My son invited a house guest

[debilorrah]

We seem to collect people too.

 

[dkvart1]

About 6 or 7 years back I had moved from Illinois to Jacksonville. I had rented a small 2 bedroom apartment and BF was going to move in a couple of months down the road. I had only been there a couple of weeks and hadn't even landed a job yet when one day he calls and asks if a woman and her son can stay with me. He explained she was late teens early 20's with a small son (about 18 months old) and she lived with her father, but when he decided he was going to party at night and have women over he would make them leave.

BF acutally met them late in the evening hanging out in a really bad area, and the young woman was crying as she clutched and rocked her son. He said she had a job offer but she couldn't take it because she never knew if she would even get to sleep on those nights when the father kicked her out. I said yes, provided she took the job and that no one other than her and the child sleep at the house. I would house her until she and her bf (who worked at the place where she had the job offer) saved up enough to get an apartment.

What little money I had paid the rent and utilities and put gas in the car as I looked for work. My BF helped out with groceries and day care for her son until she got her first pay check. She only stayed about 3 or 4 weeks, as by then between her and her already working BF they had enough for a small apartment. She was only to happy to help with chores and he son was an absolute delight to have around! Although a lamp did get knocked over in her room and burnt a hole in the carpet, that she never mentioned and that I didnt find until after she left. That peeved me a little (the not telling, not the accident, those happen).

Would I do it again? Yes. Sometimes we just have to respond when another's in need, even if it's tough on us in some way. But again, They would either have to be working or find some type of work within a specified period of time, there would be a time limit on how long they could stay, determined by their circumstances and I would require that they assist with chores, and donate a small portion of their check, which I would apply toward their room and board, or save to give back to them when they move out, depending on how my own circumstances were.

 

[redhen]

Quote:

 

[annaraven]

She opened up a little at the dinner table tonight. Told me she actually liked me better than her own mom. I did point out that I had never had to go through stuff with her like her mom did so that might affect her perception.

I used to take in people a lot. DH never has. So this is kindof a learning experience for him.

 

[jenesis536]

Where there is smoke there is fire, but it's possible you could be the blessing the girl has always needed. Encourage her and help her confidence-level improve, stick to your rules with your son and her. You are a good person for wanting to help, but trust your instincts because unfortunately there are a lot of people out there that don't want to be "recovered" and learn to do things on their own, they want to have people do it for them. I'm not saying that's your girl. Think about your son and how you raised him... if you can trust his judgment and are in the position to help her, then do what you can to get her on her feet. And talk a LOT.

 

[chickened]

I would confirm that she indeed is 18 and not a runaway. You can get in big trouble from parents/police for harboring a minor.