So glad you are reunited with Ruby and that she's okay. And that you are hanging in there too _ i say if you enjoy that drink of yours, it's a good thing
Yea, you guys were right, she was fine! I'm so glad. I just checked on them, and they're all tucked in. All five of them.
I still feel the same way as I did this morning. Not much changed, it didn't get worse, and I just hung out today. Small aches here and there in my legs, but not too bad. But I did feel more energetic if I did get up and do things. So that's what I did. I would do a little something and then go rest. I ate light all day, basically nibbled on good foods all day and drank water a lot and my vitamin water. So far, so good. Hopefully I'll have a non eventful night and we'll see what tomorrow brings. The port site is annoying though, tender with a burning sensation. Every time I looked in the mirror I saw that thing, and if I didn't see it I felt it.
The psychological side is worse than the physical side. Every time I look in the mirror I see the scar on the side of my right breast but I can say I'm alive and live with it then cover it up. But then I look in the mirror, even after 18 years and I see a face I wasn't born with and it just bothers me so much no matter how I think about. The pain has been gone a long time, but the deadness reminds me every day that I'll never be the same. I turned down counseling and I wish I hadn't. If you need to see a counselor to deal with at any time, do it! We are here for you too, but sometimes you need a stranger to sit and listen objectively to you.
I'm doing pretty good. I never got worse in the ache department and my stomach and intestines were fine too. It's almost like I really didn't have chemo. But I know I did, and it's kinda messing with me today. I feel like a little depressed. Go figure, I should be glad I didn't suffer too much physically, so I don't understand the mental thing....I'm trying to work through it and keep myself busy and try not to think too much about it. Weird though. I thought I'd come on here and give you all an update, but I'm gonna leave soon and do a little sewing in a bit.
My appetite is wonkers, I expected that, and it's no biggy, I'll just eat small portions all day and kind of what I want. And LOTS of plain water and vitamin water. I also picked up some B-12 tabs and taking them every day.