So, nothing particularly funny has happened at Bambrook Bantams of late so I thought I would take another trip down memory lane with the star of the tale being the X.
You know those times when people hurt themselves and you can not help laughing? Our eyes quickly assess that they are not seriously injured and then the realisation of the circumstances resulting in the injury kicks in and we can not stop laughing to the point that it is a good thing that they are not seriously injured because in our laughter induced, weakened state, we are going to be absolutely no assistance whatsoever?
No X hubby’s were seriously harmed in the telling of these tales
While he was never Footloose, Saturday Night Fever or Dirty Dancing material, X hubby fancied himself as a bit of a dancer.
We are at a wedding in a beautiful, carpeted ballroom with a polished timber dance floor. The band was playing but no one was dancing. X hubby announced that it was “time to get this party started” and was working on his moves on the way to floor, picking up speed in preparation for his grand entrance.
I have to give him credit here, he looked petty good in his black dinner suit, sashaying his way to the front of the room and when he dropped to his knees and slid across the dance floor, arms raised, he had everyone’s attention. Sadly for him this is when the dance floor came to an end and the carpet began again. All momentum and gracefulness was instantly halted and he face planted the carpet that fast he could have suffered whiplash.
No assistance could be rendered by anyone in the room and there was no dancing on his part for quite a few weeks while his knee caps recovered from the trauma of coming so close to being non existent.
Another time we are at a friend’s house. Hubby disappears for a while but returns with all the blood drained from his face, obviously in pain and barely able to walk but shrugging off all attempts to help him and with no intentions of telling us what happened.
In the car on the way home, with an audience of one [me] he confessed. Being a black belt in martial arts, at our encouragement, our friend was showing us some kicks and other moves. X hubby had gone to the bathroom and was secretly practicing some of the moves with the aid of the mirror. Due to his misjudging of available space, one of his overenthusiastic kick attempts had connected with the bathroom sink, breaking three toes!
Our trip home took 20 minutes longer than it should have due to the fact that we spent those 20 minutes parked on the side of the road after I nearly lost control of the car; he was not able to drive and I was laughing so hard I had no chance of safely operating a motor vehicle or seeing where we were driving.
No bathroom sinks were harmed in the telling of this tale
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