The Front Porch Swing

[ducksanddoxies]

I had workshops all day today and have them tomorrow too. Spent six hours learning about cancer and gross anatomy. Fascinating but not relevant to elementary PE or health. Tomorrow should be more my speed.

Funny y'all mention haircuts. The oldest and I got ours cut today. Joy boy's hair doesn't grow as quickly as the oldest so he got a reprieve. Oldest has long hair. It covers his ears and he doesn't want it shorter. I like it. I figure when he rebels it'll be shaved off.

Second night of vbs. I'm beat. Night y'all.

 

[Beekissed]

My mom used to walk into my house and grab the broom. When first married, i took it as a sign that she didn't think my house keeping was up to par. (it's not, but that's an other story!) Over time, i came to realize that that was her love language: Acts of service. If you want a good read, check out "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. It's a great read about understanding how folks perceive and express love.
Any how, I digress... After a while, i accepted it as her way of helping out. If she were alive today, i'd love to hand her my broom!

If I could design the perfect kitchen, it would be all stainless steel, with a huge drain in the middle of the floor, and a high pressure hose with optional soap. After a meal, i could have folks clear out, and just hose everything down, including the plates and silverware. Single step clean up! Oh, and i'd invite young children to stay for the clean up. They could get the hose as well, take care of the evening showers, and get their clothes clean at the same time. For that matter, the dog could stay if i had one!!

I used to think the same thing when my mother would visit and start cleaning on my house....always thought "I just can't please this woman!" but since then I've realized it is how she shows love....and how I show love too. When I would visit my friend's house in high school I loved her family so much that I would always volunteer to clean up the supper dishes and do any other chores her mom wanted done. Even helped her dad in the barn with the cows.

When they had a wedding or death in the family they would call me and I would be behind the scenes cleaning up, putting out food, doing laundry and remaking beds while everyone was at the event, etc. Later I realized they used me quite a bit, but I don't care...it was my way of showing love and love is never wasted....it may be wasted by those who take advantage, but it is never wasted by those who give it and it's measured carefully by the Lord, Who is always watching and proud of His child who gives love freely. He loves a cheerful giver!

I may gripe and complain about my family who takes and takes and rarely gives, but I really do love being a servant most of the time. It's how I best show my love, though sometimes I wish I got some love back now and again. Just sometimes it would be nice......

 

[LBejaran]

I used to think the same thing when my mother would visit and start cleaning on my house....always thought "I just can't please this woman!" but since then I've realized it is how she shows love....and how I show love too. When I would visit my friend's house in high school I loved her family so much that I would always volunteer to clean up the supper dishes and do any other chores her mom wanted done. Even helped her dad in the barn with the cows.

When they had a wedding or death in the family they would call me and I would be behind the scenes cleaning up, putting out food, doing laundry and remaking beds while everyone was at the event, etc. Later I realized they used me quite a bit, but I don't care...it was my way of showing love and love is never wasted....it may be wasted by those who take advantage, but it is never wasted by those who give it and it's measured carefully by the Lord, Who is always watching and proud of His child who gives love freely. He loves a cheerful giver!

I may gripe and complain about my family who takes and takes and rarely gives, but I really do love being a servant most of the time. It's how I best show my love, though sometimes I wish I got some love back now and again. Just sometimes it would be nice......

Even though it has been several years since Grandma died, I remember that everyone kept asking "How are you doing?" or "Are you okay?" and that always made me want to cry more. We'd taken care of Grandma for five years, keeping her happy and healthy when she was lucid and keeping her comfortable when the dementia was really acting up. That they finally had the gall to care made me want to scream, but instead I cried because it was more appropriate. I remember the calls to Mom's brothers and sisters, desperately needing a little help sometimes when Mom was working two jobs or if we had to go pick something up from the store, and they wouldn't answer the phone. We knew they cared, but they just weren't available when it wasn't convenient for them. I was only 17 at the time and I held a grudge against them for a long time because I saw them doing this as a betrayal. Mom was working 65 hours a week just to have another caretaker come help. It was hard and that we had to beg for help from family was a big disappointment.

When Grandma passed on, I went to the rosary but I didn't go to the funeral. I'd had enough of the tears in front of a lot of strangers and family that I rarely saw, so I stayed home and prepared for the comida we'd be having afterwards. It seemed fitting that we'd have a celebration the place where Grandma lived and passed. Setting up the tables and chairs, making sure all the decorations and roasting pans were set up in an orderly fashion, it was all very therapeutic. I worked, sweated, and finally went to rest. I slept through the entire thing.

Nowadays, I forgive my family for not being there and try to understand where they were at that point. The difference between lots of them and Mom is that they were unprepared to turn around and take care of their mother when she had always taken care of them. Mom, on the other hand, considered Grandma her best friend and probably would have taken care of her for another 5, 10, 20 years if she could have.

That being said, I'm now more aware of the flaws in my extended family. Materialism seems to be running rampant in lots of them, but that's okay. I just have to remember not to get on their bad sides. You should have seen how I was ignored for weeks by my Tio and Tia because I missed their daughter's wedding. It's not like I was filming at the Livestock Show as a mandatory part of my college courses that could have led me to fail the entire course if I'd missed it.

 

[Oldmomma]

I was raised you put dishes in the kitchen to be done later if you had guest. Guest was defined as someone who has came to your home less than 3 times. After 3 times your family, if your getting hungry or thirsty you know where its at and put your dishes in the sink or dishwasher when your done. Small kitchens made few people help while others kept eyes on little ones.
I was brought up with dishes, not plastic. You had two sets everyday and special occasion. And double the needed amount so you could always serve guests that stopped by. Add to that the middle east custom of always offer food and drink to guests and no thanks is not acceptable. I ran a daycare for few years and many parents showed up around meal times. I sat them down or sent a plate home with them and they loved knowing they could go home and relax and kids were fed. Here is hard cause by my age traditionally girls take over for mom so she can sit and chat. But my girls havent learned how to prepare many of the dishes and instead of letting them join in and help or watch and learn my girls end up sitting with me. Also nothing is labeled, nothing is recognizable and some things are dangerous if you tried to taste it to see what it is. Add that to nothing matches and you get silverware thats a hit or miss and glasses that are chipped. It drives me OCD. I remember one year I packed my kitchen on plans to move and the deal fell through so we only unpacked what was needed. Well I decided to plan a thanksgiving dinner and allow my daughter to invite guests. I went to take out my silver so it could be polished and could not find it. I was so upset we cancelled the dinner. When hubby sent a few boxes to Libya in the cars guess what I found! Now I got my silver but not my nice dishes lol. And most days we eat off plastic I brought from walmart dollar buys. Cant find many sets of dishes here, most are brittle crap from china and what you would find at Big Lots you know not perfects. And priced like Khols or JCPenneys! Traditionally I bought new every time I was down to just enough for family from dishes being broken by accident. So hubby got to buying dollar plates from walmart you know those spring dishes plastic set of four colors....yep then I began using those each season and each new season I tossed out beyond usable and the good ones went to garage for giving away to needy or that one day supply for camping trips that never came. I tried to find matching here but after 7 yrs all the stuff I bought last time I was here is finally being replaced with new designs and at 2.50 or more each piece its costly. Silverware is dollar store quality and rusts or bends horribly. Thankfully I brought two sets, everyday and special.
I had just started buying for my sons eventual home when he was killed so they are collecting dust on top of my cabinets. I hate plastic but it doesnt break or rust! Ok best stop talking...lol

 

[perchie.girl]

I dont have good dishes. None. I was given two sets of Corel when I moved out of the house... 35 years ago. They got lost in the move up to the house in the desert. I am sort of glad because sadly to say I relly didnt like them.

Grandma has the same set here of Corel. Shes probably had them 40-45 years. The things are indestructible.

So eventually I will get another set of Corel and possibly a few pieces of decorative serving plates ... I love cobalt blue and lately I see Walmart has Glassware plates that are cobalt... Sigh one day... But I will rarely ever have to do enough place settings for more than four people.

Except if I decide to have a Backyard Chicken meetup at my house. Been day dreaming about doing that one. Here we do Potluck And because its so far off the beaten path I will have to offer a campout. I certainly have plenty of spots for tents and parking of motor homes. Then there is the Spa/hotel in town if people want to stay there too ...

Who knows.... Sigh one day...

deb

 

[LBejaran]

Except if I decide to have a Backyard Chicken meetup at my house. Been day dreaming about doing that one. Here we do Potluck And because its so far off the beaten path I will have to offer a campout. I certainly have plenty of spots for tents and parking of motor homes. Then there is the Spa/hotel in town if people want to stay there too ...

Who knows.... Sigh one day...

deb

That would be so cool! I've always wanted to meet up with other people locally who love their chickens, but most of them aren't involved in BYC or they don't want to hang out with a bunch of other chicken people. I actually just got invited earlier this evening to join a Facebook group because I was talking about the new Muscovy I bought. It feels good to be part of a community that looks like it is entirely made up of women where they encourage trading/selling poultry/poultry-related products. That's fine with me!

My hope is to one day have a great group of friends that I can invite over for a potluck and late-night cocktails with a roaring fire in the pit that we can sit around and tell stories. It just seems like the kind of idealistic thing I'd want to enjoy.

 

[Oldmomma]

I had correlle too. I got a total of 9 pieces of china from my chosen set on my first marriage and couldnt even make 1 place setting. I had my blue corn flower correlle set for ages. Finally found another set I liked and gave away two sets of four settings to friends in need. We were a family of 7 so I always bought 12 settings. Here there are tons of four piece sets but few 12s and they never have more than 1 box of any design cause ladies here never want the same as so and so has.uggh. I bought a set of asian style bowls and they were two different designs but both pink colored. Kids broke 1 bowl and 1 spoon so far. Im the same with glasses OCD. Cracked, chipped, mismatched your in a box for charity. When I was here last was washing dishes at sil house and was cleaning a glass, didnt see the big chip out of it and sliced open the webbing between my fingers. Thankfully not deep. Bled for two days it kept opening up til I bound the two fingers together with gauze. Now I get neurotic washing others dishes.
Here also mostly salt water and it leaves a film on dishes, yep OCD again. Dishwashers are rare like dryers here. Only women who lived outside the country buy them. So hard to find. Now dont get me started on pots and pans here. Im using a cheap set thst cost me 35 bucks for 6 varied size pots with lids. I have had to really work on my OCD towards household items and normal supply of replacement here. Im going on two years with same dish towels and pot holders. And surely not ask about my linens! Ok daughter wants to go out so chat later.

 

[perchie.girl]

Quote:
San Diego has a great discussion group and does a get together about once a month starting around February ish. We meet at a chicken friendly park or fairground or someones home that have good parking access. So far the smallest meetup weve had has been about twenty people. We do a pot luck and some sort of silly contest... chicken hats, hardboiled egg contest, Some donate "stuff" for a raffle and raffle tickets are sold to help pay for the next meetup.

There are quite a few crafters, Soap makers, cheese makers, Jam makers.... Those that want to bring tables and set up to sell stuff. And then of course there are chickens.... OMG... I once saw a roo that I swear to God was at least two feet tall. and chicks and hatching eggs .... you name it. Couple of us inventors get our heads together as well.... One fellow is an electronics wizard and has made at least ten incubators... some of which are in the Philippines right now. He is a force of nature.

Last meetup I went to I bought some Goat cheese Feta and a Goat cheese spread sort of like cream cheese... and a teeny jar of lemon curd. I had never had lemon curd before... YUMMMY.

Several of the members also do their own Processing and when they do they offer to do a hands on training session. I believe its BYOB... Bring your own bird. One gal does incubating for a dollar an egg. she has one of those huge cabinet hatchers.

So meetups are an aweful lot of fun

Here is a picture of the very first duck I met at a meetup....


Yup thats a duck diaper with a little skirt on it.... Part of the diaper has a place to fasten a leash. She was a been there done that duck raised by a seven year old.... I believe she was a runner duck.

deb

 

[LindaB220]

I dont have good dishes. None. I was given two sets of Corel when I moved out of the house... 35 years ago. They got lost in the move up to the house in the desert. I am sort of glad because sadly to say I relly didnt like them.

Grandma has the same set here of Corel. Shes probably had them 40-45 years. The things are indestructible.

So eventually I will get another set of Corel and possibly a few pieces of decorative serving plates ... I love cobalt blue and lately I see Walmart has Glassware plates that are cobalt... Sigh one day... But I will rarely ever have to do enough place settings for more than four people.

Except if I decide to have a Backyard Chicken meetup at my house. Been day dreaming about doing that one. Here we do Potluck And because its so far off the beaten path I will have to offer a campout. I certainly have plenty of spots for tents and parking of motor homes. Then there is the Spa/hotel in town if people want to stay there too ...

Who knows.... Sigh one day...

deb

You know it's funny. I had a beautiful set of dinnerware that Mama had given me. About 30 years old. Moved with me whenever I moved. I counted on my fingers the times I had used it. Aimee said why not get some use out of the wonderful set. So now we use them daily. (When we don't use plastic) Not a waste anymore. We love them.
My Mama was such a weird bird that we never entertained, had sleepovers, etc. I remember one day I had some of Johnny's family coming over and my house was a wreck. I called Mama to come help me. I was early 20's. She came and spent 4 hrs waxing my baseboards.

I said can't you do something that will show? and she said "All they have to do is look". She never taught me to clean, cook or garden. It was done when I got home from school. My ex Johnny said that that was why I had such trouble with cleaning. I never learned the joy of it. It took a long time but I get such a kick out of totally getting my kitchen to absolutely shine.

 

[TexasLisa]

Though, I must say, I've visited homes where it was clear there wasn't a clean dish in the house and the dishes were piled high and I was just itching to start washing dishes and cleaning the kitchen...especially if it looked like the dishes were not freshly dirtied and that maybe this person was a tad overwhelmed in their lives and could maybe use some help. But....still...that's crossing some boundaries unless you are really, really, really good friends and know they would welcome the interference.

O dear, that sounds like Ken! When I go home for a week, dishes aren't washed. He will call me and tell me he is down to 1 spoon. MEN!!! He tells me his hands get arthritic when he gets close to dish water. MEN!!!

If I could design the perfect kitchen, it would be all stainless steel, with a huge drain in the middle of the floor, and a high pressure hose with optional soap. After a meal, i could have folks clear out, and just hose everything down, including the plates and silverware. Single step clean up! Oh, and i'd invite young children to stay for the clean up. They could get the hose as well, take care of the evening showers, and get their clothes clean at the same time. For that matter, the dog could stay if i had one!!

That kitchen reminds me of the haunted hospital in Louisville, KY. They had operating rooms where everything was stainless steel and the drain was in the middle of the floor. Creepy. I love haunted houses. I had made plans to go home a few years ago and found out that my dad had gotten tickets for all of us kids to go to this haunted hospital. That just cracked me up.

Lisa