This is a fascinating thread.
I had not considered the different way people define "being a good neighbor", so it was good to read about that here. I wonder how many conflicts could be improved by communities having a discussion about what it means to be a good neighbor for them.
For me personally being a good neighbor means looking out for one another and being polite and respectful. For me this goes both ways and is a balance between taking some steps to not disturb each other too much, and also allowing each other to largely live as they will. I do not ask my neighbors for permission to do something, but I do try to give them a heads up or engage them on it (like sharing berries, or letting their grandchildren visit to see the animals), I elected to limit things like chainsawing and ATVs to certain hours, and I'm very proactive about letting them know that if any animal or such of mine gets on their property I will promptly remove them and take action to prevent it from happening again. I also offer to watch their house and care for their garden when they are away.
Something I noticed from when I lived in the city was that people will accept any disruption that's perceived as normal but take issue with any disruption that's perceived as abnormal. Thus why a barking dog is okay but a crowing rooster is not for folks that did not grow up in the farms.
I briefly lived in Chicago, and I complained to a couple people that I hated how you could always hear the interstate traffic no matter where you were. They were quite confused and struggled to understand what noise I was even talking about, or that it could be bothersome to me. In that case I was the out of place person. I learned how normal it was for that area, and got over it (and then left shortly after for rural life again!!).
My current small town community is structured more like "It's okay unless somebody complains". While that does play an important a role in us living and getting along together peacefully, I have not seen the appropriate checks and balances for it going too far. There are no tools to use against somebody that complains too much. What we need is a tool for that flip side, when they begin disrupting your life more than you are disrupting their life. Maybe if your neighbor believes your rooster is a nuisance, everybody that lives on your street comes together for a meeting, you each present your case, and then there's a vote. Just wishful thinking, point is like all things there must be checks and balances and local buy-in of it's going to work well.
I had not considered the different way people define "being a good neighbor", so it was good to read about that here. I wonder how many conflicts could be improved by communities having a discussion about what it means to be a good neighbor for them.
For me personally being a good neighbor means looking out for one another and being polite and respectful. For me this goes both ways and is a balance between taking some steps to not disturb each other too much, and also allowing each other to largely live as they will. I do not ask my neighbors for permission to do something, but I do try to give them a heads up or engage them on it (like sharing berries, or letting their grandchildren visit to see the animals), I elected to limit things like chainsawing and ATVs to certain hours, and I'm very proactive about letting them know that if any animal or such of mine gets on their property I will promptly remove them and take action to prevent it from happening again. I also offer to watch their house and care for their garden when they are away.
Something I noticed from when I lived in the city was that people will accept any disruption that's perceived as normal but take issue with any disruption that's perceived as abnormal. Thus why a barking dog is okay but a crowing rooster is not for folks that did not grow up in the farms.
I briefly lived in Chicago, and I complained to a couple people that I hated how you could always hear the interstate traffic no matter where you were. They were quite confused and struggled to understand what noise I was even talking about, or that it could be bothersome to me. In that case I was the out of place person. I learned how normal it was for that area, and got over it (and then left shortly after for rural life again!!).
My current small town community is structured more like "It's okay unless somebody complains". While that does play an important a role in us living and getting along together peacefully, I have not seen the appropriate checks and balances for it going too far. There are no tools to use against somebody that complains too much. What we need is a tool for that flip side, when they begin disrupting your life more than you are disrupting their life. Maybe if your neighbor believes your rooster is a nuisance, everybody that lives on your street comes together for a meeting, you each present your case, and then there's a vote. Just wishful thinking, point is like all things there must be checks and balances and local buy-in of it's going to work well.
While one shouldn't have to feel like they have to ask permission to do something they're legally entitled to do, it just seems to be common sense to talk to one's neighbor and be considerate (as much as possible) to their comfort and concern.
