Need some prayers and some advice - PMs OK

[eastTNchick]

First of all, I'm so sorry.

I could have written your post almost 15 years ago except that I miscarried at 12-1/2 weeks instead of 5, and when I started bleeding heavily, I was told to go to the er and sat there from 8 p.m. until 2 a.m. before I was seen and then told that they "could not find the baby" and that I "must have passed it already". I was 17 at the time and due to be married in 2 weeks. DH & I did marry anyway and have been married for almost 15 years now with 3 beautiful children.

Yes, I know that you are older than I am, but I also wanted to say that we conceived our oldest daughter 6 months after we were married. We could have conceived again sooner, but wanted to wait a bit and grieve the loss of our first child.

I still remember that child and the day that I lost my darling child. That is something that will stay with you for the rest of your life.

The pain will ease with each passing day, but you will never forget the love you had for your little one. Allow yourself to grieve, but also remember that God has reasons for allowing things to happen. He may have a greater purpose for that little one with Him.

My heart goes out to you, and I will be praying for you during this time of loss.

Feel free to PM me if you want.

 

[hoosier]

sorry

I don't want to scare you or anything,

but my MIL miscarried her first pregnancy and she went on to have six miscarriages and six kids in twelve years!

Edited because I hit submit by mistake.

 

[wendy]

so sorry for you loss :aww i had a two year old daughter and found out i was pregnant, i miscarried at 12 weeks. there was alot of stress going on in my life and i thought it was that that caused it. but my DR said no. i chose to have a dnc and my doctor who had been my doctor for 6 years and delivered my first child sent the nurse away and stayed by my side as I came out of ansthesia. That meant alot to me. I will never forget that sweet gester, he did not have to do that. Prayers your way :aww

edited to say, that was 11 years ago, I even remember my due date. I went on to have 3 more children too. The due date the Dr told me for was my delivery date for my 2nd child a girl two years later(july 12, 1999, i was late they had given me july 3rd). AND I found I was pregnant with my 3rd child on that same day, july 12, 2004!

Wendy

 

[chick4chicks]

I am so very sorry to hear about the loss of your precious child. My thoughts and Prayers will be with You and Hubby to be. God Bless.

 

[werblessd1s]

So sorry for your loss, I'm sending you a PM.

 

[SpottedCrow]

I'm sorry for your loss...I feel for you...

I lost my daughter to miscarriage at 3+ months...I lost her just before Christmas so that time is very very hard for me...

It helps to have people who have been there to talk to, unlike my SIL who miscarried and my MIL said, "oh you're just having a bad period, let's go shopping".

It's alot more common than you think. My sister miscarried at 7 months and my best friend a few weeks in...

Tears, you're gonna cry aLOT! It's grief, but it's also hormonal...
Angry, Heck yes...you're gonna be like why me, and all that..
It's all perfectly normal to feel like this.

Again, my condolences.

That's a nice thing to have done, Keystone...

 

[LisaJean]

Quote:
That IS eerie! I wonder if 5 weeks is a sort of last gas moment in pregnancy?

I've been on the verge of tears for most of the day, today. Anything will set me off. I was at the grocery store buying food for my honeymooon, and the lady in front of me had baby food in her cart, and I lost it.

Just typing about it is making me cry, now.

I found the shirt I bought, with the word "Baby" and an arrow pointing at the stomach of the shirt. I was going to hold it up at the wedding reception as a way to announce we were pregnant. Seeing that shirt made me bawl.

My father cried. It's only the second time I've ever seen him cry.

Even my fiancee cried. I've NEVER seen him cry.

All this makes me terrified to try again, because what if we are even further along next time? It was hard enough losing what was in essence a clump of cells.

 

[wendy]

Prayers your way. So sorry!!! You just need time to grieve, you can't really think about the what if's. It will drive you crazy! I wish I had all the right words to say. But we are all here for you! God Bless

Wendy

 

[chickenma]

Crying is OK. Be sad when you want to be sad or feel sad.
I have 3 girls and if I wouldn't have them I would keep on trying to get them even if it would take me a lot of times trying to have them. It took me 6 years and a lot of tears.
If you and your husband would like to have kids . I would say go for it. Its worth al the tears in the world and the grief when you hold your little baby in your arms.
I will keep you and your family in my prai

r.

 

[crtrlovr]

Quote:
Sweetie, this is the part where I have to put my 2 cents in: no, it was NOT 'NOTHING'. This child was important to you, your fiance, and your friends and family. Grieve for your loss if you need to, and don't let fear become an emotional millstone around your neck. If you conceive again and have a healthy child, most sincere congratulations. If it doesn't take place, decide if this is really what you want, and find an alternative solution. Adopt a child, foster children, sponsor a child or children in another country; etc. God knows there are many children out there who need a loving home. JMO