My leukemia's back.

[LittleLakePhil]

Phil, you have found the right place.  We've got your back.  The Princess, our daughter, and our grand daughter have all been diagnosed with depression (the majority of my wife's family deal with anxiety and/of depression).  It is scary as hell when you can not 'reach' the person who is the most important thing in the world to you.  Been there/done that - thankfully medication has everything under control.  I understand.

Thank you...means a lot....when I first retired. I was so alone...I didn't want to do FB....but finding this place really gave me some where to check in here and there through out the day....you feel a lot less lonely that way..

 

[ronott1]

Thank you...means a lot....when I first retired. I was so alone...I didn't want to do FB....but finding this place really gave me some where to check in here and there through out the day....you feel a lot less lonely that way..

Yes, much better than Face Book!

 

[LittleLakePhil]

Yes, much better than Face Book!

Yeah I think so too!

 

[donrae]

Phil, praying for your depression to lift. I know this time of year does it for some folks. I agree the overcast rainy weather doesn't help things at all!

I saw my team from OHSU today. They're going to try baclofen for the muscle cramps. It shouldn't be too sedating, but hopefully effective.

No other real changes. I told her I could feel a difference this last drop on the prednisone, down to 15mg a day. I'm more short of breath, coughing some again when I hadn't been at all. She said to anticipate staying on this dose for a few months at least, and I told her I was okay with that. I'd been pushing pretty hard to taper down, but I really don't like how my breathing is now. Living in the land of rain and mud, we have to dry the dogs off each time they come in the house. I can do one dog, then sit down and gasp for 10 minutes. then breathe normally but still sit for another 10 minutes. then repeat with dog 2. It's really not that much exertion, it shouldn't take that much out of me. And it didn't on just a bit more prednisone. I'm thinking to go back up to maybe 20mg a day, that might be my sweet spot. I'll talk to my local doc tomorrow.

Otherwise counts are looking good still

. I didn't mention butchering birds, I'm not sure how they'd feel about that.......

 

[LittleLakePhil]

Thanks Rachel now I'm more worried about you....yes depression sucks but I'll push through....I just wish your breathing would straighten up. I am a big Rachel supporter....so hang in there....you know how to get a hold of me if you want to vent...scream...cry...or laugh...a friend.....Phil

 

[sourland]

Good morning, all.

 

[donrae]

Aww, thanks Phil, but I'm doing okay. I'm just not bright enough to always realize when something isn't working

. I was so focused on getting OFF the prednisone, I didn't really realize how much this last taper had affected me. I've now made peace with being on it, and I may even do a small burst to get "reset".

I wish we could get the energy and almost euphoric feeling it gives without the myriad of horrible things that go with it

.

It's so rainy here, I'm having birds on wet ground. All I can do for the time being is pile more straw or shavings on to give them dry areas. Honey found some appropriate sized sheet metal to fully cover the roof of the open pens, hopefully the weather breaks enough we can do that this weekend. Then I'll have the task of cleaning wet bedding out and building up dry.

this is when I almost wish we froze during the winter. That way we'd only have to deal with mud in the spring, not all winter long.

 

[turtlesgalore]

Keeping busy, I call it my piddle days when I have bad days. depression in me I caused by my body not being able to process the serotonin, That's the stuff that makes your brain work right. I truly could not do the things I do without God. It is true "all things are possible with God". Heat Stroke caused old air bag injury to pinch spinal cord so I was having mini strokes, got that fixed and now I am hyper sensitive to sunlight and heat and in process found out I'm in that 1% of people that have the goofy side effects

on most meds. I don't go to anyone but my general practiciner now and don't want to know any more. We can't get to heaven except one way. And I'm just going to live till I die. Trust God and keep walking. sometimes feels like wondering. that's what I do. Guys I'm only 45. So when I can think straight, I say ok Lord who we going to pray for today. I just pray for people all day, sometimes all night. sorry for rambling guys. but I don't do facebook either... just bragging and gossip

in a small town. But I your a crook you can find out who is out of town. I know I'm new here, so thinks for the patience in my rambling.

 

[Blooie]

Good morning! Kendra's a little late getting here this morning so I had time for one more cup of coffee!

Phil, one of the hardest things about FB is that folks seem to feel this need to "feed our souls" with platitudes, tips to avoid depression or anxiety, and advice that can actually make us feel worse than when we signed in! It's temper tantrums, people hiding behind curtains and making themselves feel bigger by making others feel worse. It's political opinion, half-truths, out-and-out lies, and I hate wading through that to get to photos and updates of my friends and family.

When my sister Linda got so sick, I decided to start a family page, and participation is just for our family....no one else can get in without an invitation. That worked very well because then all Russ had to do was post updates on Linda's condition in one place when the opportunities came up, rather than trying to keep track of calling everyone. We've kept it alive and it's been invaluable since Ashley was diagnosed. So used right, it can be a wonderful family tool without scrolling through all the garbage.

But this place? This place just feels different somehow. If I don't get a chance to check in, I feel like I've missed part of my day. It helps me put things in perspective...helps keep me grounded. I have another place I visit regularly and I'd be lost without both.

 

[3goodeggs]

I try to stay optimistic without giving false hope. Sometimes all someone really needs to be heard.
And I think here, we all know the reality of life, and often reality isn't pretty,
Laughter is the best medicine and we are good doctors to each other that way.

When I was going through a really rough patch, BYC was a friendly, safe, kind place.
I could be sad and miserable, and in my jammies avoiding humanity- without having to be alone while I went through it.
I could log on in tears and be laughing a few minutes later,
Chicken people are good people

...and you duck people too. You are also good people.