifically me and you werent really saying anyone in particular; I just wanted to put that out there...
giving my personal reasons for choosing homeschooling and then comparing it to HS'ing groups etc...and that I knew that
it was super hard to find ppl/groups in your same realm of belief w/o being too far out there..

 

[dandelionheart]

Sorry if I'm repeating anything that has already been said... I admit I haven't read all the previous posts.

But in Indiana it doesn't have to be all or nothing, you can have your kid enrolled for a limited amount in public school, like 4 hrs a day and then homeschool the rest of the time. You may want to just have a sit down with the public school people. See what your options are then.

Also, if you feel weird signing that contract, chances are the others did too. Maybe the contract was just something the original person wanted and isn't the consensus of the group... Any chance at just getting them to drop it? Band with some other parents that would join if that contract thingy wasn't there OR some parents you know that are in it but just signed the stupid thing our of irritation?

For you parents doing what is best for your kids.

 

[ChikeeMomma]

Just wondering about the testament of faith paper -- Is it in depth that you all should believe this certain way? Or is it letting you know these are the ideals, morals, etc. that the group adheres to? The Lutheran preschool that my daughter went to had paperwork that you signed so that you understood that is a Christian based school (and that the teachings were in the Lutheran way). It did ask if we were Christian (which we are, but not under the Lutheran denomination). I do not believe, though, that if you weren't you had any issue. There were children there whose parents weren't a "practicing" Christian (my point with that is -- if you didn't have a church you belonged to, there was absolutely no issue). If you were interested in the Christian group, could you go to a couple of times and then decide if you want to take part?

 

[Mac in Wisco]

Many have already touched on this, but people home school for many different reasons and many have very strong convictions about what they teach and whom they associate with. So, perhaps a home school group is not what you need. There are many other youth activities where they can make friends. Sports, Scouting, 4-H, YMCA programs, swim lessons, etc. Our area has youth shooting sports at the rod and gun clubs. There are number of weekend activities through different agencies; local universities and tech colleges, county ag extension services, alternative agriculture groups, county and state parks all have different activities going on, anything from bird, butterfly, and bug watching, to arts and crafts, etc. Just get out there and let the kids be kids and have fun. They'll find friends along the way.

 

[7isheaven]

Hi Heather,

I'm a jean wearing occasional cussin' Christian homeschooler.* I've joined this forum because we are hatching eggs for our homeschooling science project. I always find a forum for whatever I'm doing.

Don't give up hope looking. They are out there. Are you on any national forums? Like homeschooltv or homeschoolhub? Maybe you'll find locals on there. . .

My first thought was to clarify the 'statement of faith.' I'm involved in 2 different groups that require signing one. The purpose of the statement is to keep the original nature of the group even as people change, come and go. Especially in one instance where the local group is very well known- we want it's reputation to stay stable- regardless of the ever changing membership. Neither group requires that one agrees with the statement to join- just that you've read it and understand the basis for the Group. "Group A" is a support group and non-agreerers would not be eligible for the board. Group B is an oversight option to comply with our state laws, non-agreerers would not be 'reviewers.' I know that many non-Christians think that these groups are not 'inclusive,' but it's simply not true. Non believers certainly could join if they wanted. They are not any less inclusive than the secular unschooling groups in our area, just more honest and upfront about it. Basically, people like to fit in and be around 'like minded people.' So the secular group calls itself 'inclusive' yet if you don't align pretty well with the organizers, you won't stick around. [1.8 kids, GWS follower, leans left, unschooler, probably vegan too] Christian groups could simply do the same thing I suppose, but they tend to be more formally organized and in my limited experience, more stable. I avoided the 'Christian" group for a long while because of the 'talk' about the forced statement and rigidness. Eventually, I realized that 'those people' were not so rigid as they appeared and in fact I got along pretty famously with most of them. [not all, just like any group]. And I discovered that the statement was a very basic, 'We believe in these three things' AND you did not HAVE to agree with it.

If the group in question really does require that you agree- would they let you cross off the parts you don't? Kind of like when you sign a medical document and you cross or fill in certain things? [Can't think of any examples, but vaccine paperwork and "birth plans' come to mind, lol]

Consider starting your own group. It does not have to be big. Heavily advertise among the groups.

Any way, just ignore me, it's okay, I realize you wanted to rant. It is frustrating sometimes. Homeschoolers tend to be an independent bunch in general and once they're cozy! yikes! I've come to discover that Relationship building and maintaining is hard work.

And I thought I'd only have to work on my marriage! sheesh. Instead, I have to nurture a bunch of friendships too and help my kids with theirs. It's worth it though because for me, why else are we here? I feel like the 'getting along' being a friend to others is one of our great purposes here on Earth. and so not really optional.

blessings,

deborah
*I'm my way out for a drink and some karaoke w/o the kids. . . Bible study tomorrow night, ya know.

homeschooling since 1991, only 15 more years to go! yippee!
http://homeisthemagicingredient.blogspot.com/

 

[HeatherLynn]

The testament of faith itself I guess I have no issue with. Its the signing of one. Like a contract I guess. It just gives me a bad feeling. In signing it I would not be lying really. I do agree with what is said, I guess I just feel like it is legalistic in a sense. I can't explain it. I have read it several times and have been tempted to just give in but it just gives me a bad feeling in my stomach. I am not the most trusting with churches so maybe thats part of it. No clue. The testament of faith essentially has points that you say you agree with and believe and that you will live according to those beliefs. Then you sign at the bottom. Again its not so much I disagree with the sentiments. If we were chit chatting I would be agreeing with them. Its the whole signing it thats weirds me out. For me my faith is not linked to anyone or a church at all. I am not dependent on any outside support or confirmation. Its all very very personal to me and I guess its something I guard. My faith was affected by a church and people before so now I am very careful with it I guess. This just seems to cross the boundaries of that and it really does strike me as letter of the law, not spirit of Gods law. If that makes sense. I am probably just weird.

I started homeschooling mostly because of the state of the school system. I disagree with some things being taught now. There was no way in heck I was going to let the public school ever do sex ed with my kids. I have taken care of that subject and they probably received better and more accurate information than any school could offer. I am very upfront and honest about this because I feel the only protection I can offer them in that subject is information. If they know what they will really be facing I think they will come out better than most. On that one just about everyone, secular and Christian have acted somewhat appalled. They were pretty young ( 7 or so when they first asked because I was pregnant and they ask too many questions) when the talking started and I guess its an ongoing thing as they ask questions. I just was not going to lie about it. I also started because I had one child who was excelling but was being held back so he would not pass up the rest of the class and then getting in trouble because he could not sit for hours with nothing to do. I had another who was dyslexic and the school did not catch it. She was struggling and the only answer I got was to hold her back. I was told no one would even notice since she was so small. I continue to homeschool because honestly we love spending the time together. We would all miss each other a bit too much, we have such fun learning together. I have friends that cringe at that but it works for us. We are just all very close.

I am looking very carefully at various groups. We already have ballet and scouts and swimming this summer. I have looked into and downloaded applications for 4h for next school year( I think its too late this year). There is a youth conservation group through ducks unlimited my brother is affiliated with so that is under consideration. I am working hard at making sure they meet people and make friends. I guess my rant was more it would be nice, as a homeschooling family, to have the company of a couple other homeschooling families that are like minded. I personally feel that we are sorta this little island out here in the country. So far we have tried with one family who's children were awesome right until they starting having screaming, yelling, punching fits. Scared the beejesus out of the kids and they refused to go back. The other one my daughter was pushing for more time with had a teenage son who shared with me his deep desire to see people die in chains. I refused to go back on that one. I just keep praying for the mom and the little ones. Wow he was scary. I was ok being an island for a few months after those but its time to get over and try again I guess. I just needed to rant before I did so. Get it out of my system.

 

[dewey]

That's what I got from your post...that it wasn't about "lies", as some suggested, regarding the essentials of the creed's stated beliefs to be signed, rather, it seemed it was something you didn't care to put your signature to for the feeling of duress of the signature requirement's sake itself. I think that if one has newly discovered their freedom in Christ from a history of secular or religious legalism, that even any hint of legalism (whether religious or secular) can be a very sensitive issue as well it should be while one is still sensitive to what they've removed themselves from and while they grow in the freedom of the fullness of grace. If one is looking for that type of likeminded fellowship with others it's extremely hard to come by, maybe about 3-5%?? of what's out there. I'd say do what's within your understanding at this time. One person feels comfortable eating meat. another, vegetables only, for conscience sake. I'd say to continue to do what leaves you with a clear conscience right now and the rest should eventually fall into place. All the best to you.

 

[Sierra pachie bars]

Two of three of my kids are on CAVA . Which is like a homeschool but its not. They go to classes and do work online. I love it, and almost all the kids in the area are on the same program. I went on it because the public school gave us alot of problems with my daughter being sick. They had her on a 504 plan at school but it just didn't work. Just keep looking you'll find people like you. Seems like you would fit in great in my neighborhood

I am glad to see more kids home schooled. Some of the things going on and learned nowadays. I about passed out when my 9 year old learned at school what sex is. He is currently on home hospital , because a horse fell on him so he's got metal rods in his leg. So they send a tutor to teach him at the house. But will also soon put him on the CAVA once he's off the home hospital.