Minnesota!

[duluthralphie]

I think they do it just to make us worry about them. When I see one out in the morning I breath a sigh of relief and am ticked off at them at the same time. Just like if they were teens.

 

[scandiafowl]

I am working on writing an exam/questionaire for people wanting into the Redneck club. After all we do have to maintain our standards.

I have these questions so far and am willing to take suggestions..








Redneck Test:

7-12 points is probationary member
over 12 your in
under 7 tough luck

Give yourself a point for each of these true items:

I own an outhouse
*No, but I'll use one, does that give me credit?

I have a pickup truck older than 12 years old
*No

I wear socks with sandals
*take issue with this question. This is a sure indicator of nerd status*
*No

I own a spear or pitch fork I have used to stab fish
*No
I have cleaned a bullhead
*Yes
I have a gun rack in one or more vehicles
*No
I consider a snowmobile and 4-wheeler a vehicle
*Own neither
I have skun a fur bearing critter
*Do rabbits count?
I own an animal trap
*No
I eat wild animals
*Vegetarian
I have drank too much cheap beer at least once
*Yes
I have more than 1000 rounds of ammunition
*No
I consider wearing camo dressing up
*No
I have a stock tank for a bath tub
*No
I have a relative related to me through both my parents
*No
I know an Ice house is not for storing ice
*Yes
I have used and enjoy tanerite
*No
8th grade was hardest 3 years of my life
*Graduated early from high school
People walk gingerly through my yard to avoid stepping in Poop
*We warn them
People avoid me because they know I will tell them about my poultry
*It's getting there.

So, conservatively 5 points.





Subtract 1 point for:

I own a suit
*No
I have worn said suit more than once
*No
I have an electric car
*No
I have no dogs over 50 pounds
*No
My dog is named Muffy, Buffy or Fluffy
*No
I do not know what Tannerite is
*Yes
Having never fished bullheads
*Not intentionally
I have never had a fishing, hunting or trapping license
*No
I do not know what an outhouse is for
*No
People have never rolled their eyes at me for mentioning my poultry
*No
You have no idea what Shoot, shovel and shut-up (the 3 S's) refer too
*No
I drink my beer warm or dark
*Yes
I do not think "skun" is a word
*No
Your home does not lack at least one of the following: Trim, walls, steps, sinks, or other major items
*No

Geeez. That leaves 3 points!

 

[scandiafowl]

Dear, God, I'm NEGATIVE 7. I'll be purchasing a condo in downtown Minneapolis very soon. 

Don't feel too bad, I'll be down the road from you in the Uptown area.

 

[duluthralphie]

I think you are at 6 Scandia Which is not bad..

Not intentional fishing for bullheads can be construed to mean you have fished them.

Warning people about Poop does not matter. They still have to step in it or around it..


I can see I need to re-word the quiz.

 

[Bogtown Chick]

I took the pup to the Vet this morning. She pooped in my car on the way home. So not only is it my yard...but apparently stepping into an SUV at our place warrants tentative stepping.

We are definitely going through a phase with her. She's like a horribly awkward teenager who thinks she can rule the the roost...but knows deep down she can't.

I want my old one back. NOt this PITA.

I love all the work Ralphie on the new coop/hospital ward. So now which direction does that big open door face? Southerly exposure?

 

[scandiafowl]

I think you are at 6 Scandia  Which is not bad..

Not intentional fishing for bullheads can be construed to mean you have fished them.

Warning people about Poop does not matter. They still have to step in it or around it..


I can see I need to re-word  the quiz.

*whew* thanks!

I'd like to see the following areas addressed as well:

- chewing tobacco
- appliances as yard decor
- choice of TV shows
- how closely you are related to your spouse, other than through marriage
- velour Elvis posters in your bedroom.

I'd still fail :-(

 

[scandiafowl]

@duluthralphie

Great chicken setup!

 

[Bogtown Chick]

are you telling me im already spoiling them to much... LOL...really though thanks for the info...

Yes. And let me tell you why. Because I was doing the same things you were doing when I first got chickens and I learned some things about it and I want to share so you don't lose those neat birds you have there or become disenchanted when they quit laying eggs. They will get fat on corn, oatmeal, fruit, etc if that is their main feed and the formulated feed is not being eaten. You're hens will develop fat in and around their organs making it difficult for them to lay eggs and they will quit laying eggs and heartbreakingly some of their livers will hemmorhage out and they'll die. (Had it happened to me) I've also fed warm steamy oatmeal and squash to birds on days that were -25 F "to warm them up" only to give them all frost bite from the moisture from the steam. There were all sorts of lessons I learned on spoiling chickens with "treats".

Ultimately they are yours though, Coffee. Just sharing my lessons.

Edited to add that I admire your ambition making things bigger there. When it comes to chicken spaces -->. Bigger is better .

 

[duluthralphie]

I have changed the redneck entrance exam some, I took the suggestions and I removed the confusion over double negatives. I assume I have to subtract a point for knowing what a double negative is and why it caused a problem...


Redneck Test:

7-12 points is probationary member
over 12 your in
under 7 tough luck

Give yourself a point for each yes:

1. I own an outhouse
2. I have a pickup truck older than 12 years old
3. I wear socks with sandals
4. I own a spear or pitch fork I have used to stab fish
5. I have cleaned a bullhead
6. I have a gun rack in one or more vehicles
7. I consider a snowmobile and 4-wheeler a vehicle
8. I have skun a fur bearing critter
9. I own an animal trap
10. I eat wild animals
11. I have drank too much cheap beer at least once
12. I have more than 1000 rounds of ammunition
13. I consider wearing camo dressing up
14. I have a stock tank for a bath tub
15. I have a relative related to me through both my parents
16. I know an Ice house is not for storing ice
17. I have used and enjoy tanerite
18. 8th grade was hardest 3 years of my life
19. People walk gingerly through my yard to avoid stepping in Poop
20. People avoid me because they know I will tell them about my poultry
21. I keep extra pallets around just in case
22. I have more vehicles in my yard than licensed driversin the household. ( not all vehicles need to run.

23. I chew tobacco
24. I have old appliances under my yard
25. I saw my spouse at family reunions before we started dating

Subtract 1 point for Yes for following:

1. I own a suit
2. I have worn said suit more than once
3. I have an electric car
4. I have dogs under 50 pounds
5. My dog is named Muffy, Buffy or Fluffy
6. I drink my beer warm or dark

Subtract one point for answering No to the following:





Thanks Scandia for subtlety pointing out the errors to me...

1. I have caught a bullhead
2. I have had a fishing, hunting or trapping license
3. People have rolled their eyes at me for mentioning my poultry
4. I know what Shoot, shovel and shut-up (the 3 S's) refers too
5. I believe skun is a real word
6. I know what Tannerite is

 

[duluthralphie]

*whew* thanks!

I'd like to see the following areas addressed as well:

- chewing tobacco
- appliances as yard decor
- choice of TV shows
- how closely you are related to your spouse, other than through marriage
- velour Elvis posters in your bedroom.

I'd still fail :-(

Will take under advisement.. I changed some the TV shows were too hard to score, and Everyone has that Velour Elvis poster so it does not count.