stupid SIL

[cap1717]

I suspect that a whole bunch of us are "wanna be" farmers, or farm wives. . . there is something secure and comforting about growing one's own food, having a "specie diverse" household, being kind to all of the many "beings" in ones life. . . and that "something" can get lost pretty fast in a fast paced urban lifestyle. So. . . take time to smell the roses, stroke the chicken, play with the cat and love the dog. . . also children, neighbors, and anyone else who wanders into your path. . . .

 

[fowltemptress]

If I'd received that message from a relative I would have taken it as a playful message, and written something back like, "I know, crazy sisters unite!" You're in the best position to judge whether it was meant meanly or not, of course. I think this is an interesting post, because it has never before occurred to me that "crazy" could be meant to be insulting. My family members would seem to despise each other in that case.

Chicken people are, of course, the craziest non-crazies out there. Happy to be one of them!

 

[Whispering Winds]

Quote:
That is so true, I canned 14 quarts of gorgeous green beans/shelly's yesterday, first time I have been able to do it for years, and the sight of those jars on my bar just makes my heart sing!!! I don't care what family or friends think, THIS is the way we are suppose to live.

 

[lisahaschickens]

I'm totally with Fowltemptress.

I took that completely as a loving, joking comment. That is how all my friends and family interact with each other. It's all meant with real love. It's not fake or mean. I think it partially depends where you're from. When I went to college in Upstate New York (I'm from California), nobody got my humor and people were confused or insulted quite often. It took a long time for us to understand each other.

Unless you have real reason to believe that your SIL is really and truly being mean to you... I would give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that she's just being silly and means it with love. If it were my friends or family, that most definitely would be the case! Crazy in a good way! I know I am!

 

[georgialee]

Quote:
If it was said by any of my other family/friends I would have taken it jokingly... just not by her. She says things with no care in the world about whether it will hurt someone's feelings. Like she said that she wouldn't ever even consider buying a house as small as mine for her first home (mine is 1500 sf. and she rents). She's also said that maybe when we build a new house (ie bigger/better) i'd want to entertain for a holiday... as if the house now is a shack. It's 2 yrs old! She was so rude to MIL... MIL asked SIL for a recipe and she said 'no.. it's a secret recipe if someone else has it I won't be the only making the best pulled pork'... and she calls it her "world famous pulled pork". AND she has a 'world famous chocolate cake' as well. She was lying to me and acting like her and my bio-mom were talking all the time (to make me jealous, which it wouldn't have) which they weren't. ... I could go on and on and on. I no longer take what she says as a joke or being silly - it's just downrigt rude.

 

[lisahaschickens]

ah, gotcha. Yes, she does sound yucky. Sorry about that! I guess she knows that it sounds like a cute joke to the outside world but that you are aware that she's really being mean. That's too bad. She's probably just jealous of you for some reason. I've found jealousy is often what causes behavior like that.

My thought is that you should just ignore her.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

Quote:
Agreed! If she acts this way to most people, or to the people she seems to enjoy and is closest to (or wants to be), then it is simply a part of her personality, no matter how grating you find it. If you are singled out for catty remarks, it is something different, but it certainly didn;t sound that way to me. DILs often want to get close to their MILs--they are family.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

Quote:
If it was said by any of my other family/friends I would have taken it jokingly... just not by her. She says things with no care in the world about whether it will hurt someone's feelings. Like she said that she wouldn't ever even consider buying a house as small as mine for her first home (mine is 1500 sf. and she rents). She's also said that maybe when we build a new house (ie bigger/better) i'd want to entertain for a holiday... as if the house now is a shack. It's 2 yrs old! She was so rude to MIL... MIL asked SIL for a recipe and she said 'no.. it's a secret recipe if someone else has it I won't be the only making the best pulled pork'... and she calls it her "world famous pulled pork". AND she has a 'world famous chocolate cake' as well. She was lying to me and acting like her and my bio-mom were talking all the time (to make me jealous, which it wouldn't have) which they weren't. ... I could go on and on and on. I no longer take what she says as a joke or being silly - it's just downrigt rude.

okay, sounds like she has no social skills, and was perhaps raised with a different idea than you about privacy (the secret recipe).

 

[redhen]

I remember the chocolate cake recipe thread!

Just ignore her...Shes insecure about something to have to keep putting you down. OR..if she REALLY, really does bother you, just tell her! Ask her why she feels the need to insult you at every chance. You may be suprised by her answer..try it..i wanna know what she says..

 

[shelleyd2008]

Sounds like my sister....

Don't let her get too you, or don't let her know that she is getting to you. Try to ignore her, eventually she will go away!