Funniest Things A City Slicker Has Ever Said To You?

[crtrlovr]

Ok, this wasn't said to me, but a friend of mine relayed this conversation w/ a lady who had come to her place to buy some antiques. My friend had many brooders in her large warehouse-type back room. They were housing several breeds of chickens including Polish and Sultans, Silkies, and some of the standard breeds. She also had ducklings, turkey poults, and peafowl babies. In all, there were somewhere around 200 babies. Some ladies came to her antique store, and while they were there, they heard the noise from the brooders and asked what it was. Martha led them to the brooder room (yes, she uses sanitizer to keep her babies safe!) to show them the little ones. One woman said, "That's a lot of babies! It must take a long time to feed them -- by the time you got through with the bottles, it would be time to start all over!" Martha said, "I couldn't believe my ears. I looked at the ladies behind her, and they weren't laughing. Then I thought, 'I've got it! I'm being punked!". Sadly, no, she wasn't... She explained that birds don't take bottles or nipples like mammals do, and that they learn to eat by themselves very quickly.

 

[PineappleMama]

OY, I just picture a bird with an udder... NOT a pretty sight...

 

[Payette]

Before all of this happened, and I didn't have chickens, ( what a horrifying thought! ) I told my mother that I wanted some chickens, and I would give her some eggs. She told me she could NEVER have a rooster, but she wanted eggs. I couldn't believe it. My own mother didn't know this! Neither did my dad or brother!

I'm sure there are a few other cases like this, but I can't seem to think of anything....

 

[txcarl1258]

It is amazing how many people think you HAVE to have a rooster for the hens to lay eggs. I told a good friend of mine she needed some chickens and she said she didn't want a rooster. Of course she said I want eggs though. I had to think before I spoke so I wouldn't be crude then I had to keep from laughing!

 

[Hollywood Chickens]

The person that I got my goats from has about 8 hens and 3 roosters free ranging the property to keep bugs down, at one point in talking to him about chickens he asked if we had any roosters, my father said no, so he said "wow so do you feed them layer pellet to get them to lay eggs? because you know that they won't lay eggs without a rooster"

 

[Tala]

My boss can't seem to grasp the difference between "pets" and "livestock"

Not sure how he doesn't get it. Seems pretty straightforward to me

 

[sablevulpe]

Quote:
That hurts my brain.

 

[rebelcowboysnb]

Quote:
That's an easy one.

Pets spend there day trying to figure out how to get on the kitchen table. Livestock spends there day trying to figure out how to stay off it.

 

[sablevulpe]

After my neighbor asked the obvious "do you need a rooster to get eggs" question, she followed it up with: "Well, since you have a rooster, how do you get baby chickens?" Misunderstanding, I told her I could leave the eggs in the coop to get hatched. She said, "no, how do the eggs get babies?"

I sighed, and told her, "when a mommy chicken and a daddy rooster love each other very much... wait a minute, you have SEVEN children, do I really have to explain this?"

 

[rebelcowboysnb]

Quote:
If she has 7 then someone needs to tell her what causes that.