So....talk about.....CANCER SUPPORT THREAD !!

[annie3001]

hello,
After having another thread re: my aunt having cancer. My father has come to me and revealed she has lung cancer. I am devasted to say the least. She was so close to our family growing up. My father says she doesnt want visistors, but its like he told me finally (after me knowing...long story) Like she's declining. She never smoked in her life, and is such a good hearted person. This really stinks. My cousins are also heavy on my mind. As I may call my cousin and offer support where needed. Its been just about 2 months since she has been receiving treatment. She had to have a blood transfusion not too long ago, just last week actualy. She is now wearing a wig. I just cant stop thinking about her. Yet I know she needs her own family first. Its been a good year since we have seen her last. I went thru google/yahoo and researched lung cancer, its so scary.
Just wanted to come in here and share my story.

pray for her and her family that they will have peace soon.


Heres my org thread.

My husband spills the beans so to speak yesterday and tells me my favorite aunt has cancer. my father told him. over a month ago, and asked my husband not to tell me, because the family doesnt want anyone to find out? roll
gee thats kinda important. i am over come with sadness, that i cant call my cousins and my aunt. i dont even know what kind of cancer it is. she has always been a special aunt in my life.
a little background.... my parents are divorced and this aunt (who has the cancer) was sooo close to my mother.
so i want to naturally pick up the phone and call my mother and tell her. but i promised my husband i wouldnt.
with cancer, i have heard, it can come and you could be gone in less than 2 weeks. then i feel i would have missed the chance to see her one more time.
ill see my dad when he comes to the house tomorrow. should i mention it to him or wait for him to tell me?? this aunt is my fathers brothers wife.
i dont have a big mouth, nor do i put tons of stuff up on facebook. i feel everyone should know...i dunno... privacy for them i suppose. i just found out yesterday and cant stop thinking about her.

To make matters worse, yesterday while at work a co-worker who is very admired, told me she has throat cancer. her spirits are very high, i admire her. however, she has yet to tell her 2 children?? she is due for raditation pills some time in the next few days... she doesnt want to worry her children (who are in their 20's))

I wake up this morning, sip my coffee and feel so depressed and sad. I am thankful for my family, my kids , my husband. but had such a rough night sleeping, now i am getting a headacke.
I am off to work in 40 minutes or so,,,, to a job (today i am working alone))) to a room (that i am in alone in))) gosh i only wish i could be busy. anyways, off i got to finish the coffee. good day everyone, hopefully y'all have a better day than me. sad

 

[Pumpkinpup]

annie3001,

I am so very sorry to hear this news about your aunt. It is a very difficult situation when the terminal cancer patient does not wish for anyone to know. You are very torn between honoring their wishes and trying to make the most of the time that is left. We are not given a time and date to know when our last moments will be, therefore, it's very hard for us to sit back and not say anything when ther is the distinct possibility that we may wait too long to say "I love you and you meant so much to me."
I pray that you find an answer to that delima that gives you peace in your heart. I also pray that your aunt as well as your entire family remain strong and come through this knowing that you did what you could and that it was the right thing to do. I don't know if I could prevent myself from going to see her just for a moment if nothing else to tell her how important she is to me and that wanted her to know. You do what you feel in your heart is the right thing and what you can live with. It's far to easy to have to say "I wish" later on.

We are here for you as a community of those who have battled with this monster in many ways. Some are patients, some are survivors, some are family members and friends .....
We all have the common thread that it has touched our lives and we have had to find ways to deal with it. This thread is a very good place to find the caring support that you need. Welcome and I hope that we can help in some small way. Bless you!

 

[annie3001]

thank you pumpkinpup

your kindness has filled my heart. I will let her be, till she wants company that is. The sad reality is, I may never get to say goodbye if in fact it reaches that moment. I do find comfort in this thread, I have been reading for awhile on this thread and you are all so strong. thank you.

 

[farmchic]

Hello. I am new to your Forum and this is my first post. I've been lurking for a while and am very appreciative of the wonderful information that I've found on chickens. When I saw your post about Cancer support I felt that I had to respond to you.

I was diagnosed with breast cancer a little over 4 years ago. My whole world turned upside down. I had surgery, chemo and then radiation and I've lived to tell about it

I am still here! My hair and eyelashes grew back. Somedays, I can almost go a whole day with out remembering what happened to me in 2007. I am currently on an adjuvant chemo pill that I began after the radiation finished and I will be required to take for 5 years. It has it's own set of side effects...one of them being uterine cancer. This past summer I began to demonstrate some of those symptoms, and my docs (who have taken wonderful care of me and watch me very closely) suggested a hysterectomy. I had than done the end of July, got 6 weeks off work to sit in the sun and watch my chickens, and now I am back to work like nothing happened. I've really learned that no matter what happens, life does go on.

I know that you are very scared, sad, disbelieving, angry, sad, frightened, sad, worried. So, I want to give you a really big (((((HUG))))) and tell you to breathe. It will be ok. I would suggest that you read everying that you can get your hands on, but don't dwell too much any anthing from any one article. Start a list of questions that you want to ask your doctor. Cry. Pray. And talk to anyone that will listen. Start a notebook where you can keep all of the info and notes you will collect. Keep everything together and easy to access, and bring it to each and every doctor appointment. Those notes and info can help quite a bit during the times that you aren't quite sure what you thought you were told.

I was knocked to my knees when I was given my diagnosis and first began my Cancer journey. Nothing in my life prepared me for what I was about to experience. I never thought it could happen to me. But it did. I was very fortunate to encounter some really special people that assisted me in my journey. Some are still will me, and some are not. But again, our lives go on. About two weeks after I got my diagnosis there was a terrible car crash about 2 miles from my home. A wonderful woman (wife & mother) was instantly killed when an 18 year old boy made a mistake and ran a stop sign. I realized then that no matter what was going to happen to me, I would rather have the opportunity to battle my cancer, love my husband and children, appreciate my family and friends and ENJOY every single additional breath that I was given, than get in my car one morning and simply not ever come home from work again. Although we all know that tomorrow is not guaranteed to us we all mostly take tomorrow for granted. I guess that's human nature. The cancer journey taught me not to take anything for granted. Live every experience, even the unpleasant ones, because they are all part of what makes you the wonderful and unique woman that you are.

Know that you can do this. It probably won't be easy, but we are never given more that we are able to handle. I will watch for your posts to see how you are doing. I will also hold you in my prayers.

Oh, and yes, you already have a wonderful source of comfort and healing in your backyard. Chickens are a wonderful source of humor and relaxation.

God Bless you!

 

[Pumpkinpup]

farmchic ,

Welcome to BYC and the cancer support thread! Your post was very touching and you summed it up very well. Thank you for sharing with us.

annie3001.

you are a strong woman. Bless you and if you need us, we are here to share in this with you.

 

[deerman]

farmchic..

and well put.......we all have to go one day....but the one thing Cancer as taught me..........live each day to its best,and let all that you love know you do.

As bad as cancer is......all those that have won their battle.......are alot better person because what they went thru....

 

[CoyoteMagic]

Quote:
I'm so sorry to hear about your Aunt and your co-worker. I sure your father and your husband were just trying to protect you from the pain of dealing with this. Some folks just want to shut out the world and fight the battle alone. Honestly, I couldn't do that. I've needed everybody on this thread to help me get through this. My honest opinion, if you want to find out about how your Aunt is really doing, call your Uncle. Tell him how your feel and about your need to see her if she is going to be passing soon. Lung Cancer is scary, I lost my brother to it. He had a lot of factors that could have led to it, smoker, fireman, worked with asbestos. When he was diagnosed, one lung was already nearly totally destroyed and part of the other. He lasted 2 months after diagnosis. Lung cancer is hard to treat as it is usually pretty advanced by the time it's found. "Gone in less than 2 weeks", yeah I had a friend diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and was gone in a week and a half. No outward signs until it was too late. If they won't let you see her, write her a letter, send a card, a dancing telegram, anything that will tell her that you care.

You're co-workers kids are going to know something is up if they maintain any kind of contact. Her voice is definately going to go through some changes and they are going to pick up on that. She will probably loose weight because her throat is too tender to eat. She needs to be ready to fight. Pull in support people from where ever she can. Folks here will tell you that I can be a real "B" when it comes to this monster. People who are "why me" make me insane!! Doesn't matter why, it is what it is, deal with it or get out of the way of us who are. She needs to get mad and really kick cancers arse!! Not telling her kids may come back to bite her in the end.

For you, learn all that you can. DO NOT be afraid of it. It's not contagious. It's like AIDS. You can't get it by giving someone a hug, holding their hand, or sitting by their side as they pour out their tears. Go after the politicians in your area to support research. Support medical treatments that are not socially acceptable--Medical Marijuana. It works, just ask Sara. She wouldn't be here without it.

Jump on the bandwagon with the rest of us and fight, fight, fight!!!!

 

[Lunachick]

Quote:
I'm so sorry to hear about your Aunt and your co-worker. I sure your father and your husband were just trying to protect you from the pain of dealing with this. Some folks just want to shut out the world and fight the battle alone. Honestly, I couldn't do that. I've needed everybody on this thread to help me get through this. My honest opinion, if you want to find out about how your Aunt is really doing, call your Uncle. Tell him how your feel and about your need to see her if she is going to be passing soon. Lung Cancer is scary, I lost my brother to it. He had a lot of factors that could have led to it, smoker, fireman, worked with asbestos. When he was diagnosed, one lung was already nearly totally destroyed and part of the other. He lasted 2 months after diagnosis. Lung cancer is hard to treat as it is usually pretty advanced by the time it's found. "Gone in less than 2 weeks", yeah I had a friend diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and was gone in a week and a half. No outward signs until it was too late. If they won't let you see her, write her a letter, send a card, a dancing telegram, anything that will tell her that you care.

You're co-workers kids are going to know something is up if they maintain any kind of contact. Her voice is definately going to go through some changes and they are going to pick up on that. She will probably loose weight because her throat is too tender to eat. She needs to be ready to fight. Pull in support people from where ever she can. Folks here will tell you that I can be a real "B" when it comes to this monster. People who are "why me" make me insane!! Doesn't matter why, it is what it is, deal with it or get out of the way of us who are. She needs to get mad and really kick cancers arse!! Not telling her kids may come back to bite her in the end.

For you, learn all that you can. DO NOT be afraid of it. It's not contagious. It's like AIDS. You can't get it by giving someone a hug, holding their hand, or sitting by their side as they pour out their tears. Go after the politicians in your area to support research. Support medical treatments that are not socially acceptable--Medical Marijuana. It works, just ask Sara. She wouldn't be here without it.

Jump on the bandwagon with the rest of us and fight, fight, fight!!!!

Wow!

You go girl!!

I couldn't add anything to that! Well said Coyote.

 

[CoyoteMagic]

Quote:
Welcome to the Funny Farm! Love your attitude. I've been doing this for 3 years. Original diagnosis June of 2008 with HER2++++ Breast Cancer. Chemo and boob job a year of treatment. Within a year it was back. Now I take an adjunct treatment every 3 weeks to try to keep it at bay. (Pills made me ill

) I know no other way, but to fight. When it comes to humor, I'm as warped as they come, lol

 

[annie3001]

thank you coyotemagic,
I saw my dad today, asked him if it was alright to send her a card at least. He said that would be a nice idear. Everyone in the family now knows about her.
I sent the card right away. She should get it tomorrow. I feel some relief knowing she would know I am thinking of her at this time of need.
This thread as I mentioned before, has some very strong women, (many) and men too. You are all so brave! thank you. my work supported breast cancer awareness in the month of october, we raised 20,000.00 from our little ct. airport. I am so proud! Anyways, off to bed I best go.. Night night.