Is There Anybody Else Here With Aspberger's Syndrome?

[Widget]

This just gets better and better. The HR person was due to fly in this morning. So naturally we have a wonderful Nor'easter. Because of the weather she canceled her trip. I understand since it was a nasty storm. Heavy, wet snow and the driving was terrible this morning. But the flight from Philly she would have been on made it here without a problem.
Now I have to wait another few weeks to try for a meeting. The way things are going we'll probably be in the middle of a hurricane when she tries to get up here for the third time. Good thing I have a sense of humor about all this or I would really have a major meltdown. Not that I haven't been having one for the past week (for other reasons and not just this storm) but for the most part I've been able to function.
And yesterday at my weekly meeting with my boss he made the statement that if the HR person showed up that he had suggested the three of us meet. Not that he thought it would do any good. What? Hmmm. I know that HR and I both decided that getting my boss into a meeting was what needed to be done. But I will say he actually seems to be trying to work things out with me. He really is a nice guy just a bit clueless with being a supervisor.

 

[EweSheep]

Well, DD had a battery of tests done and I have not yet gotten all of the results in yet. However, I was surprised that they handed me to fill out the sheet for Asperger's, the usual questionnaires and ost of it was 2's and 3's as most observed.

What would that tell me?

Going to take a good while to get the results of the tests! I took her off of Incitiv which it does work on her some of the behaviorial issues but they told me she does NOT have ADD. If only I can understand why dd is having so much problems.

 

[GiddyMoon]

I was married to a man with undiagnosed Aspergers for ten years..how do I know? Because after many years of knowing something wasn't quite right (I worked with Autisitc teens in my high school years and saw something familiar) and finally having the courts remove him from the home for his mental and physical abusive nature/ neglect, 3 of our 4 kids were diagnosed being on the Autism spectrum. I kept hearing from him for years..the kids are just like me..my mom, my uncle, my brother..yea, no wonder their family life was always in such turmoil. Nobody would admit they needed help.


At that time my Asperger son started doing many studies and such at the Davis Mind Institute and I began a journey of finding out how common this is..very. The Autism gene / issues is very genetic. Skip forward 11 more years...I have been happily remarried for this time...the ex still struggles to keep his life together. Two BAs from a top university, 40k of loans on my credit to get him thru school, he is no farther ahead than he was when I met him when he was 27-over 20 years ago..no car, living in someone else's house, quitting his jobs every 2-3 years, always blaming it on other people, hiding his income and never paying any child support willingly...yet he can give sermons in his church..religion is his hyperfocus and he uses it to justify his behavior, in very odd ways. He fools a lot of people but over time people start seeing how things just do not add up in his behavior. I pray everyday I hope this is a day he finally admits he needs help.

The biggest thing I WISH I could get spectrum and non spectrum people to understand, YOUR SYMPTOMS OR THE SYMPTOMS OF THE PEOPLE YOU MAY KNOW DOES NOT MEAN EVERYONE ELSE WITH THESE ISSUES IS THE SAME, ACTS THE SAME NOR FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT THEIR AUTISM!


The best way I have learned to explain it..take 2 bowls, in one bowl you put pieces of paper with all the ways Autism / Aspegers can manifest itself , anti social, aggressive, lack of empathy, special skills or talents, hyper focus, lack of focus, slow to learn, fast to learn, and on and on..., along with the very common co-morbid issues like OCD, ODD, self medicating, addiction and more..and then in another bowl you put numbers 0-10 on the papers and then people reach in to pull out a handful. Everyone will get different issues, and everyone will have different degrees of severity of each issue.

I have been part of social groups, studies, seminars, etc for about 12 years now. My kids are 13-20., While some people are happy with their Aspergers, it doesn't mean it is easy on the people around them. I know many Asperger people oblivious to how their behavior tears their families up. And many Asperger people are not happy with it becuase it can and does severely limit their ability to function and understand the people around them.

"High functioning" is a very poor term. My 17 year old "high functioning" kid is more like an 8 year old in many ways.

While I know some happy Asperger people, and they are all very thankful to finally figure out what makes them unique, it is usually not a cup of tea UNLESS....they can see what they are up against and how their families have to work with it too.

I adore my kids and I am thankful they are so great..but with 4 kids, 3 diagnosed, I quit college to stay home and be here the last 10 years..and it was the best decision I ever made....and the Autism spectrum has caused a lot of issues in our life.

 

[EweSheep]

I know my husband has some kind of issues as well that are so similar in my daughters as well.

 

[Widget]

Quote:
Great description.

 

[EweSheep]

We went to another doctor, the one with PSY degree and he comfirmed my dd has anxiety, mild ADD and Aspberger's. Her brain waves are wonky and very fast even at a relaxed state. He advised me to get her back on her meds now because school is coming up and it would benefit her. I did ask him if it is something she has to take for the rest of her life and he said she does not need to take the meds for a long time, just enough to get her things under control. I took her off of the meds a week prior to the first test which the doctors at the hospital said she does NOT have ADD and does not need to be on meds. Well this doctor, an older one, with many many years of PSY testings and all levels of PSY symptoms in his background, under his recommendation that she needs to get back on it. So today is day ONE with Icinitiv 10 mg. I hated to medicate my daughter, we have work all summer to control her actions, her lack of empathy, a very strong personality and poor social skills and unrealistic fears just to "grandstand" or "drama queen" actions which I dismiss them as silly and didn't feed into it. she loves her pet chicken but literally torments the family cat and good thing at one time hubby caught her trapping the cat in the plastic tote box...if we didn't check on her for at least half an hour, we would have a dead cat. I tried to talk to her about putting animals in that situation by her improper actions, she would just laugh about it. No empathy, period. If something happens to Gretl, even to mention her fav chicken, she would literally bawling her eyes out at the drop of the hat. first I thought it was just nervousness but at time went on, it got worse. For god's sake, she is seven years old, she really does not deserve to have this disease nor have the anxiety between her father and herself (butting heads, argues).

I know the meds DID help her with her schooling, it calms her and makes her more aware of her surroundings.

Lastly I asked the question to the doctor why he didn't agree with the tests above, he said the meds didn't have the chance to leave her system for good.

My hubby has those issues. So does my nephew who has austism (my hubby's sister's son) so I am certain in his family has passed down the awful gene to my daughter.

Would it ever end? It's getting very expensive to get dd's diagnosis and getting her treated and you would get all kind of different DX that no one seems to agree on. But this doctor, he seems to be very genuine in his findings and one of the best in the field for PSY testings.

I'm the only rational being in the family........

 

[geebs]

I will add my 2 cents here... Been there done that. I will say there are 100's of qualified PSY docs out there.... Most do not have enough experience with Autism and asperbers... That is an absolute fact... It is so new that more is known about other disorders than that of Autism and especially the Asperbergers.... Get another opinion. I would speak with someone whose focus is on Aspergers... they will be able to help you traverse this vast ocean of confusion. I have had lots of experts also, however, unless they have an extensive background in brain mapping and autism they will just want to medicate.... Medication is DANGEROUS for Aspergers in a very real sense... before you have a person put on medication to control part of the their brain an MRI of the brain to show misfunction should be done.... Otherwise they are guessing at what drugs may or may not work.

 

[paperdragonfarm]

Geebs

Just pure

 

[EweSheep]

Quote:
The problem is this...our insurance will NOT pay for Aspergers testings, they deemed not medically necessary.

There is no way we can afford to pay for the services either, we are already behind paying for her testing expenses anyway. Gotta keep trying to find one to verify Aspergers.

 

[Knock Kneed Hen]

What do you do when you get an educational diagnosis of Asperger's and a medical diagnosis of PDD? The doctor said that he meets many of the criteria for asperber's and I should read books on it, use the information to help me manage him, but that he doesn't meet enough of the criteria for a medical diagnosis. Lets see, it acts like a duck, it quacks like a duck....it just doesn't quack loud enough so therefore it's not a duck ......