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Yeah...but I have been bugging mine to FINISH my large coop since 2009...I gave up on that and got something that I thought could be easily converted into a second coop...that was also about 2 years ago...and then I found several options for builders to build me what I need that he won't and he's just now starting to get the second coop done and keeps threatening to stop all construction because he wants me to sell 1/2 my flock and downsize.
He refuses to finish my bantam bins which will house my bantams during the winter. This means I have to sell most of them (to him). To me, it means I have to hire someone else to do the cages. I pay for all of the chickens, chicks, eggs, vaccines, medications, sand, shavings, feed, etc, etc myself through hatching egg sales. Not a dime comes out of our "regular" budget...
He's only b*tching about it because he'll have to actually help out around here with feeding/watering while I'm recovering from the c-section....now that he knows how many birds I have
and he doesn't listen to me as far as the quickest/most time-efficient ways to feed/water--he's griping because it takes him 1/2 hour and it's "disorganized."
In actuality, it is not....but in his OCD brain, it is. He wants everything absolutely perfect and uniform and weird. They are living things!
He has already made me get rid of four of my horses. I told him it's him or the remaining horses--so he backed off. The hatching egg sales pay for my 3 horses' hay (and HIS one horse's hay) every year. I used to raise/breed reptiles before I got into the poultry...he made me stop that because he said the lizards were gross, their heat lamps were a fire hazard and the crickets I had to feed them were "smelly & noisy." Now that I have chickens--it's all he gripes about. He brings it up several times a day/night. Tonight, he said it was really bothering him and that my chicken hobby is "weird & gross."
Girl, I so understand what you are going through. I could go on and on about stuff but just a few tidbits about what I have concluded. Everyone has interestes, hobbies, things they like to do, things that bring them joy. I have wanted a farm since I was a little horse crazy girl. I inherited that passion from my Grandma, my dads mom and my dad relived that through me. We raised cows, horses, pigs, chickens, veggies and hay together. My dad nurtured that passion and that love followed me to adulthood and has been ingrained in who I am. When I met DH I told him all about me, what I wanted for my life, my dreams etc. He is a city boy but he loved me. Tried for a cowboy but he broke my heart. So city boy made it sound like he had the same dreams. NOT!! So 25 years later and two boys 19 and 22 he's got an ultimatum. I have put up with so much BS, so much of his illness, so many lies, so much complaining about the farm and someone who has done a complete turnaround from the person I married. I have turned to my farm as the only joy in my life. Even my kids have put me out of their life (they are teen and young adult so whatever). What none of them realize is if the animals go, so do I, because they are the reason I stay. They are what I turn to to survive, to bring me joy. I know that sounds sad but I feel obligated to stay for other reasons. You are young and expecting a new baby. Put your foot down and explain to him that he is not the only thing that defines you. Your hobbies, dreams and interests define you. It's part of the person you are. The person he married. He may not like parts but you take it all when you get married. When you marry you agree to accept the whole person. The good, the bad, the ugly. For better or for worse. I'm sure there are things about him you don't particularly enjoy but you agree to live with because you love him. It's all a give and take and acceptance. I know sometimes people can be excessive but what you are doing doesn't sound to me to be excessive. Just not a joy he shares. I have even gone from 8 horses down to 2 to make mine happy and he still complains. I either have 2 or none. If they are none, I am gone. I give and he takes. There is nothing to fill me back up but the farm. Lay it on the line girl! Do it before you raise your kids together so they don't have to suffer through the disagreements. Come to an understanding of each other.
Whew, sorry for the heavy stuff but that just struck a cord that was a long time in strumming! Hope this helps some.
I like extra sauce on my pizza.
