Kids in restaurants...

and so you all know... I REMOVED my youngest from a family diner- a few scattered people--last night because it was a long day for her and she was whining and being difficult all over a non-issue....but it happens and all I wanted was to sit down and eat a warm meal.

nope, it wasn't acceptable.... I let my friend stay there with my oldest... he boxed up our meals and came out to my car where we were waiting and gave us our meals so we could go home and he went back and ate his meal.... I had a talk with her and she settled down but was very sad, she was hungry and tired... but she has to learn that throwing a fit about WHERE she sits is NOT acceptable.

We probably were in the car for 10 minutes before he came out with our meals boxed up and my oldest dd. I figured they'd eat but my oldest dd wanted "mommy." It's just one of those highly needy times for the girls lately with all that's going on in our lives.

But my youngest one is a pistol... she is soooo hard headed... ok, genetics... it runs on both sides.
 
Most kids behave in restaurants, but the brats really stand out in our memories and give kids in restaurants a bad rap. I thought that I would relate a positive experience. I was in a very nice restaurant when a large family gathering was seated near us. There was a very nice young man, approximately 8 - 9 years old with them. I saw him holding the door for his elders when they came in. I saw him sitting quietly eating while the adults talked. I heard him address the wait staff and the others at his table with please, thank you, etc. I saw him retrieve something from the buffet salad bar for a woman that appeared to be his grandmother. When the family was leaving, they walked next to our table. I got the father's attention and told him that the young man was the most polite and well behaved child I had seen in a restaurant in a long time. The kid heard me, and his chest puffed up so big I thought he was going to pop the buttons on his little suit jacket. Then he scurried to the door to get there before the adults so he could hold it open for them. I just though I would remind us all that there are lots of good kids. We should compliment the ones with good manners. As for the wailing brats and their parents...........
 
Parents need to teach their kids manners before going out in public. We had a kid at Sammios come to our table and take our rolls from the edge of the table and walk off. Of course the parents were AWWW isn't he a cutie and we were like Ummm NO and when they offered to give the rolls back the kid started picking his nose
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My children have eaten in nice restaurants since they were babies. Their dad only had to take them for "The Parking Lot Walk" once each.
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After experiencing "The Parking Lot Walk" one realizes that sitting & eating are good things.
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I am not a big advocate of corporal punishment, but they got the point at very young ages. Now, as teens, they are fun to have around.

The screaming banshees aside, my least favorite restaurant parents are the older professional types who think that their little Liam or Helen is the first child ever born on this Earth. Because their offspring is soooo special, he or she must be allowed to *Explore The Environment as Freely as Possible*. This translates into their toddler running about, smearing hands on jackets, visiting the kitchen, tripping waitstaff, etc. while Mummy & Daddy gush: "Ooooh look! Liam wants to help make the sushi" or "Helen is going to introduce herself to everyone!" I grew up blue collar. My people knew that there were plenty of kids to go around & they didn't need to share.
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Oh, and I deplore people who have their kids out past 9p.m I really want to pummel parents who think that it is fine to feed a 4 y.o. at 9:30!
 
Once in Godfather's Pizza, our peaceful meal was interupted by a woman shrieking that the woman at the table next to her was making her meal intolerable. She was yelling at the manager that the other woman had the audacity to tell her that her toddler shouldn't be running around the restaurant picking up all of parmsean cheese shakers and licking the tops. We heard her complain that the poor baby had been sick with the flu and a fever and now that he felt better people needed to be more understanding. We looked around and sure enough saw a snot nosed toddler at her table licking the tops of cheese shakers that he had collected from around the restaurant. Then the lady got mad at the manager when he told her that the other woman was right and asked her not to let the child do that. She was absolutely beside herself when the he had a waitress collect all of the cheese shakers in the room so that they could be dumped and cleaned. She made quite the scene saying how ridiculous it was that people were worried about germs from a baby. There were other adults at her table, and they just seemed oblivious. This was probably 20 years ago, so that kid is now probably a parent that inheirited no parenting skills.
 
My husband and I have brought my daughter to restaurants since the day she was born. That said, I was also a waitress and have an immense hatred for misbehaved children in a restaurant. Children running unsupervised are a danger not only to waitstaff and themselves, but to elderly patrons, mothers carrying children and the disabled. Screaming children and banging children ruin more than their parents dinner.

When my daughter was an infant, if she was in a temper we didn't go out to eat. If she was in a good mood we went out to eat and brought plenty of formula and other accoutrement's. If she started to cry, she was scooped up and brought out to the lobby or outside. If she couldn't be calmed down, we left.

When she became able to sit up, and was old enough for "punishment" or to remember consequences we started a routine. If she became fussy or disruptive to OUR dinner ( way before anyone outside our table would have noticed) , one of us would get up and leave, we would then place her in the car seat inside the car and stand outside of the car. This way she was safely restrained, but not getting the Mommy-Daddy attention she was acting out for, and we were still in her sight. When the other was finished we would swap and finish dinner, pay and leave. We didn't get to eat together, but we did get to eat out and she got a lesson that if she misbehaved in the restaurant she would be removed from the table just like she would at home.

Once at a burger king when she was about 4 she threw a huge temper tantrum. We had been driving from Massachusetts to Delaware and she was tired. I let her know this did not excuse her behavior, then I escorted her around while she apologized to every person seated inside the restaurant. I think she learned that day that I wasn't messing around.

We have always been able to take our daughter to any restaurant because we have always expected a high standard of behavior, have always been willing to leave and she knows that. I absolutely adore children in restaurants, in their seats behaving.

Laney
 
I know some people think that if they are paying for the meal they should be able to do whatever they want while in the restaurant but I'm just not one of those people. Several of my kids have had to be removed from a restaurant-no need to hit them or yell at them, removing them from a family outing is more than enough to teach them a lesson. None of them ever needed a repeat lesson.....'course we had to do the same thing in the grocery store a time or two but again they all learned after the first time. The key is to never go out with children who are in need of a nap or are not feeling well. If you schedule these things well a lot of those tantrums and behavior problems can be avoided entirely.
 
Great topic!

I take my kids to some places and they do fine. Manners!! But I have a young one she is coming up on her 2nd birthday. There are alot of places I would not take her.

Once when she was just around 4 months old we ventured out to a breakfast place. She cried like there was no tomorrow and instead of making everyone suffer I took her outside to sooth her and calm her down. lol

I think if your kid pitches a fit its time to step outside for a breath of fresh air
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I wanted to add that the last two times I have taken my lil one out for dinner we have had people come over to us and compliment us on what well behaved childern we have....
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they dont get to see them at home in action
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I agree.
But, I feel bad for those kinds of kids, because its the parents who are allowing the behavior.
If the parent is actually making a conserted effort, and not just nagging and threatening, then I can handle it.
 

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