I'm So Torn!!! :-( Update post 18

[KatyTheChickenLady]

I agree with terrielacy, but I have to ask; from where does it cost 4,500.00 to fly home?

 

[hollymh]

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We're in Guam, it cost $1400 per ticket and then there is about $300 in taxes and fees. It's stupidly over-priced.

 

[hollymh]

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Well, why do they think they get to decide how to spend your money? For all they know you put it into an IRA. Just because you "have" it doesn't mean you "have" to spend it.

Just do what YOU feel is right for you and your circumstances and don't worry about the rest.

That's my problem what feels right for me, I'm so confused about it! I really want to go home, but every time I think of spending that much money it makes me sick, literally physically sick! I’m losing sleep over it and I keep going back and forth, I’m just so torn! I wish our family would help pay but they won’t, my husband and I are afraid to even ask. His family is who we are afraid of, his mom got really upset with us when she found out we might not spend the money to come home to them.

 

[WriterofWords]

If she is that upset about not seeing you suggest she come to visit. Maybe if she sees how much it really costs she'll back off. Just because you got a bonus doesn't mean you have to spend it to go home. Put it in the bank, let it draw some interest and when you do go home next year take everyone a really nice extravagant present they could only get from Guam. Not only is it a lot of money to go home on, but the time spent in travel is miserable, the jet lag, the kids, the waiting in mulitple airports. Stay there, and firmly tell them that as much as you miss them and would like to see them, it will be next year.

 

[hollymh]

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See I can't win; it's not so much his family I care to see it's mine and my family cannot afford to fly to visit us. It's really not fair, his family came here to Guam in Feb. in fact they have told us “We spent the money to see you; you need to spend the money to see us" in so many words... That's my big problem, I want to see my family, but his is the one with the money who is telling us to come, my family, the one who doesn’t have ubber amounts of money to blow told me to stay here, that it was too much. I feel bad; I miss my family but geez that's a lot of money... It's like if it isnt one thing, it's another.

 

[WriterofWords]

my family, the one who doesn’t have ubber amounts of money to blow told me to stay here, that it was too much.

There is your answer.​

 

[NancyDz]

I agree, too much money ... just because they came doesnt mean you have to. They have a lot of money.. you don't that bonus can help you and your family in other ways. It's not fair for them to compare the two.

Or completely change it up and pay for your parents to come visit.... you'll get to see them, it will cost less than the 3 of you and you'll have an excuse not to go because you will have seen both sets of parents this year....