Some days are just too much

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by dragonshiner, Jun 18, 2008.

  1. dragonshiner

    dragonshiner Songster

    Mar 20, 2008
    NE Wisconsin
    I knew before moving here that going from the city to the country would be difficult and in fact it has been. But having these chickens and ducks and pheasants and the whole slew of poultry that we've acquired over this short period of time has really given me a sense of purpose lately. I look forward to waking up early in the morning to feed the birds and set the ducks out to free range. I just spend the morning in the coop, about a half hour I'd say, just tossing corn, petting the chicks that run around my feet waiting for things to drop, oh and playing "The Game" with Kuri.
    Kuri is my favorite, and currently only, rooster and Loves to jump for morsels that I hold in the air a good two or three feet above his head.
    As you might be able to tell I have a serious connection to my poultry. Despite the fact that many of them are being raised for meat. We have already culled some members of the flock and it was very difficult for me the first few times and still gives me a twinge of sadness to this day. But I'd rather morn the loss of an animal than be desensytized to its death.
    Which made today especially hard. We hve a second batch of chicks that we had ordered and are raising, but today ten of them died inexplicably. We have several theories as to what happened and I cleaned out the coop completely in case of a spreading disease. Since these babies were only a couple weeks old I'm not really broken up by thier passing. We did what we could. Today though, Little Wade also left us.
    Little Wade was one of my first ducklings. When we first got the chickens I pushed for months to get ducks because I love them so much. Finally my fiance cracked and gave me the go ahead at a fur and feather swap. I picked out 8 ducklings and had successfully raised them all to be 7 weeks of age. I though I was in the clear but Little Wade repeatedly hurt her leg over the last week and a half fluctuating from bad to good. Finally it took a severe turn for the worse yeaterday and by the time I came home from work today she was gone. I put so much time effort and personal attention and love into raising her and her siblings that this passing just hit me the hardest of any yet.
    i know that on a farm the comings and goings of life and death are going to be far more visible than what you find in the city. Part of me hopes that as the years go on it will get easier. But I really don't want it to get easier. I want to every life on this farm to have meaning to it, and when it is time to shed a tear, say a prayer, remember them fondly even if they be birds. I just hope I have strength to do it.

    I just needed to get this off my chest. thank you
  2. herbsherbsflowers

    herbsherbsflowers Songster

    May 25, 2008
    Covington, GA
    I guess this may be why some people were glad to leave the farm and fell so easily into the trap of letting other people do the hard things for them. It is easier for the folks at Tyson to kill my chickens and I don't have to think about it. But then I have given up all control of the quality of meat and the quality of the life of the chicken. So hang in there. I can say all this because I have not gotten to that point yet. We have our first 10 chicks, and they are only 4 weeks old. But I am preparing myself for it. We are going to keep the hens and one rooster. It is looking right now like we will have 3 extra roosters and that will be our first test when they get big enough to harvest. After that we will raise a clutch or two each year to eat. That won't be all the meat we eat in a year. We have a source for grass fed, humanely butchered beef in the county where we live. But we will be eating less meat than we have before.
  3. DuckLady

    DuckLady Administrator

    Jan 11, 2007
    NE Washington State
    I am very sorry about Wade.
    It seems that no matter why we are raising our animals...for pets....for eggs...for meat...for just because, there is always that one, that special one that steals our heart. With a look, with a peep, with a certain tilt of the head, that one brings a smile to our face when we think of her, who melts our hearts. That one becomes above the rest and is our one.
    And it is hard to see them go.

    I am so sorry. [​IMG]
  4. chickbea

    chickbea Songster

    Jan 18, 2007
    I'm so sorry. Sadly, part of loving animals means we need to be ready to lose them, and that just seems so unfair.
  5. Quote:[​IMG] :aww

    Sorry to hear about Wade. Loved hearing about The Game!
  6. Lunachick

    Lunachick Chicken Slave

    Mar 19, 2007
    Brick, NJ
    Sorry you lost your little duck. It's hard when you lose one of your animals, but I think it worth the heartache, to enjoy those little creatures when they are with us and being loved and cared for by people like you.
  7. goatkeepers

    goatkeepers Songster

    Mar 31, 2008
    Mooresville, NC
    I'm really sorry to hear about Little Wade. It really is hard, living on a farm. There will always be animals dying around you. Surprisingly, for me it has gotten a little easier. But I still cry, nonetheless. [​IMG]
  8. ChickenToes

    ChickenToes Songster

    May 14, 2008
    NE Wisconsin
    It's never easy to lose an animal. I still remember feeling miserable when we lost our first chick.
  9. MissPrissy

    MissPrissy Crowing

    May 7, 2007
    Forks, Virginia
    It is never easy. I am so sorry. [​IMG]

    Why can't you be my neighbor?
  10. dragonshiner

    dragonshiner Songster

    Mar 20, 2008
    NE Wisconsin
    Wow, seriously, wow! Thank you all so much for the kind words and hugging emoticons:) Yesterday was a tough one for me, however I still have close to two hundred other children who need me to care for them so I'm picking up and moving on. I am taking what I've learned with me and took some extra time in the coop with Kuri.
    LOL some of the little chicks who are only six or seven weeks are enthralled by the game and one of the sultans tried to jump for a treat today. But being that he's only 4-5 inches tall right now he couldn't get very far so I had to lower the treat for him. I'm taking it as a good omen.[​IMG]

BackYard Chickens is proudly sponsored by: