Need some prayers and some advice - PMs OK

[Cetawin]

Oh hon it is so normal to be afraid to try again. I lost 9 babies (7 pregnancies) and had two wonderful children...don't give up.

Just take your time, do not worry about it and it will happen naturally. I was so stressed, running to specialists, taking my temp 20 times per day, eating this and that just to try to get pregnant and not miscarry...when I finally threw my hands up and said "Creator, it is your call...I am done" 3 months later I was pregnant and had a full-term healthy son.

It sounds hard to do and it can be but...just put it up to faith that what is meant to be will be.

Congrats on the marriage and accept my wishes for a wonderful lifetime with your new husband.

 

[seminolewind]

I think most miscarriages happen between 5-10 weeks. It's usually nature's way of saying that this one is not meant to be, something very wrong.
Good wishes for you and your wedding.

 

[65browneyes]

Just wanted to let you know I've been there, too. We all have a story, some are fairly similar, some totally unusual. I just sat here and typed mine, then deleted it all because I realize nobody wants to hear it, especially not you.

It's easy for people to minimize your situation because the fetus wasn't "real" to them. But, the moment a woman decides to become a mother, any potential fetus is as real as the moon and stars.

This was your baby, the result of the love you share with your man. And now, the child is gone, but not forgotten, not now, not ever. It's okay to be sad, it's okay to be angry, and it's okay to mourn. You will always mourn this loss. It will get easier, less painful over time, but there will always be a place in your heart that aches for this one.

I'm so very sorry that you and anybody else has to endure this kind of heart ache. But, please know you aren't alone, and even though it isn't the same, we are all here for you anytime you need to talk.

 

[CK Chickadilly]

Oh Sweet Pea, I am so sorry for your loss. I haven't been in your shoes but I feel so bad for you & your new hubby. Hopefully you can try again when you are ready.

On the positive side....you are getting married today! Look at it as a fresh new start. Good luck honey. I will say a special pray for you guys!
Cyn

 

[sundance]

CRTLOVR WROTE
Sweetie, this is the part where I have to put my 2 cents in: no, it was NOT 'NOTHING'. This child was important to you, your fiance, and your friends and family. Grieve for your loss if you need to, and don't let fear become an emotional millstone around your neck. If you conceive again and have a healthy child, most sincere congratulations. If it doesn't take place, decide if this is really what you want, and find an alternative solution. Adopt a child, foster children, sponsor a child or children in another country; etc. God knows there are many children out there who need a loving home. JMO


TOTALLY AGREE WITH CRTLOVR.
Sorry for your loss.Marrie

 

[SpottedCrow]

I have to agree with everyone else once again...
Don't be afraid to try again...My mother had me so upset because she was like you'll never carry blah blah your heart blah kill you blah blah blah...
Chicken SPLORT!
I have a lovely son now who's driving me nuts, but that's a teenager for you.

Being afraid is part of being human. It's perfectly normal.

Many hugs.

 

[Sammysmom]

I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a child, no matter what stage of gestation, is extremely painful. I agree with what others have said, the fear to try again is perfectly normal. As far as your age goes, DH and I tried to have children for 16 years, had 5 miscarriages, gave up and one year later I became pregnant again, sailed through the pregnancy(although I was constantly afraid) and gave birth to my son 2 weeks before I turned 40. More and more women are having children in their forties. Just give yourself time to heal. I know that, after every miscarriage, I swore I would not try again. The pain was just too much. Eventually though, the pain receded a bit and the desire to be a mother came back full force. My prayers and best wishes go out to you and your future hubby. Feel free to PM me if you like. Janine

 

[mom'sfolly]

Many of us have gone through this, mine was at 10 weeks. I had a lovely boy before and after my miscarriage. I'm sorry it happened to you. I think it is normal to be afraid about next time, but don't let it cripple you. Most miscarriages are one shot deals, and somewhere around 20% of pregnancies end in the first 12 weeks. This number may seem alarming, but it includes many women who did not know they were pregnant. But in way of consolation, there are an awful lot of us out there; and we all can sympathize, and let you know that children are still possible. You're not alone, and we all care. So very, very sorry.

 

[LisaJean]

I thought I would update this sad thread with some happy news.

We're 13 weeks in. Due in late June, 2010.

 

[mom'sfolly]

Many many congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!