Flashy Ember

Rating:
5/5,
  1. HeavensHens88
    This is Ember, my year-old Belgian D'anvers rooster. He was a completely impromtu rescue, along with Scorch and Firestar, that I confiscated by hitting a guy with my purse. The requested tale:
    My mom and I were driving through the middle of the woods a few towns away from ours. We come upon this short, fat Italian guy darting across the road in pursuit of some escapee bantams. We pull over, and I, being the chicken fanatic of the family, was the one to go confront the guy, noting the bashed open chicken crate that seemed to have been thrown from the truck.
    "Hello, sir. Are you in need of assistance?"
    He looks up and gives me a glare. "No, no, no, little girl like you no help. Go mind own business."
    I bite my lip, about ready to scream. "You could use my help. I assure you. Where are you taking these?"
    "Butcher. Little bratitos, they hurt-a me."
    Running scared like lost wind-up toys, these three roos looked about as formidable as flies. "I'll pay you for them."
    Italian dude regards me with the utmost disdain. "No, no, no- I need-a my dinner. You wimpy little girl; no control over bratitos."
    I tap my foot against the road in irritation as I heard Mom snickering from the car. "I know how to deal with a few little roosters, sir."
    Italian dude makes a cuckoo motion near his head and walks away in a huff, futilely attempting to catch a bolting OEGB.
    Now thoroughly enraged, I stalked foward and pivoted to face him. "Sir, I want these roosters. Look, I'll pay you." I flipped open my purse and fanned a handful of bills in his face.
    Italian guy makes a face reminiscent of a sneering hyena. "Little girl-a foolish. Rash and inexperienced." He veered aside to avoid me and began to creep up on one of the D'anvers.
    I am spitting with rage at his undermining egotistical attitude and I dart in front of him. I pull my arm back with all my night and hit him square in the gut with my purse. "Sir, you obviously can't catch these roosters. Bantams make a terrible dinner. I am no little girl and I expect a fair business offer to be taken seriously." I shoved the ten bills into his hands. "Leave, take this, and go buy yourself a ready-made chicken dinner." I spun on my heels and went to claim my spirited roosters from the woods. "Enjoy your meal."
    He cursed a couple of times, and actually left. LOL
    And then I walk by our Jeep, and Mom is guffawing so hard her face is red.
    She enjoyed this so much
    .
    :lau He has settled in quite well with my flock and has a particularly strong affection for Mocha, my Buff Brahama bantam. As one of the sacred few I have successfully leash-trained, Ember is now the star of our local elderly communities and 4-H as a 'therapy chicken'.
    As these pictures portray, he is quite the active little fellow- this was a photo shoot that spanned maybe 8 minutes....
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    Keep on howling,
    ~Sarah

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Comments

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  1. Woytgirl
    I loved the part where you hit him with your purse.
      The Angry Hen likes this.
  2. Woytgirl
    Awesome article:lau
      The Angry Hen likes this.
  3. CP Chicken
    This is crazy awesome. I seriously wish I had as much confidence as you have around people, let alone a total stranger! o_O

    I'm so jealous now, your rooster seems to be quite a special little guy and he's a therapy chicken too??? Wow.... :bow
    1. HeavensHens88
      Trust me, having excessive audacity is not the best thing in the world. :oops:
      There're sometimes I wish I was too shy to do crazy stuff like this. :lol:

      :p He is pretty cool.
      Yeah, he goes to our local nursing homes and wears a chicken diaper. Everybody loves him because of his muff! :lau
  4. Flufferes
    Wait, so you slapped an Italian with your purse? This is tooooo good o_O:lau
    1. HeavensHens88
      Ask Mom- everything written here is absolutely true. :cool:
      I really don't like being called little girl. :mad:
      Flufferes likes this.
  5. Flufferes
    Wait- This actually happened!? :lol: Saeah, this story is awesome. I love this XD
    1. HeavensHens88
      There is not a single lie in any part of any paragraph. :p
      You wouldn't believe how much humor Mom takes in telling her friends. :lau
  6. CuzChickens
    Wow, Girl, I would not have gotten out of the car and confronted a random guy in the first place, but hit him with your purse!?!? I admire you even more now. *bows at feet
    1. HeavensHens88
      :lol: I honestly don't know where I get the audacity to do such things.
      Trust me, my brazeness has resulted in bad things- this is one of the few times something actually worked out in my favor.
      I'd rather be someone to stand on the sidelines any day. ;)
  7. The Angry Hen
    I LOVE the story!!!!!!!!!
  8. The Angry Hen
    The way you took the pictures it looks like he is on a mission, Cute!
    1. HeavensHens88
      Thanks! Most often, he IS on a mission-
      A mission to track down where I hid the goose feed this time. :rolleyes:
      The Angry Hen likes this.
    2. The Angry Hen
      That's so cute!! :)
  9. penny1960
    What a great story thanks for sharing the story one might not believe
    told second hand.. i will not be the one to repeat it :>]
  10. chcikenlady
    He is a pretty thing!

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