I just got really, really speechless mad, Ya'll can just ignore this. Really.
6 years of college, twice delayed due to the finances and reality of small children/babies. Finally graduate, get a job 5 months later.
2 months shy of getting my state license, my health has a major meltdown. A misdiagnosed/mistreated chronic problem flared. I nearly died several occasions, only well afterwards realizing that. Forced to quit my job.
So, almost ten years later.
Most days I can be out of bed now, a major improvement. Still lots and lots of pain. Random breathing or allergic meltdowns due to exposure to a gazillion triggers. At least I've avoided the ER this week (almost...). Got my second epidural just a few days ago - now there's some fun. The air quality is in the orange zone yet again, so I'm supposed to stay indoors. With the nerve problem, I'm only supposed to go 20 mins tops on the computer.
HOW THE (&(**%#$@$^% am I supposed to find a job these days? I feel completely useless. Really. And, since I am the only one at this place without a job, every little thing is left for good ol' me to take care of. And if I'm sick for even a day, everything's a wreck. Literally, not a dish gets done. And if the new pup has accidents? well, everyone is in to much of a hurry to get out the door for work to clean up - left for me. Who, as they well know is really, really allergic to dogs. I just spent an hour scrubbing the floor and popping drugs. Who had to walk the poor pup at dawn when everyone who had paying jobs rushed out? I could go on way, way too long.
I really sometimes just want to throw my few things in the truck and go to Alaska. Oh, wait. Not my truck. It's in someone else's name 'cause I was too sick to go to the bank to sign the papers.
I am having a BAD day. I'll probably come back and delete this later. MFTS2BB.
6 years of college, twice delayed due to the finances and reality of small children/babies. Finally graduate, get a job 5 months later.
2 months shy of getting my state license, my health has a major meltdown. A misdiagnosed/mistreated chronic problem flared. I nearly died several occasions, only well afterwards realizing that. Forced to quit my job.
So, almost ten years later.
Most days I can be out of bed now, a major improvement. Still lots and lots of pain. Random breathing or allergic meltdowns due to exposure to a gazillion triggers. At least I've avoided the ER this week (almost...). Got my second epidural just a few days ago - now there's some fun. The air quality is in the orange zone yet again, so I'm supposed to stay indoors. With the nerve problem, I'm only supposed to go 20 mins tops on the computer.
HOW THE (&(**%#$@$^% am I supposed to find a job these days? I feel completely useless. Really. And, since I am the only one at this place without a job, every little thing is left for good ol' me to take care of. And if I'm sick for even a day, everything's a wreck. Literally, not a dish gets done. And if the new pup has accidents? well, everyone is in to much of a hurry to get out the door for work to clean up - left for me. Who, as they well know is really, really allergic to dogs. I just spent an hour scrubbing the floor and popping drugs. Who had to walk the poor pup at dawn when everyone who had paying jobs rushed out? I could go on way, way too long.
I really sometimes just want to throw my few things in the truck and go to Alaska. Oh, wait. Not my truck. It's in someone else's name 'cause I was too sick to go to the bank to sign the papers.
I am having a BAD day. I'll probably come back and delete this later. MFTS2BB.
