Is this fair?

[punk-a-doodle]

Sit down with your dad, and tell him how this makes you feel. That it hurts your feelings that he is spending a lot of money and time with your brother, but doesn't seem interested in even allowing you to spend the money you have earned on something that means a lot to you. If desired, have a school counselor or an adult who you find to be calm and trustworthy help discuss how such a conversation might go and how to prepare. If you are concerned about your dad hiding spending from your mom, you can talk about that with him (or a counselor) too, but I'd recommend spacing that out in a separate conversation.

The fact that you are afraid your mom will tell others that you are a bad kid is worrying to me. It sounds like you have a lot going on, maybe more than you have written here. I hope you can find someone.to confide in. Best of luck to you.

 

[chickened]

This seems sort of surreal.

 

[ChickenAlgebra]

What we've taught our kids to do is if they find something to be hideously unfair is to please sit down, write a calm letter about what they think is unfair and why, put it in an envelope, seal it and put whatever parent name on it that they want to read it first. We then write a letter in return, so on and so forth.

Why letters? Simple. It's written down, no one has a melt down and dissolves into a screaming match. It's clear what someone feels the problem is and what a fair solution is.

However, your brother is getting stuff, granted, expensive items, but it's stuff none the less. You have pets. Pets are NOT cheap at all and take a good deal of time and energy. My 14 y/o has a horse instead of an iPod. She wanted and still wants the horse more than an iPod, so she made that decision.

 

[Mattemma]

Ask the sellers if they would deliver.Ask family friends or your mom..Be creative in meeting your needs and work hard in school so you can move out soon.

 

[welsummerchicks]

Is it possible that your parents just aren't that excited about your hobby? It kind of sounds like it.

And, I hate to say it, but kids often feel one kid is getting a better deal than they are. It's really a good idea to try and not dwell on those thoughts.

 

[gamebirdboy]

I know how you feel, my parent's aren't exactly thrilled about my birds either. My dad helps process birds, but he does get free meat... The only way I can keep my birds is if I pay for them. So in order to keep my birds I have to sell some so I can keep them. My grandpa is a big help though, he keeps a few at his house and helps me take care of them a lot. Try asking a family member to come with you to get the coop, it might work. Hope you get this straightened out.

 

[Firefighter Chick]

Quote:

sometimes you can't wait for others to help you out. Perhaps you could collect scrap wood and update your own coops then use the extra to build some small chicken tractors to sell for money, then save that money for your own future renovations? Perhaps a 4H project? Maybe you could sell eggs or baby chicks for some extra cash? One of the satisfying things about raising poultry is that you are not so dependant on the commercial food stores. There are a lot of people looking to save money and/or be more "natural" in their food choices. Use what knowledge you have learned on here and put it to work. Remember, life is not always fair. You'll probably see more unfair things as you get older. Make the best of it and you'll be a stronger person.

 

[DuckLover2399]

Quote:
The thing is if i did that my mom or dad whoever i was writing the note to would get and come tll me im wrong with words outloud they woldnt use a pen and paper

 

[rancher hicks]

Postings like this make me sad. I still suggest waiting til you can move from home to invest the time and money in a hobby. Then you can do it your way and the right way. I've been here and believe me I know what the OP is going through. Parents like this are not a reflection on the quality of the child. This is why I suggest talking to a school counselor if you can.

Take care

Rancher

 

[DuckLover2399]

I would talk to a counseler but if i did they would treat me like a 5 yr old. Saying oh its not your money you cant spend, ect.