Men and Their Pride

[Black Feather]

I’ve observed a situation recently and was just wondering about it a bit. A sports instructor of mine was recently injured and will require approximately 6 months off before he can return to teaching or training. He however seems to have a bit of a pride issue....or maybe it’s something else, I’m not sure. He will not be seen by any of his students until he is fit again. Won’t come by the club and seems to have generally withdrawn overall.

One of his students has recently become very ill with cancer and a group of us has gotten her a card and have signed it. When the woman who is coordinating the card signing got in touch with our instructor by email to see if she could drop by his house so he could also sign the card, he politely refused. To me this is absolute BS and unacceptable and I think he should check his pride at the door and allow himself to be seen to sign the card. Am I off the mark on this one? This just seems like an extreme case of male pride.

P.S: I'm not trying to beat up on guys here.....just am a bit perplexed by this one particular situation.

UC

 

[Boyd]

I am too. Did he have a stroke of some sort?

 

[Black Feather]

No, it was a physical injury that happened in class.

I can't seem to wrap my head around this one. I don't want to lose respect for my instructor, but this to me really rattles my faith in him.

 

[boaz]

Unless you have a really big piece, it is hard to solve a puzzle with just one. I would resist jumping to any conclusions; he politely refused, leave it at that. You didn't mention his age, it might be vanity, he may also be coming to grips with his mortality or reading the works of Shakespeare - who knows. My guess would lean more towards depression on his part.

 

[Buff Hooligans]

Quote:
I agree. When I hit the bottom, I don't want anything to do with anybody. Talking with people is just too much work for me to face.
Maybe he is struggling with that...

 

[wegotchickens]

Depending on how and where he was hurt he may not be able to bathe or take good care of hygeine issues. I wouldn't want folks to see me with my hair all greasy and my body stinking.

Plus he may be unable to maintain his own standards in house care, too.

Plus, he may be a bit depressed about the whole deal, too.

 

[deb1]

When I first read your post, I thought that his actions sounded odd. I think that Boaz hit this one on the head. Your instructor sounds as if he is battling depression.

 

[Black Feather]

Depression could definitely be a possibility, although hard to say for sure. I do suspect there is something else going on other than what is obvious.

Unfortunately I still don't necessarily agree with his actions regarding the card. As unfortunate as his situation is, our club member with cancer is in far worse shape and a little support such as signing a card I don't think is beyond reason.

UC

 

[farrier!]

Gee, depression or a sex change......

Not good for anyone to take out their problems on someone else. The card sounds like such an easy thing to do, something else must be going on.

 

[wombat]

It might just be "business" for him. If your stock in trade is being really fit, it might be worrisome to have your customer base seeing you when you aren't.

You'd think that a sports instructor would be more valued for their knowledge and their abilitiy to understand and motivate people, but if he feels he has to be more buff than his clients to earn a living, he might be afraid to be seen as less.

Or, as others pointed out, maybe his condition has made it hard to keep the house up to standard, and having a client drop by would be embarrasing.