Kinda aggravated.....Rant

[Cindiloohoo]

I read the title and thought uh oh...somebody has really ticked off the Palestinian, this could get ugly

I'd not keep the kids anymore. I agree the ^*&@# donor should watch his own kids while wifey goes to make a living for him.

What the crud is wrong with people?!?! Dropping them off sick too? And SHE is the one that is mad.......

Sounds like you've bent over backward for them. Hope that she stays mad and quits making you ill with her germy kids. I just love people that take take take and then expect more.

I have EX "friends" like that too

Sorry for you Turney, but I'd definately let them go elsewhere. It really makes me feel bad for the kids

 

[PineappleMama]

Think long term here...

Yeah taking the sick kids that day helps her out... but what about in two days when you are sick and cannot take them? When they lose their sitter for days, even weeks, because of what you caught from them? That's not helping in the long run.

And if you DO take the kids, when you know you've been exposed, then you run the risk of giving it back to them... and then they give it back to you and on and on it goes... not even counting if Mom gets it and as a result misses work and causes them financial troubles.

Saying no one day can save days and days, even weeks, of illness, missed work, etc for all later.... including YOUR family who may be contaminated by you later on... and how many can they then spread it too... and so on. Isolation is the only way to stop a bug from spreading... that's why so many places (schools, day cares, etc) have rules like that in place.

I know that sounds dramatic... but it's a fact that they caught it from somewhere because someone didn't isolate... and because Mom knowing hers were sick didn't isolate now you are ill...

You aren't responsible for their choices, not at all, but you are responsible for your own... you mentioned that you will be forced to skip your plans to protect your family... and that sucks, but is the best choice to protect those you care about... well... do you care about these kiddos? You seem to, VERY much... so why would you risk reinfecting them?

Just something to think on.

 

[JustAChickenLittle&More]

TrueByc I know what you mean. I hate it when moms send their kids to school sick just to get them outta the house. Then the other kids get it, and they pass it to family members, etc., and eventually it is right back with the kid and going around again. I think a lot of our new medicines (since the 60's, 70's), have given false hope to a lot of people and they think the doctors can cure anything but cancer (well, some of them). God help us all if someone gets sent to school with something that mimicks a cold/flu and its really the Bird Flu or something else.
As far as having to watch the sick kids, I would absolutely refuse. What is this woman going to do when the kids are in school and they become sick. Is she going to call you when the nurse calls to pick them up? Thats not fair to you and also, what happens when god forbid you are not here anymore. She needs to learn better responsbility and give you a break.

 

[turney31]

Quote:
Hey Red, read post 19. He is a real pos.

 

[turney31]

Quote:
I must come across way worse than I intend, cause although opiniated I am really a nice person. Just not much tolerance for other posters who belittle people or judge based on grammar or poor spelling. My snarkyness comes in defense of others.

I also type with one finger, so I post with the shortest answers or responses, so it does sound short sometimes without that intention.

The kids are in fact safer here.

 

[Wifezilla]

A man without a job who wont watch his own children is a useless piece of garbage. He certainly isn't a man. Someone needs to take out the trash.

 

[turney31]

I agree!

 

[redhen]

Quote:
Hey Red, read post 19. He is a real pos.

Ahhh..i see now!

 

[PineappleMama]

I missed post 19... CPS will definitely step in with an adult like that in the house. A failed drug test, kids gone. Spousal abuse, kids gone. Put them both together and it's no contest.

Of course proving the abuse is tricky, but you can get the door open with the failed test... then everything is open for investigation... whether Mom wants it or not. Might be the wake up call she needs.

Is the Grandmother HER mom or his? I have to wonder why she hasn't done anything to protect her grandbabies... I guess if it's his mom that might explain it... but if it's her mom why in the world would you stand by and watch your child be hurt, work herself to the bone AND watch your grandbabies suffer?

What a mess... at this point you're just helping Mom stay in a bad situation... I understand why, I do... my Sis's kids are in foster care right this minute AGAIN... doesn't make it easy to say no... when you care very much about the kids. But saying yes just keeps the cycle going... in the end you have to think of which is worse. Okay for 8 hours today and damaged for the 16 they're at home.... or the break happening... resulting in weeks (minimum) of upheaval but in the end the kiddos having a stable and safe home... it is not an easy call to make... not at all. But sometimes, someone, has to step up and do what the parents should be... or rather, call in someone who will.

 

[turney31]

Quote:
PM, It is a very hard decision to make and not an easy one. It is Her Mom. They are done, they keep communication open so they can see the kids. I can see where her parents cutting off their help would be the tough love. And needed but I don't see where me as a friend is enabling. I know she has no where else to go when he beats the snot out of her. When she let him move back in he had to be put on the lease, which makes it hard on the cops to make him leave after an incident. She and the kids came here last time. It took a restraining order to get him out of the house. Stayed apart 3 or4 mos. Christmas time comes, she is lonley. Says I'm exhausted...Any help better than no help...etc. He begs...I'm clean...Have a job starting soon...I promise to never hit you again...She wanted to give him one more chance.

She bought the BS.

When I found out he was back... I asked her did she have a will?...Have you decided who you want to care for your kids after he kills you? That this just may be the one time too many. I have refused to help with groceries at her house since he moved back in. I will however let her and the kids eat with us any time. She has been told he is not welcome at our home. I will not give him the kids if he were to try to pick them up, I will file tresspassing charges if he shows. Dh has made it very clear what will happen if he touches her again. We mean it. Cps will be called.

If it happens again I guess I will have to tell her I can't help any more, I just don't get that having no place safe is better? With her job if she leaves without a uniform she can't work and will lose her job. Where does that leave the kids. He is bad about taking her phone, keys,uniforms anything to get her back in the house. Please understand that if it was just her.....I would have nothing to do with either one of them (mom and Dad). But these children deserve a soft place to fall where they are loved.