My leukemia's back.

[turtlesgalore]

stay positive through the holidays Rachel, maybe it's a test of faith. It'll work out God always honers faith. we'll be praying for your new house to show up sorta quick like. K

 

[LittleLakePhil]

Hey Rachel....I know the feeling about going to the docs and every time they say something new is wrong.
Let me tell you something. You are less than a year out from your transplant. FATIGUE is normal....I suffered tons of fatigue for years I think. Your body had just been run through the wringer...you may never feel the same way you felt before. But I think you'll feel well enough to be thankful.....trust me girl I'm invested in you....we both have this "thing" in common.....hopefully the Dr's tell you your heart's just fine.....the fatigue will be there for a while...but it gets better.....your friend....Phil

 

[Blooie]

Yeah, what they said! Hang in there...we've got your back so all you have to do is look forward.

 

[donrae]

Thank you all, and especially Phil. It's great to have some perspective from the other side of all this.

I've been thinking (not really, of course...) maybe I'll just quit going to the doctors! They just find more things wrong with me it seems.....and I hate sounding whiney and ungrateful. I'm leukemia free far as we know and that's amazing. Cause that probably would have killed me by now all on it's own. This breathing stuff isn't going to kill me (I don't think, anyway), it's just making my life different. Having a bad heart shouldn't kill me (I don't think!), but it will make my life different. Maybe this is when I need to get back into the Word and be looking for what God wants me to do, not what I want to do.

I went out and looked at that house yesterday. I'm much less enamored of it after seeing it in person. First, as I'm driving down this 1/2 mile two track driveway that's barely wide enough for my van, I notice the hill goes straight up the passenger side. that makes me wonder if there's cell service here, cause I know it's spotty in this area. Then, as I pull up to the house, I'm thinking "I didn't tell anyone I was coming out here"...haven't we all seen a movie where the dumb chick does something like that? So I pull up in front of the place and I'm thinking the pics were from the last time it was vacant, cause the front door is painted a different color now. Overall it just looks more run down than the pics. I go to the front door and there's a notice for the relators, etc that the house has been "winterized" and please do not turn on faucets, etc. I knock and no one answers, but I get that creepy feeling someone is there. Oookay.....now I'm kind of freaked. I just take a quick peek down into the pasture area and bail. I don't need to run into any squatters or whoever is living there. Sometimes I'm not that bright, have I mentioned that? Anyway, we need to concentrate on getting our finances in order before we buy. It could be a fun challenge, how fast can we save up ten grand for a down payment?

 

[3goodeggs]

I did the same thing when we were looking for property.
I am alone in the woods driving around and... the idea comes over me that this might not be a good idea.
I sometimes think that is when our guardian angels whisper in our mind's ear.

 

[Blooie]

!!!!!Rachel Donrae Team!!!!!!

(Sorry, couldn't do the first, middle, last name so I improvised!) WHAT were you thinking to go out there by yourself? At least you had enough sense to listen to that angel on your shoulder and skeedaddle!

I am sorry that the property wasn't quite up to your earlier impression. I think we all do that - get a glimpse of something, remember as we'd like to remember it, then crash when reality doesn't quite fit that vision. But I'm sure gonna be praying for a windfall that gives you some seed money toward that down payment!!

 

[LittleLakePhil]

You all should "carry"....just sayin...


When my wife had to drive 25 miles home at 1 or 2 in the am....always wish she did.

And again Rachel....recovery takes a long long time.....Phil

 

[sourland]

I did the same thing when we were looking for property.
I am alone in the woods driving around and... the idea comes over me that this might not be a good idea.
I sometimes think that is when our guardian angels whisper in our mind's ear.

My guardian angels have to shout.

Trust me in that I have overworked them through the years.

 

[3goodeggs]

I know it has been a difficult week for you sour.
here is a hug.

 

[sourland]

Thanks, 3GE. I'll take a hug anytime. I am big on hugs.