I would definitely make an appointment with a doctor to get some type of depression medication or something that can help you.Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of. My first school I dropped out because I was extremely depressed and failing all my classes. I had already dropped out of some of the classes because of it and thought I’d have time to get my grade up in the past couple and everyone was amazing/fantastic trying to help me but it was just too late.
It was weird though cause the first year I did great and got great grades and stuff. Idk. I guess I was just happy to be away from home or trying to impress everyone or something. But I also had an amazing friend that year too but then she left the second year. I think that was part of it. Not that my other roommates weren’t great, they were, and we all got along great, but we just didn’t have the same connection. With her, we’re inseparable, like long lost sisters haha we don’t talk as much now but only cause she kinda sucks at texting/long distance communication.but we’ve met up several times since and it’s like we never left. That really helped me that first year cause I was struggling a ton then too and dealing with a lot but she helped me so much and the other ones even though they were great I felt like I couldn’t tell them anything.
And even just at the community college, which theoretically should have been way less stressful and way easier, and with amazing professors and students, it wasn’t. I mean, it was. But I still would get super stressed out.
Idk. I don’t think I’m cut out for school.
And you’re right about experience. And especially in something like dog training, no one looks at degrees and most don’t even have them I don’t think. They care much more about certifications and experience.
I think I’d be better off just going into a training certification program and getting started.
And I didn’t know it was oversaturated. That is good to know and more reason to not waste time/money going into it. I figured everyone was in psych or animal science haha
And thank you.
That particular one was actually a typo. I meant I don’t hate myself. At least not now. I did years ago. Actually, that friend I mentioned above was one of the ones who really helped through that too. Like I said, was going through a lot then haha
I used to struggle to even think of anything I liked about myself back then. She made me make a list every day of 5 things I liked about myself. And they had to be different ones every day. And not something easy like my eyes or some shit. Man I really struggled with that list for a while. I literally struggled to think of even just 5 things I liked about myself. But it got easier and easier. I’m much better now. I mostly like myself now.
That said, I do think I still have depression. It’s just not as obvious as it was back then. But it’s been worse lately. I’ve been pretty bad again lately.
I did actually find a therapist though that’s located literally like across the street from me and takes my insurance and everything and specializes in the exact issues I’m dealing with. Been meaning to call her.
I do think I need to do something because I do think that’s a big part of why I’ve been so bad lately
Sometimes even if you push yourself with depression you still are defeated by it.
I say this because I have first-hand experience with depression. When I got diagnosed with pulmonary hypertension and graves disease, my world completely fell apart. I had a heart attack at 22 and I was told I wasn't going to live very long, it completely wrecked my life. When I moved to Virginia things started to get a lot better, but we were trying out different medications and one of them was very painful it was an IV that you do subq (remodulin). Some days I couldn't even walk. I have my doctors cell phone number and he was the person who talked me off a ledge so to speak. Now I'm on medication and I'm not embarrassed to say that.
Depression or any type of mental illness is hard to deal with on your own. Some people don't understand them and think they're just silly made up illnesses.
the mostly silver half on the right is what i had Before Halloween all bought here and there on clearance, the mostly red half i got All on black friday, spent 35$ saved 20. The littles' big gift is to be a radio flyer car toy i have lined up off of CL to be picked up Saturday for 40$. The teen will get 100$ as her big gift.
its 6 ft long 
about the resume though.... don’t have one. 
I feel like I should already have it on hand to leave with them? But I don’t want to wait while I make one, already waited long enough, so I’ll just go in somewhere and see. Thinking maybe pet store and movies. Or maybe some of the many places down the street from me. The grocery store has great benefits supposedly. I feel like that’d be boring though but a job is a job. And all they do is like stand around and talk to each other haha
