What did you all do about your dissaproving DH?

[babylady4]

Mine was raised with chickens, but he had a stroke when he saw the incubator!!!!

He loved the entire process of hatching the eggs AFTER I explained they were all going away as soon as possible after they hatched (we live in town). We go and visit the chickens on the farm they live on, and he loves them all since they were handled so much by the kids they are very tame.

I am sorry, but I would have walked over to the pen, picked up a chick and bought it. I would tell him that it was to compensate for all the time he wastes with the games.

Has he ever just sat and watched chickens? They are so funny, well worth every penny just in entertainment value!

 

[saddina]

Uh... I said "I'm doing (blank), it's comming out of my funds". My husband has the good sense to stand back and let me do what I want. If he's still angry, well there's ways to get a husband back into a cheerful mood.

 

[greenthumbmama]

I'm sorry to hear of your frustration.

My husband was not super happy about chickens either. In fact, he really rejected it for a long time. He grew up with a very abusive step father that would beat him and his brother if they didn't do chores on their homestead. So the thought of a farm of any kind brings bad memories for my sweet husband. And I understand that. However, with that said, it's been my dream to live as sustainably as possible. When the economy took a dive recently, my husband began to rethink his position. We have a garden that's 2700 SF, a small orchard, and now chickens and it gives my husband great comfort knowing our family can be fed regardless of our economic situation. The chickens are still MY thing, but he's not so objectionable to them anymore.

I agree with some of the comments that perhaps you can explore with him why he objects to them so much. Good communication is always important in these situations.

Good luck!

 

[Chicks_N_Horses]

Don't throw him out just yet over him not being fond of alot chickens if he is a good DH

I tend to overrun my DH with animals. He says we have wayy too many and he is the one having to fork out all the money for my big ol fat feed bill. My Dh just likes a few animals, not the huge amount that we currently have. I find that wearing his favorite nightie will get him to agree to let me keep 'it' and then when he regrets saying that later...well, too late - done deal

Works everytime with mine.....

Something you two will just have to work out and discuss like partners. How would you feel if he was doing something you didn't want to? It can go both ways but you just have to find a common ground.

 

[hikerchick]

What amazes me is the number of women who are treated like children and tolerate it. I would rather die alone than have someone tell me what I can and cannot do. If a man doesn't see you as an adult capable of making your own decisions, and you have to ask permission to do the things that you want to do, then I don't see any point in even having him in your life. He would get shown the door; but it would have happened long before I married a controlling, parental man.

 

[saddina]

Quote:
I see we have similar methods.

 

[chicks4kids]

Hikerchick,

You have a point, but sometimes especially when there is a child/children involved, we as women tend to accept alot more things thinking that it is best for the child. Then comes the whole point of security, and the "what would I do?" rationalization, which really isn't, but we still do it.

I am not siding with her husband, however, he may be going through some things as well. Maybe having financial problems, work problems, who knows...

sangel4you hopefully will talk to him--however he may be too difficult to talk to...maybe not. Everyone has off days, and maybe yesterday was his...

Communication is a huge factor...yesterday may have not been the day, nor today perhaps, but maybe tomorrow...

to sangel4you. Hang in there...it'll work out, it always does!!

 

[Mahonri]

DW still not happy about the chickens but sat out with us tonight while the 10 week olds were free ranging and watched till they went back into their pen to roost.

 

[cthrash1]

Quote:
Hubby and I went through a 20 yr lull about the time I had chickens... We went through a lot of trials during this period and I sacrificed ALOT of my own enjoyment to make our marriage work, which included liquidating my flock completely. The chickens belonged to me, my DD, and my DS...They were pets and our entertainment...He never understood that and never tried to enjoy them, they were just chickens to him. After rehoming my flock we were talking one night and he admitted to being slightly jealous of the time I spent back at the coop and he felt like he was losing me... Well, DUH. you don't pay attn to your wife she's gonna think you don't want her anymore?
Well, things are 100% better between us now, we talk all the time and do things together again...He has his watch collecting hobby, Nascar, and wrestling shows... And I get to have 6 girlies(no roos was the agreement) for eggs/pets. Ya know, he always thought you had to have a roo for the hens to lay... Silly man!!

 

[Mrs. Glassman]

I don't care for, or see the point in, some of the things my DH likes to spend his time and money on.

BUT, as long as we have money to pay the bills, I let him have his pleasures, and I dang well expect to have mine.

And that is the way it should be.

I have walked out on two husbands who didn't see things that way. They thought they could do their thing as they pleased, yet had some right to dictated what I'd do.

My answer was: "No way buddy! I have this thing called a J-O-B, and I make M-O-N-E-Y. I can support myself. I had a Daddy when I was a child...I certainly am not in the market for one now that I'm grown."

Good luck. I hope things turn out your way.