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This is just my personal opinion...but I think what you did was right (whether your DS liked it or not), but that his dad knew very well what he was doing/saying and he meant to hurt your DS feelings. It was not accidental, it was intentional. He is trying to make your DS pick sides, which is not fair for the kid. You say your inlaws are great...can you "quietly drop a comment" to them that they might want to talk with their son and how he is treating their grandson? But your DS dad is being immature and spiteful.
Some 17 years ago, my DH had his son (after much court drama) come for a visit to our house over here. WOW, the drama when we picked the boy up. The mom was crying and huggng and telling DH's son good bye as they would never see each other again as we were going to steal him away and blah, blah, blah. Well, we tried for years and years to have a relationship with DH's son (yes he paid his child support regardless). She promised the boy things all he time as long as he would like her best. We finally gave up. He never got the things she promised. We even went to the school and requested they enforce the Becca bill to force him to go to school. Here he was...in grade school and she would let him stay up until midnight, 2 or 3...and then not go to school the next morning because he was tired. Ya think? Well, now said boy is around 22...no job, quit school, Hair down his back. He says he can't get a job because of his hair....CUT IT OFF...She just emailed my DH and asked if she could have $1300.00 so she and son could get an apartment. I told DH he had better not even send her $13. (we do not have an extra $1300 siting around anyways). She is used to handouts.
I agree. You gave your ex the benefit of the doubt, and did what you thought was right. That's all any parent can do. Your ex is angry, and he's lashing out. He can't hurt you directly, so he's taking it out on the kid. What a loser! I really feel for your son. It's not fair to make him choose sides.
We pay for our sins. We marry the wrong guy when we're young and foolish, and our kids pay for it, too.
Thanks guys! I know he is taking his anger for me out on our son and he is mad that our son didn't "choose" him. It is awful that some parents have their head so far up their rear ends that they can't see the damage they are doing nor do they seem to care. My son says he is done wasting his emotions and enrgy on his dad. He says he will not talk to him again and will ignore any contact from him. My inlaws are great to a point. They love my son very much, but they have a hands off policy on other peoples relationships. I am not even sure they know what has really happened. They know his dads version of the truth which is scewed. So it should be interesting if they see things a little differently after talking to him and taking him to dinner. The worst part is that I am soooo angry and have no place to direct it. So I will just have to deal with it I guess, like an adult.
