Funniest Things A City Slicker Has Ever Said To You?

[True Grit]

Quote:
Yup, yup, I have been asked more than once if my similarly sized grey mini schnauzer and white and brown jrt are the same breed.

 

[PineappleMama]

Quote:

and did I mention

He TOTALLY set himself up for that one. Never, EVER, claim you know it all there will ALWAYS be something to prove you wrong... and, as this one learned, there's always going to be someone willing to "educate" you. If you're nice, they'll be nice. But if you're obnoxious then they'll want to make the lesson REALLY stick... unfortunately it often takes several goes before they realize that the REAL lesson is that they don't know everything... but eventually, with enough incidents they'll learn to keep their trap shut unless they've actually already done this particular thing.

WTG... edjumacation... one moron at a time.

Told DH about the "Meat from the store = no animals harmed" bit and he just got this totally befuddled look. I'm very much enjoying passing these stories on to him so please keep them coming.

 

[Godsgrl]

I was out in the zoo one time with an owl on my hand. A woman came up and asked if the parrot talked.

 

[cassie]

Quote:
Umm. It is really not all that rare for male goats to give milk. I have had some I had to milk out every few days or so, and I once saw a Toggenburg buck on the show circuit whose udder was much larger than his scrotum. He had to be milked out before he went in the show ring. Were these bucks abnormal in any way? No. These bucks usually come from very high milk producing lines. The only problems are that the heat from the udder may depress fertility a bit, and if the herdsman does not make sure the buck is milked out when necessary the buck can develop a serious and sometimes fatal case of mastitis.

 

[cassie]

I also should have mentioned that I thought what you did to the know-it-all was hilarious and I would have done the same thing under the circumstances.

 

[Q9]

Quote:

Don't feel bad, they don't have anything that you could actually see. They just press their cloacae together and presto chango, you've got fertilized eggs.

I guess I can understand his question, I mean on most domesticated animals you don't need a magnifiying glass to see it (cows, horses, dogs, etc.)
I think I read here on BYC that roosters don't actually have "anything" though, they just do the "cloacal kiss" but ducks are another story.

Thank you. I think.

Another disturbing mystery solved!

 

[Noncentzter]

My MIL is 78 and sometime in her past she picked up a chicken and out plopped an egg. It was soft and then hardened...therefore all this time she has told everyone that chickens lay soft eggs. Doesn't matter that I watched one of my chickens lay an egg and it was not soft, it was hard when laid...she knows the truth, or rather her version of it! LOL

 

[Sueg4332]

I've got a good one. I have Easter egg Layers green . blue and pink eggs. My city slicker brother came to live with me. He asked me why I colored dyed the eggs without boiuling them frist? When I told him they were laid that way he didn't believe me. I took him to the hen right after she laid a egg he still thought I was pulling his leg. Took me for ever to conviece him they came that way.

 

[PineappleMama]

^That comes from pulling too many pranks.

I've told my mom and sister that blue and green layers exist, but I don't think they really believe me... especially my sister. Definitely too many pranks... like Mom and her "voice activated" microwave....

she stood there saying... then yelling 'COOK FIVE MINUTES" for a while before it finally dawned on her that mom had pulled a fast one... any wonder she doesn't believe me when I say that my brown egg laying hens cousins lay blue? Naw... not at all.

 

[colada584]

Quote:
I don't think my mom beilieves me either. She grew up with chickens, but not EE's and I told her they can lay green, blue or pink eggs. They haven't started laying yet, but yesterday we got our first egg from I believe one of my SLW's. When she came over I showed her the egg and she said "oh you got your first easter egg" and I said "no, I told you, they lay colored eggs, not brown". She just walked away. lol