Can I have a nervous breakdown? Please? I really, really, really need one. I can't function as the glue that hold my family together any longer.
This is my day since 4:10 pm when DD got home from school:
4:10 grab soccer gear, have the kids change, grab trumpet, stand and book, plus USPS package to mail.
4:40 Drop DD at soccer (10 min late) Drive to UPS
4:45-5 Have UPS package up the trumpet, book and stand and mail them to my nephew
5:01 - 5:45 drive to USPS - too late. try again tomorrow, drive back to soccer. Ask DS if he has any homework, his reply: "No". DOuble check his pack, don't find any. Do tax class homework.
5:45 - 7:20 DD's soccer ends early due to injury (coach's DD); DS starts early. Ask DD if she has HW; answer "just reading" but I find a stck of papers she has neglected to do and I sit her on the bench at the soccer fields to work on it while I sit next to her and work on tax class stuff. I get mine done just as DS finishes soccer
7:40-8:45 pm - scrounge freezer for something quick to make for dinner, check BYC, eat dinner, check od DD HW situation, become suspicious of DS's, check online grades A A D A A A. D????? Science. Check teachers website. DS has turned in 0 of 4 lab write-ups, got 5/10 on a quiz, and an A+ on a group project. Teacher thankfully has most of her class stuff posted on her sharepoint, so DS and I start re-creating school science projects - it's going to be a loooong night.
8:50 - find DH tell him he must make sure DD does her math, science, reads 30 min and practices her harp for 45 as I will be busy all evening with DD
9:05 - DH comes into my office and tells me he is having a heart attack. (This happens several times a year, always at the most inconvenient times. Every time it is a panic attack.) Pupils are the same size, he can raise his arms up and down without pain, can still curl his tongue - likely not heart attack nor stroke... he tells me he will rest. Instead he takes BP meds, anxiety meds, asprin, & nitro pill.
9:07 - DH "Drive me to the ER!" (one time we had called an ambulance. Instead of going to the nearby tribal hospital, they took him to Bellevue and insurance did not cover the bill. I can get to the tribal hospital much quicker).
9:15 - check DH in. Tell them it is likely another panic attack, that this happens frequently. I'm visibly irritated with DH. Receptionist looks at me as callous wife. I tell her this happens several times a year. Told her check christmas eve 2008, heave snowstorm, no plows, 18" snow on the road, and we spent hours there with my 2 kids when they should have been asleep, risking all our safety in those horrible conditions for his panic attack. Nurse overhears "Oh ya, I remember you now, I was there - give me a number to reach you, we called the Dr. he will want a full work-up anyways. I'll call when he's ready to be picked up. I'll call if it is anything more serious." DH agrees it is likely another panic attack. Says he was contacted by Microsoft Legal about a huge lawsuit they are appealing on a product he worked on 20 years ago. He is the only one left at MSFT from the team, and is very nervous about giving a deposition.
9:25 - just sat in my car to leave in ER parking lot when this little junker of a car with the boom-box blaring hip-hop screeches into the parking lot and grabs the spot in front of mine (raised sidewalk between us). The car bounces back off the curb he just hit. I'm curious to see what the emergency might be so I don't start my car. I see it is the doctor! I'm pretty sure he just raced over from the casino next door. He steps out and looks at me, I'm pretty sure he recognizes me, but I flick on my brights to blind him and get out of there. I'm sure he knows who the patient is when he sees me. Don has been there too often.
just got a call - gotta run and get him. Panic attack as I thought.
