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- #21
I have gotten some wonderful advice on this thread, and I plan to heed it. Should the topic come up again, and I fear it will sooner rather than later, I will have to carefully explain why I still, after all these years, say no. I just don't want to lose him as a friend. `The last time I said no, he disappeared for a few months, and avoided me. This time I'm afraid he might disappear for longer, or for good, and I don't think that's fair to me. But I'm not going to settle just out of convenience. I need better, I deserve better, and for now I'm just going to do as I've been doing for the last year, I'll keep focusing on my degree and graduation, and IF someone great comes into my life, then fantastic! B. has a lot of growing up still to do, and he needs to change his ways completely if he ever expects to find someone that will love him the way he wants and needs to be loved. He has to stop being a mooch, and stop spoiling his daughter the way he does. No woman can compete with that. Not that she should have to compete with his daughter, that's what I'm saying, but with the constant showering of gifts and the attention, and the pedestal she's been placed upon, THAT'S what is impossible to compete with, not his love for her. In my house MY kids come first. And I have to keep them first as long as they are in my care, and I couldn't imagine my kids having to play second fiddle to a step sibling any more than I could expect the step child to play second fiddle to my kids. I believe in equality in the household, and would love all the children in it, whether they were mine or not, but I need someone that thinks the same way I do. So it's back to the bookwork for me, graduation is only a few months away. After that, who knows? I do hope to someday (sooner rather than later) meet someone great that will be good for me AND my kids. That would just be the icing on the cake that is my life.
