If you care to hear the rants/troubles of a young adult.

Date sort Score sort
I have to second something that Royd said. Ride a bike. If you don't have or can't afford a bike then post on craigslist or get on a cycling forum and ask for some help. I can guarantee you that if someone were to go on one of the mountain bike or road bike forums that I frequent and ask for help getting a bike to get to and from work that the members would certainly make sure that it would happen.

I live 4.6 miles from work and commute regularly on my bike. My son who has a vision problem can't drive and he rides every day rain or shine, hot or cold. If you are willing to do that to get to and from a job then that shows a potential employer that you are a hard worker willing to do what it takes to get what you want.
 
If you are willing to do that to get to and from a job then that shows a potential employer that you are a hard worker willing to do what it takes to get what you want.

A bike is a great thing to try. Just to add a note though, some employers will specifically ask if you have a private vehicle, and you will not be hired if you answer 'no'. Some jobs also require the use of a private vehicle. Usually, if they are asking about it specifically, you will need to have a car or reliable access to a car.​
 
Quote:
This is what my son does and he even lives on his own. He uses public transportation and his bike or gives someone gas money when it's super nasty out or the bus isn't running. It's not always convienent but has taught a child with ADD (zero organizational skills) to plan ahead better than years of school has. He wants to eat and pay rent so he HAS to be motivated to get to work.
 
Have you considered missions work through your church in a foriegn country? I have a friend that did this back when he got out of high school that was in a similar situation not unlike yourself.

THere are thousands of students living off the free/loan money from the government. Don't worry about paying it back. (kidding).
 
Last edited:
I was thinking about you last night and thought I would suggest a couple of things.

You posted in a different thread where you wanted to apply, I know in other areas of the country grocery jobs are harder to get, but here in this part of CA and more this town, they are not so hard-union strike years ago dropped new wages to just about min wage after dues. Expect that they need help mornings, after school there are more high schoolers willing for those hours. Expect that you will have to start as a bagger/cart collector and not as a checker. If you know a neighbor that works in town or your sister hours and if she is willing to drop you off, use those hours as your preferred times. Expect to start by working in the 20-25 hours a week range. The grocery stores biggest days of the year are Thanksgiving, Super Bowl Sunday and Christmas. Make sure you do not ask for those days off when you are in an interview. Most stores do close for Christmas or have reduced hours.

My son, who rode his bike to work last night started as a bagger and is now a clerk, I do go pick him up and his bike because it is not safe to ride home in the dark or after midnight when he got off work (no street lights and 50+mph traffic). All 3 of my sons started their working careers at the same grocery store, one is now an assistant manager-at a different store and the other is on track to become an assistant manager at a different job. And they all also take college classes at the same time. They started working when they were 16 and while I wish they would save more, they have learned the value of their own money and what it means to pay bills (mean mom says you yak on the phone-you pay for the phone, etc)

As long as you live in your parents home with them supporting you, they are going to think of you as their dependent child and not as an adult even if the calendar says your are over 18. Like wise, it is still your moms house, even if there are 3 women over 18 living there. To change that view of you means taking the initiative and solving problems, like lack of transportation, on your own-but with guidance from your parents.
 
Just curious..... You mentioned that you were spending time in your room lately doing online Christmas shopping......how is this possible with no source of income? Isn't the topic your desire to get a job and the obstacles you face? So, how are you shopping?
 
Quote:
I could, but getting into debt is the last thing I want to do.

Just noticed your from NY. I say apply for every grant and scholarship you can. Start at a Community College and transfer to a University. If your grades are good enough you won't have a problem. My girls did and they're fine. Don't borrow for money to live on like credit cards and clothes and stuff. Focus on the long term goal of you degree.

I wish you well,

Rancher
 
Quote:
Just what planet do you live on to suggest a young girl ride a bike to work? As the father of three daughters I spent many a night worried for their lives. Just for good measure a Cell phone is no longer a luxury. It's a necessity. My DD's car broke down on the highway at night and I'm glad she had her phone. I drove like a mad man to get to her.

Things have changed and apparently some have not noticed it!

She didn't ask for advice but I'll give it anyhow since her mother sounds like mine. Talk to a social worker at school. See if you can get some counseling on how to deal with this situation, before it gets worse. If they decide to talk to your mother then so be it.

Verbal abuse is still abuse, and probably the most common. Period!

I wish you well,

Rancher

Apparently, the same planet as several others on this thread. I have known and known of many young adults, who quite enjoyed the life of coddling and irresponsibility, and parents who catered to it, without complaint. I got a set of cheap suitcases for my highschool graduation present.

Just because there are others who agree with you doesn't mean you are right. As for coddling I can understand that, but the OLD ways weren't the best ways. IMO it's not parents who coddle todays kids it's the rest of society.

I wanted my children to have the advantages I never had and the edge over your kids. Times have changed. While I used to go tricker treating by myself , it's just not wise anymore. For a girl to be riding a bike by herself or even with another friend is not safe. Nor is it for boys either. 1992 Sean Googin, Cazenovia , NY walking to meet his parents , from his job , never made it. They found his body in the lake. Only a fool would take such chances with their childs life.

Further more to suggest she have an adult talk with her mother is ridiculous. If she could muster up the courage to have such a talk, she'd be more mature than her mother. Which is why I suggested a Social Worker at school. Some parents follow the same vain they were brought up in. That doesn't make it right. Parents who use disparaging remarks as a means of getting their child to change are ignorant at best or fools at worst.

Nothing anyone here says can change my mind. I know when I'm right!
 
Quote:
Apparently, the same planet as several others on this thread. I have known and known of many young adults, who quite enjoyed the life of coddling and irresponsibility, and parents who catered to it, without complaint. I got a set of cheap suitcases for my highschool graduation present.

Just because there are others who agree with you doesn't mean you are right. As for coddling I can understand that, but the OLD ways weren't the best ways. IMO it's not parents who coddle todays kids it's the rest of society.

I wanted my children to have the advantages I never had and the edge over your kids. Times have changed. While I used to go tricker treating by myself , it's just not wise anymore. For a girl to be riding a bike by herself or even with another friend is not safe. Nor is it for boys either. 1992 Sean Googin, Cazenovia , NY walking to meet his parents , from his job , never made it. They found his body in the lake. Only a fool would take such chances with their childs life.

Further more to suggest she have an adult talk with her mother is ridiculous. If she could muster up the courage to have such a talk, she'd be more mature than her mother. Which is why I suggested a Social Worker at school. Some parents follow the same vain they were brought up in. That doesn't make it right. Parents who use disparaging remarks as a means of getting their child to change are ignorant at best or fools at worst.

Nothing anyone here says can change my mind. I know when I'm right!

Since you know you are right, what is her solution?

She is over 18, lives at home with her parents, has no job, no drivers lic, no car, no higher education, and considers herself an equal with her parents (in as far as she is an adult)
 
Her solution is to talk to a Social Worker at school. I'm not saying she'll get her way, Just some help in dealing with or accepting the situation. Some times children need an outside advocate and that should be another adult.
 

New posts New threads Active threads

Back
Top Bottom