Walmart and Retired People

Discussion in 'Games, Jokes, and Fun!' started by FrenchHen, Mar 27, 2009.

  1. FrenchHen

    FrenchHen Chicken Ambassador

    Jan 26, 2009
    Bagshot Row
    My mom just emailed me this. Enjoy!

    TRIP TO WAL-MART.... Can you picture this?

    Yesterday I was at my local Wal-Mart buying a bag of Purina dog chow for my
    loyal pet, Tasha, the Wonder Dog, and was in the checkout line when woman
    behind me asked if I had a dog.

    What did she think I had - an elephant?

    So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I
    didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I
    probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that
    I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes
    coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

    I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it
    works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one
    or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it
    works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
    practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

    Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food
    poisoned me.

    I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish setter's rear end and
    a car hit us both.

    I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
    laughing so hard.

    Wal-Mart won't let me shop there anymore.

    Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the
    world to think of crazy things to say.
  2. Carolyn

    Carolyn Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 6, 2008
    HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!
    That is just toooooo funny!
    Thanks for sharing.
  3. PQ4evr

    PQ4evr Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jan 20, 2009
    Bellville Ohio

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