In the desert, the price of water and AC kills. If you go NM, get an evap cooler (called swamp coolers sometimes) they're way cheaper to run and you'll want the humidity as well. Winter isn't much of a deterrant as we thought, truth is I just don't leave the house much, the wheelchair is a freeking hassle, and both of us work from home, the kids are homeschooled, and I already only use the market maybe 2 times a month (you should see the way I shop, 6 weeks of food at once, so I don't need to do it again? check.) I'll miss the longer growing season, but I can't get my wheelchair into the garden as is, so a shorter season, but having the room to plant will be lovely (boyd and mr saddi talked about some raised box gardens so I can plant again.
I'm pretty estranged from my family, and the only tie I still have in Ca, is my son's sweetheart. She wants to move with us (and I think her parents would let her), but they're too young.