Needing financial help! Wanting to move out.

urban dreamer

10 Years
Sep 28, 2009
Sherwood, AR
Me and my DF are getting married in six days. I want to be moved out by next year (or early next year). We currently live with his mother and family. Well, long story short-living with them is getting difficult. And I don't think our marriage will make it any easier. Fiancially, I make about 1000 a month and his income is very unpredictable and unreliable (anywhere from 200-500 a month). We have about 400 dollars worth of bills right now (phone/insurance/credit card/ect). I found a house about 45 minutes from work asking 186,900$. 10 acers of land with a barn and pond. It's a nice looking house and I have been asking questions about it. My question for ya'll is- do you think we could do it? I mean, could there be ANY way we could pull this off? Should we wait (grin and bear it) for DF to get a reliable full-time job (preferably) or a reliable part-time job?

I hate putting my personal financial stuff out there like that but I need help. I would talk to MIL but she isn't ready to "cut the umbilical cord" so to speak. How well off were you when you ventured off on your own? This will be our first home.
We financed around that much for our house and although insurance and taxes are different, we pay about $1600.00 a month for the house payment....
No, honestly I don't think there's anyway you can even think about buying that house.

You need to find a place to rent on your own and get out of the parent's house.
I borrowed money so we could get married. We did get an apartment right away, never having to live with in-laws. Living with someone else is difficult, even when everyone gets along.

I would suggest that you forget about buying a piece of property if it will be hard to do financially. That would be asking for trouble. Wait until things get easier for you. Everyone wants what they want, and they want it now! Those who wait will be much better off in the long run.

i purchased my house for 132,000 and the payment with ins. taxes, etc. was 940 a month.

Sorry but i just do not see where you are going to be able to do it. think about the electric bill, phone bill, etc.

is there a small apartment or house you can rent and get out on your own?
I don't think you could do it right's not only the house payment to think about, it's insurance, maintenance, higher utility bills, and property taxes. Renting can be a great way to keep your bills a little lower and save money for your first home.
I would suggest you save as much money as you can and wait for a little while before you go and buy a house. It wouldn't hurt for your DF to have a steady full time job either. They are stricter on the requirements for loan qualifications now. You don't want to be house poor, it isn't much fun. We lived with my DH's parents for a little over a year after we moved from out of state and it was difficult the first week we were there. We bought the first house that we could find near the school district we wanted the kids to go to out of desperation. The place we bought has 5.5 acres but is a fixer upper.... aka money pit. It was $100,000 and our payment with escrow (don't have to have the borrower's insurance or whatever it is called) is $780. I wish we would have done things differently, kind of like my brother. He and his GF saved fro a couple years put $15,000 down and were able to buy 10 acres and build the house that they wanted.
Do you pay rent with the in-laws? If you are accumulating credit card debt there is no way you can buy. Try to not use any credit and see how much a month you can save, this will help determine how much you can spend.
Thanks for the replys. I knew it was a long shot but I really am despriate to move out. I hate the idea of getting an apartment, especially with the nicer ones going for 600 a month. Many of the cheap rental houses around here are in neighboorhoods I don't even like to drive through (and won't stop in for nothing). The better rental houses are anywhere from 800-1000 in rent a month anyways so I figured I might as well look for a house I can buy instead of rent. This is so hard and fustrating. I'm lost. I do pay rent and the water bill for my in-laws. Credit card is paid off every month.
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You should head to the bank and get pre-approved for a loan, not for the purposes of getting the actual loan, but it will let you know how much "house" you can afford given your expenses and earnings as well as take into account how much the bank would loan you should you decide to buy anything. From the numbers that you gave, it seems like that house is too much of a stretch, especially if your husband-soon-to-be's income is variable. Remember that you're not only paying for the price of the home (and the interest) but EVERYTHING that needs to be fixed, installed, inspected, etc. It's a very big expense should something go wrong (and it eventually will). The very last thing you want at such a young age (or really any age) is to default on a loan, which will create many setbacks for you later on in life. Poor finances do not help a marriage, believe me. In the meantime, try to find a place that you can safely and comfortably afford and if your credit score is low, make sure you live within your means and pay off bills on time. It will help you buy a house later on. You might have to give up some luxuries to live away from parents but privacy, especially to a new couple, can be priceless.

Congratulations on your upcoming marriage and good luck!

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