Funniest Things A City Slicker Has Ever Said To You?

[sparkles2307]

"So, how do you keep the roosters apart from the hens if you free-range?"

me: "I don't." --(insert almost amused grin here)

"Um, what about the eggs? Dont you have to keep the roosters away for the hens to lay eggs?"

me: "Nope"

"So........ OMIGOD you sell eggs with SPERM in them!?!?" (insert slight gagging sounds here)

me: "You can't taste it."

Breakfast at the office was over after that.

 

[Cowgirl71]

I get so mad when I hear about deer hunters shooting cattle, donkeys, horses, dogs, etc.

A person who can not dicern between a deer and another species should NOT have a gun.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for deer hunting! But I get so mad when I hear about some wacko shooting an animal without studying long enough to discern wether it is actually a deer or not! Let alone to asess wether it's an older buck, younger buck, doe, or a fawn!

I am very much into registered Black Angus genetics. One of the most famous bulls alive today is "S S Objective T510 0T26." He's got an awesome DNA profile. It got me to wondering why his sire, "SS Traveler 6807 T510," never became more popular. So I researched it. I found out that he was becoming REALLY famous, a top seller for semen. But in May 2003 he was shot by a deer hunter.

He was worth a LOT of money. I'm not able to find a number on the internet, but I'd guess he was worth $500,000 - $1,000,000.

And he was shot by a deer hunter.

http://www.udarrell.com/sunnyslope_angus_t510_semex_bull_pen_report.html

 

[mom'sfolly]

Yep, I lived in the foothills of the Catskills, and we never went hiking during deer season. To many trigger happy idiots from the city, shooting at everything that moves.

Here's a great song...

 

[Q9]

How does ANYONE confuse a cow with a DEER?!

On a side note, I had to explain to my MOM of all people how chicken eggs got fertilized... What fun.

Then good 'ol Dad brings up this question: "Which brings up this question about roosters... Where is it?"

I laughed and then realized that I didn't know, either.

 

[matthewschickens]

This doesn't have much to do with the subject but I wanted to post it...

 

[debilorrah]

My grandson, who is 4, clearly let me know this weekend that the eggs in the coop are to go back to the hens so they can more baby chickens. He was aghast when I told him they are for breakfast. He informed me that I need to go to the store to get eating eggs.

 

[Cowgirl71]

Quote:

Having a raised a few hogs, I thought it was really cute! I love his drawl!

 

[SpringChickens]

Quote:

Don't feel bad, they don't have anything that you could actually see. They just press their cloacae together and presto chango, you've got fertilized eggs.

 

[Tala]

Quote:

Don't feel bad, they don't have anything that you could actually see. They just press their cloacae together and presto chango, you've got fertilized eggs.

I guess I can understand his question, I mean on most domesticated animals you don't need a magnifiying glass to see it (cows, horses, dogs, etc.)
I think I read here on BYC that roosters don't actually have "anything" though, they just do the "cloacal kiss" but ducks are another story.

 

[huntinfamily]

I have spent the last two hours reading through all the funny things everyone has heard and decided to add my own. Be warned, although I think this is hilarious some people (my Wife included) thought it was really mean.
My Wife had a few friends for work over one day for a BBQ. She usually milks our goats around 6 so everyone was there during milking time and wanted to watch. One of the girls had brought her boyfriend who was very obnoxious. He was one of those people that tried to convince you that he knew everything. We have two female milk goats and one mean male goat. So while my wife is milking one of the goats her friends boyfriend is carrying on about how smart he is about this and that. Getting to the point that I wanted to hit him I jumped in and asked if he wanted to milk one of the goats. At first he didn't want to because they smell but after goading him for a minute and questioning his manliness he decided to. I told he that the male (we call him Old Man) had to be milked. He said "I thought only the females had milk?" "Nope" I said males have milk too. I proceeded to tell him just to walk up to him, grab his udder (you can all imagine what I pointed to) and give it a yank or two. H walked into the goat pen reached up under Old Man and gave he boy parts a yank. I let the old goat chase him around the yard for about 5 minutes before calling my Aussie out to herd him into the barn. He didn't talk to me the rest of the night. Not that I minded but it was really hard to not fall out of my chair laughing. My Wife was mad at me for the next couple of days but I still think it was worth it to see that goat ramming him and biting at the back of his pants.