(NOT AN ENTRY…I just wanted to shame my boy here lmao no rest for the dead)
“I used to show the girls awesome nesting places in the safest (most inconvenient and inaccessible) places. Oh, and I would stalk and attack the calves of all guests who just wanted to see my owner’s garden. They should have listened when she said to watch out for me, heh”
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(RIP Camembert. Is it the ultimate shame to be turned into pâté and soup? I didn’t want to do it, but you were a jerk to my kids and guests. Your meat was dark and tasted like turkey. Your huevos were bigger than your heart. Your sons are jerks just like you, but your daughters are the sweetest (pic with my kid) They must take after their mamas
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