Q for parents out there, about potty training

[patandchickens]

I know this is a chicken forum not child-rearing, but I figure there are lots of moms and dads here and I bet some good advice, so, hope you don't mind me picking your brains...

What is your experience with letting the child decide for himself whether he needs to visit the toilet versus telling him "ok it's been 3 hours now and you're standing with your legs crossed so you need to go try and see what happens". This is a 3 1/3 yr old who after a week is 'mostly' trained, at least with constant reminders.

I don't want accidents and neither does Harry, but OTOH I do want him to learn to pay attention *himself* and not just rely on Mom's prompting, you know?

Not looking for theory... looking for actual experiences and advice based on same

Thanks in advance,

Pat

 

[hsm5grls]

Potty training has it's up and downs. Sometimes they make it and sometimes they don't. Every child is different. I have had one that was potty trained at one and others that took what seemed like forever.
Try not reminding him and see what happens. If it works there you go and if not try something diff.
One thing I have to say is I HATE pull ups. They just let the little accidents happen and no one notices. A wet butt a few times usually gets the point across. I say let him give it a go.

 

[arlee453]

I vote to keep reminding him when you see the obvious signs he has to go - you know the 'gotta go potty' dance...

Kids are like puppies - if they are busy doing something they don't like to take a break to go potty even when they KNOW they need to.

By now, he knows what it feels like to have to go, but he may not have an accurate idea of how long he can 'hold' it once he has to go.

This is my 2c worth - I've potty trained my 4 boys - and even now (youngest just turned 5, others are 7 & 9) I have to remind them once in a while to take a break and GO when I see them bouncing around holding themselves...

 

[mom'sfolly]

I agree with arlee, most kids need reminders. It takes them awhile to get what the feelings mean and when they are involved in something, may not pay attention to the feeling. My guys had most of their accidents while playing outside, they just were having to much fun to notice that it was time to go. You will also have the accidents right outside the bathroom door, because they don't neccessarily judge how badly they have to go. At 3 1/2 a reminder every four hours or so won't hurt, besides during that kinda time you should have some obvious potty break times, i. e. "go potty and wash your hand before lunch" or "before you go out to play, use the bathroom".

With my first son we did alot of "toity targets", it made it fun and improved his aim. His younger brother couldn't aim worth a darn, and I still remind him to "TURN THE LIGHT ON". Six-year-old boys, no lights, pee....you can guess the result...bless his little heart.

 

[cknmom]

I went through all this with my three, several kids I babysat, and our DGDmy DD has been calling me for several years for advice as each of hers get to the age. I agree to remind him occassionally. I still have to urge my DGD who is 9yrs.to go, she gets zoned on what she is doing and doesn't want to stop.
I don't know if they still have it available but I got a potty training kit from the charmin toilet paper web site. If they don't still have it, you could make one up. It had a poster about the different steps; make it to the bathroom, go potty, wipe, flush, wash hands. You hang it in the bathroom so they look at it as they go and it helps them to remember what else to do. It also had a sheet that every time they did a step, they got a sticker. After getting so many stickers(I don't remember how many) they got a treat! That hepled my DGD, she loved to get the stickers and felt proud of herself when she remembered all the steps. Also we had a potty chair for her that was a NASCAR one so that whenever she peed, she would hear racecar sounds, she has always LOVED cars,harleys and racing!!
Hope some of this might help.

Monica

 

[poppycat]

Boys are tough, they'd rather be doing just about anything than sitting on the potty. In my experience though they will be potty trained when THEY are ready. My youngest son was four and a half

when he finally went consistently without reminders.

My sister has a son that is the same age as mine (her first) she went the reminder route. I went the you-pee-on-the-floor-you-clean-up-the-mess route. Our boys are nearly seven now and she is STILL reminding.

But you know what? It doesn't matter at all now. Once it's done it's done.

 

[Wildsky]

You do need to remind them in the early days - I have to remind my kids, they get so involved in something they don't think about it until they don't have TIME to get to the toilet...

 

[Rosalind]

My mother swears by the bribery method. She says any kid can be potty-trained in a week, and mostly trained after a 3-day weekend, by one simple technique.

Every time the kid sits on the toilet, s/he gets a cookie/treat. Doesn't matter if s/he does anything in it or not. Continue this for 3 days. Thereafter, give treats only for doing something in the potty. Thing is, you have to be really consistent and give the treat every single time. You can't not give a treat because you're busy cooking dinner or BYC posting.

You have to be right there holding out a cookie after the pants are pulled up. Pretty much, you take a 3-day weekend and do hardly anything else other than hand out cookies. The cookies don't have to be Oreos or anything unhealthy, you can use whatever the kid thinks is a treat, or find those health store type of cookies that have applesauce and stuff in them.

Worked on me, several cousins, my niece and nephew, and every dog we ever had. I don't have a single relative my age or younger who was not completely 100% potty-trained by age 2 1/2. I swear, none of us were ever psychologically harmed by it either, we all turned out normal. Okay, maybe not me personally, but I promise all my cousins are way more normal than I am...

 

[helmstead]

My daughter (30 months) has finally gotten to the point to the point that she will always tell me that she needs to pee and is learning to poop in the toilet. I was so proud at the grocery the other day when she was able to even hold it about 15 mins while we checked out.

I remind her still, if I know it's been awhile. I don't think they should be fully responsible until they've had a lot of practice.

 

[patandchickens]

Sorry its belated but I just wanted to say a big THANK YOU to everyone who posted on this thread. It's very much appreciated. I am, indeed, continuing to remind him when it seems likely to me that he has to 'go', and it almost always works, and he has been entirely dry (although not unpooey) for some days now, woooo. So I think y

...haha, I was interrupted just now writing this, believe it or not, by Harry coming to tell me he had to go pee! no kidding. lol...

...I think your advice to keep reminding him when it seems necessary must be the way to go.

Thanks again,

Pat