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Needing financial help! Wanting to move out.

This is not saying this is your situation - this was MY situation....one of those learn from my mistake deals....

My dad likes to have weird bits of "advice" he spouts, that usually make no sense until you need it to. One was "Never marry someone without a financial report from them."

When I was younger and Oh So In Love, I married a guy with BAD credit, and a cruddy job. I had stellar credit (pushing 800), and a great job. We wanted a house in the country. Found one, on a couple acres, loved it, and went to buy it. Found out he couldn't be on the loan at all because of his credit. So, I bought it alone.

A few months later, we divorced. He was to pay me half of the mortgage and bills. Yeah right. He had bad credit for a reason. I left the house, moved close to my job. I paid a mortgage payment AND for an apartment, by myself. The housing market tanked, and I ended up foreclosing, because I couldn't sell a house I didn't want to live in (and was almost 100 miles from my work and family). I'm now stuck with BAD credit for a few more years until it falls off, and him? He doesn't have a whit of it on his neck. Course, he still can't pay a bill to save his life, so his credit is still jacked, but it ruined mine.

Moral of the story - get a financial report
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You guys are not able to get a house now, period. Both of you need to either go to school/back to school, and or get a better job or work two or three jobs. Get married when your "financial reports" are in good standing, not before.

(My now husband weren't going to get married until I had my credit straight again, but illness and pregnancy meant I had to quit my job and get on his insurance. It has caused some stress, because my poor credit has impacted him (higher insurance for our vehicles, we can't joint own anything that needs financing etc.) We now are finally getting it all cleaned up and paid off, as I'm back to work and able to start rebuilding my credit. It was a hard road.).

It takes a lot of money to make the world go round.
 
Okay, I haven't read the whole thread, but I believe you need to clear out debt, bolster up your savings, talk with some folks about what would be required to get a loan. Steady income yes - absoluately needed for housepayments. We're farmers and I know the ups and downs of good and bad years.....Also, if you are just feeling pinched on new couple space, look for ads for persons who might give free room/board in exchange for tenant space. Some farmers and others are doing that but be forewarned that at least you all know where you're living there. You might step into something not as good as "painted" and then where would you go?

I'd really try a "sit down" and house rules....Maybe MIL needs help with chores, etc. I have no clue but best wishes and I know that there is aweb resource something like clark howard radio show that gives excellent new home buyer tips. Congrats on the wedding and patience.....All those things we want right now, sometimes do take saving and planning for. Most of all I'll be praying for some peace in the household where you now reside! Have a blessed day. Nancy
 
Have to agree with the others, that I personally doubt if you're
in a position to buy a house just yet.

But don't feel bad.

Looking back, I would have to say that the best times my wife and
I had were the early years. When we didn't have much, the things
we did have really mattered. Gathered up furniture from family, or the
Goodwill. Yardsales.

I remember well borrowing money to buy her jewerly. Or a car...made
no difference. Had to borrow the money.

We didn't know how good our life was then.

It's a little different now. Walk into the jewerly store, they call us by name.
And it's anything she wants. Any day she wants it. Makes no difference what
she wants...it's hers the day she wants it.

You know the funny thing?

All that stuff doesn't matter in the end. Has no value. Nice pieces. But mere
babbles.

It's been the things we struggled for that ended up mattering the most.

It was the chase that mattered.

Congratulations on the marriage. May you have many happy years together.
Take time to enjoy life along the way.
 
I don't see any way possible for you to buy a house right now. I know in my area, the banks require 20% down. They are no longer financing 100%.

He needs to consider getting a full time job, so that he can provide more financial support. My home was only $50,000 and my payments are $545.00 a month. Which includes ins, etc. But, we bought a fixer upper, and we have had to put quite a bit of money into it. We do it as we go, which is much easier, in my opinion.
 
There are alternatives. Start saving now. Cut costs wherever you can. Pick up extra work. Reevaluate your wants and your needs. Cell phones, tvs, high speed internet- I'm here to tell you you can live without these and save real money. The general rule of thumb is that your housing should not cost more that one quarter of your monthly income. So if you are earning 1500 that would mean not more that $375 a month. Pretty hard to get a conventional home for that these days.

Personally as a single woman I bought a house on unskilled labor, aka not making much an hour. I worked 80 hours a week so I could buy my grandmother's house. At $139,000 my mortgage started off at $950, after a year the interests rates went down and I turned a 30 year loan into a 15 year loan for $1033 a month. It was paycheck to paycheck. No extras of any sort. The majority of my income went into the house, it still does. What made it work? Commitment. Keeping track of finances. Not being unrealistic. Making sure the house was a good value. Built well, no major repair needs. A stable job. Willingness to work extra. The good news, in 7 years my home will be paid off and I won't even be 50 yet. That will leave more money to buy more chickens.
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So, do your homework. Look around more. Find something smaller maybe, or buy a piece of land and an RV and build something to suit your needs bit by bit. Think outside the box. Choose to do something that you can afford or it will put a strain on your marriage. Think of the time you spend with your inlaws as a chance to gather financial security. Plan wisely and you will have the best outcome. Whatever you decide make sure you can follow through with all the steps needed to make it a success.

Best of luck!!!

Check out some of these alternatives.

http://www.habitat.org/getinv/apply.aspx
http://www.amazon.com/Mortgage-Free-Radical-Strategies-Ownership-Living/dp/0930031989
http://www.tinygreencabins.com/CabinModels/wildflower.htm
 
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