Will a Gander Forget/Forgive Me?

[The Dim Side]

My one gander (8.5 months old) I've known since he hatched, and he loves me. He gets excited when he sees me, follows me around, and likes to be held, snuggling his head on my shoulder. (Just to note, he does have a flock, he was raised by both parents, and there's another goose, too. But they always let me hang out with them.)

But this morning, my BF (who the gander really doesn't like) was walking away from them, and the gander bit him in the butt and wing slapped him. BF turned around and reflexively kicked him away, which scared him. When I tried going up to him to check on him, he kept running away from me. I've never had him do that before, and it seems he associated the kick with me, too. So over the last hour, he's been distant but slowly getting a little less scared. He looks like he wants to attack when I go to pick him up, but he's okay when I hold him, and he'll rest his head on my shoulder again. But he's still definitely hesitant with that and still afraid when I'm walking around him, seeing me a little bit as a threat.

Does anyone know if he'll hold a grudge forever, or if he might forgive and forget? (Especially since *I* didn't actually do anything!) And how long might it take for him to get over it if he does?

 

[Tonyroo]

They associate the abuse to human beings so they remember. I'd say don't have your bf around your geese. To them he's a stranger.

 

[Goosebaby]

He will forgive you. Geese have long memories and it can take them awhile but they’re smart and understand who is their friend or not, and who is trying to be their friend.

If it helps I upset two of my gander’s pretty bad when they were about that age.

We were going into winter but it had been warm until we went through a sudden cold snap. My little idiots hadn’t quite figured out preening but decided to take a bath in freezing weather and got completly soaked through so o figured I’d just dry them off with a towel. The towel terrified them, they thought I was attacking them, and they were really pissed off with me for a few days. They did get over it and went back to being snugglebugs again.

Just give your baby time and attention, he’ll be okay.

 

[JRies]

Just pecking order he will get over it. Probably not a bad thing if he wasn't hurt. Just a few ground rules he learned.

 

[Jenbirdee]

Just give it time... and keep the bf away

 

[The Dim Side]

They associate the abuse to human beings so they remember. I'd say don't have your bf around your geese. To them he's a stranger.

Is there a way to get them to not see him as a stranger? He does most of the farm work and has also known them as long as I have. He just hadn't spent as much time with them as I have because I worked remotely for a couple years, so it's been back and forth how much the geese tolerate him or not, lol.

He will forgive you. Geese have long memories and it can take them awhile but they’re smart and understand who is their friend or not, and who is trying to be their friend.

If it helps I upset two of my gander’s pretty bad when they were about that age.

We were going into winter but it had been warm until we went through a sudden cold snap. My little idiots hadn’t quite figured out preening but decided to take a bath in freezing weather and got completly soaked through so o figured I’d just dry them off with a towel. The towel terrified them, they thought I was attacking them, and they were really pissed off with me for a few days. They did get over it and went back to being snugglebugs again.

Just give your baby time and attention, he’ll be okay.

I'm glad to hear that yours have! It seems like he's friends with me again, too, so that's a relief. It was just so jarring to me for him to run away so much when I tried to pick him up, haha. I was really worried he'd be afraid of me forever! I went up to him a number of times today to cuddle with him.

 

[Goosebaby]

Is there a way to get them to not see him as a stranger? He does most of the farm work and has also known them as long as I have. He just hadn't spent as much time with them as I have because I worked remotely for a couple years, so it's been back and forth how much the geese tolerate him or not, lol.

I'm glad to hear that yours have! It seems like he's friends with me again, too, so that's a relief. It was just so jarring to me for him to run away so much when I tried to pick him up, haha. I was really worried he'd be afraid of me forever! I went up to him a number of times today to cuddle with him.

As he gets older he might not like being held as much, he’ll still love your company, but big grown up birds don’t always like snuggles as much! Just letting you know so it doesn’t come as a shock.

his behavior towards your bf is normal. Geese view others in three different ways:
Members of their immediate flock/ family.
People/other animals/ other geese they know but don’t consider as “theirs.”
Strangers.

Stranger danger is a real thing for geese, fear of anyone or anything new is a survival instinct.

People, animals, and other geese that they do know but who they don’t interact with as often as who they decide is “theirs,” their immediate flock family, get shoved into the criteria of “background character, nuisance, possible rival.” This can cause a lot of drama once winter breeding season hormones set in. He’ll probably get more aggressive towards your bf.

Your bf can start spending more time with him so they can bond. Treats will help, but consistent interaction is what’s important. Setting boundaries is also important, if your gander gets aggressive towards him he needs to say “NO” and then pick him up and hold him for a minute. Offering him a treat afterwards teaches your gander that though he was scolded and taught his place, that your bf is still his friend.

 

[The Dim Side]

As he gets older he might not like being held as much, he’ll still love your company, but big grown up birds don’t always like snuggles as much! Just letting you know so it doesn’t come as a shock.

Yeah, I'll be sad if it does happen. He used to sleep on my lap all the time but definitely grew out of that after the first few months, haha. But his dad still likes to be held, so maybe he'll be the same, too! (Edit to add: When he has the chance to crawl on my lap, he just tries to mate with me now. XD) This is him (he's a big boy!):

Your bf can start spending more time with him so they can bond. Treats will help, but consistent interaction is what’s important. Setting boundaries is also important, if your gander gets aggressive towards him he needs to say “NO” and then pick him up and hold him for a minute. Offering him a treat afterwards teaches your gander that though he was scolded and taught his place, that your bf is still his friend.

I've been telling BF pretty much the same thing, try spending more time with them consistently, even if it's just a bit a day. He complains about not having enough time, but he just isn't dedicating it when he could, lol. And then he gets upset when they're mean to him and says he doesn't know what to do. He spent some time last night with them while I supervised though. The girls (especially the mom) just eggs the boys on so much though, so they get mad. That's a big factor, so I have to calm them down first because she's such a trouble maker, haha.

 

[Goosebaby]

Yeah, I'll be sad if it does happen. He used to sleep on my lap all the time but definitely grew out of that after the first few months, haha. But his dad still likes to be held, so maybe he'll be the same, too! (Edit to add: When he has the chance to crawl on my lap, he just tries to mate with me now. XD) This is him (he's a big boy!):

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I've been telling BF pretty much the same thing, try spending more time with them consistently, even if it's just a bit a day. He complains about not having enough time, but he just isn't dedicating it when he could, lol. And then he gets upset when they're mean to him and says he doesn't know what to do. He spent some time last night with them while I supervised though. The girls (especially the mom) just eggs the boys on so much though, so they get mad. That's a big factor, so I have to calm them down first because she's such a trouble maker, haha.

Yeah I have the same problems with my girls too! They just loooove starting drama!