When do you know? Question about babys!

[annie3001]

Hello.

thought i would bring my question here, looking for some insight. Hubby and I turned 37 this year, and already have 2 beautiful boy/girl toddlers. I am happy in our life, and feel our family complete, the unknown of another child is out there. Neither one of us are fixed (so to speak) (lost for words on that one). So the possibly (if we are not carefully) we could get pregnant again.

I am happy not being pregant but the thought is pounding my head and heart lately. So much so i took some baby stuff (from our kids, stuff like 2 cribs and exersaucer and some other stuff) and donated them today to one of those donate bins.

The kids barely fit in the car, but did fine. the car was packed. sooo anyways, I am really sad that i did that. Like i was throwing away memories. i dunno.

But the basement is nice and clean.
Hubby and I have talked the talk many times. and yet he says we are done having kids too. (both did agree at that time). but he hasnt gotten fixed either.
i dont want to be an old fart being pregnant.

If it was going to happen, i was thinking more like last year. too late for that one.

Maybe I just need to borrow a baby from someone.

As a small note: I nursed our daughter for 2 1/2 years, and shes 3 now, and still wants momma. She doesnt get nursed but is super attached to me. perhaps that has something to do with my mixed feelings. any piece of wise advice I will be so ever thankful. just tell me what to do!

ha ha


andrea-

 

[I have WHAT in my yard?]

Aw!

I remember going through that!!! It's a really normal hormonal reset. Honest! You're six months post nursing (give or take, yes?) Your body is asking you if you're done. Its pumping out hormones to reset itself in no-pregnant non-nursing mode. (To a large extent as long as you're nursing, you're pregnant.)

I missed my infants when it came time to be done and I suddenly realized I had toddlers and there would never be a sweet little baby head on my chest again.

I could get milk for over a year after I stopped nursing! But, donating the stuff sounds like you're done. Done enough that you made what would be a significant financial strain to replace decision......

I feel for ya!

 

[mrslb333]

We recently got rid of our baby stuff it's so sad to see it go

I'd love 1 more I always wanted 6 we can afford to do it but unfortunately I've been advised not to have any more as I nearly bled to death last time plus we have had 4 premature babies 34, 33, 30 & 28 weeks so there would be a serious risk of having one earlier and I don't think either of us could watch another baby go through that again.
My eldest is nearly 12 and my youngest 18 months. I'd love to be one of those people that never wanted to do it again but sadly I'm not.
I now have a puppy that my husband says is number 6 and we are enjoying watching the kids grow up even if it is too quick.
I was the same feeding my little one she still has a feed at bedtime and in the morning. I think it's because we spend so long caring for our babies and when they can fend for themselves a little more we feel redundant and need a purpose again. Maybe making plans for yourself again like work new hobbies etc could take the edge off it

 

[hollymh]

Well hubby and I will eventually have the same issue, we are done with that said we aren't "fixed" b/c life changes! After my first I got rid of everything without any problems, no attachment to anything but after 2 years I wanted another and now that I KNOW I'm DONE, I can't let go of my sons baby things... I think it's just the idea of letting go and knowing that it's the end of baby-having , I too nurse my son and will practice child-led weaning but in the mean time he is super mommy dependent and I LOVE it. Only you can know if it is time to stop, I would love another one but I will never have another, I have two amazing beautiful kids and I thank God for them, I'm going to enjoy them, raise them and enjoy my life. I am only having two b/c I can afford two college 529 savings plans, I can afford vacations and travel for a family of four. It may come across selfish but I want to enjoy my life with my kids and if I keep having them it's going to be difficult to do that. I'm rambling now, but that just my two cents... No one but you can say if it's right or wrong, just don't make a decision you will regret.

 

[annie3001]

thanks everyone, your comments are really sweet i do think "i know" but its still such a hard decision. one that heck you dont want to regret. I havent told hubby about the donated items, he knows ive been wanting to donate them. thanks again.

 

[sourland]

Do not get rid of all the baby stuff! That is the quickest way to assure a pregnancy in addition to you know---- The Princess did not get rid of our kids' baby stuff until after menopause.

 

[turney31]

Of course you know, that since you donated everything......You will get pregnant!

Dern you posted while I was hunting and pecking!

 

[gritsar]

Quote:

But the princess is one smart woman.

(Except for her momentary lack of reason when she married you of course

)

 

[redhen]

Quote:
LOL.. yup.. you're sure to get pregnant now..

 

[georgialee]

I JUST went through this. I'm 28 and have 3 and 5 yr old boys. I was always on the fence about having another. When I really thought about it I realized that if I were to become pregnant now, my boys would be 4 and 6... and then when the baby is old enough to really play they would be 7 and 9 -- and at that age they won't want to play with a 3 yr old. So then I felt like I would need to have another one a year or two after the first so that the baby would have a playmate. And that's when it hit me. I CANNOT deal with 4 kids. So i'm just gonna stick with my 2 and be happy.

On a side note, have you thought about fostering?