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That's how we run things at my house. Kids who follow the house rules get to play with my cool toys and run around largely unsupervised (within reason). Kids who show they cannot be trusted to follow the house rules will have to sit quietly near the adults and read.
Really, anyone who will not require their kids to follow your rules or will not follow them themselves is not someone you want to welcome into your home. Random example: My uncle does not like for anyone to wash their hands at the kitchen sink, despite there being hand soap sitting right next to it. I find this rather silly, personally. But it is his house, and I will show he and his household the respect of doing as he wishes.
Parents are sometimes surprised by how well their kids behave when they visit. But I make my expectations very clear to the kids, and I'm very consistent in enforcing the rules.
That's the thing. Kids need to clearly know the rules and that they will consistently be enforced. Telling them not to do something, and then "letting it go" when they do that exact thing tells them, "When I said leave the chickens alone, I really didn't mean it. Go ahead and do whatever you want because I'm not going to stop you." When kids are visiting here, the rules are explained, and they are expected to follow them. I have 3 grown sons. When they were younger and their friends would come over, they knew without a doubt what was expected of them and what the consequences were if they broke the rules.
That's how we run things at my house. Kids who follow the house rules get to play with my cool toys and run around largely unsupervised (within reason). Kids who show they cannot be trusted to follow the house rules will have to sit quietly near the adults and read.
Really, anyone who will not require their kids to follow your rules or will not follow them themselves is not someone you want to welcome into your home. Random example: My uncle does not like for anyone to wash their hands at the kitchen sink, despite there being hand soap sitting right next to it. I find this rather silly, personally. But it is his house, and I will show he and his household the respect of doing as he wishes.
Parents are sometimes surprised by how well their kids behave when they visit. But I make my expectations very clear to the kids, and I'm very consistent in enforcing the rules.
That's the thing. Kids need to clearly know the rules and that they will consistently be enforced. Telling them not to do something, and then "letting it go" when they do that exact thing tells them, "When I said leave the chickens alone, I really didn't mean it. Go ahead and do whatever you want because I'm not going to stop you." When kids are visiting here, the rules are explained, and they are expected to follow them. I have 3 grown sons. When they were younger and their friends would come over, they knew without a doubt what was expected of them and what the consequences were if they broke the rules.
